How do I get over a girl?

[Saint Nick]

Go and hit the first piece of hot tail you see.

 

[manlymatt83]

Originally posted by: KarenMarie
Here is my take.

Let it go.

Here is why....

you cannot trust her. I dont mean just in the seeing someone else way. I mean that you cannot trust her to do what is best for your relationship. She puts her thoughts, feelings, wants and whims before what is good for the relationship and in a case like that, it will never work. i skimmed thru this thread and i think... You are apart for a reason and in my opinion this is just more trouble than it is worth.

i would not call her at all. just not even pick up the phone. if she wants you, she knows where to find you. and if she doesnt.... her silence will speak volumes.

you need to be with someone who respects and cherishes you. she does not do that, from what i am reading.

as far as the parents thing goes... i will offer you this.

first of all, if any guy ever cheated on my daughter... he would never eat with his own teeth again. i would ensure that. but... i dont have a daughter who would ever go back to someone who cheated. Next i will tell you that the ONLY thing VeggieFrog and i ever disagreed on was her b/f. he was a good kid when they met, but i thought she deserved so much more. she saw something in him and i thought that was fine... for someone else's daughter. But in the end... it was the ONLY thing she ever stood up to me about. And she was on the verge of losing EVERYTHING... and she stood firm for him. Which made me take a second look and be patient. It really worked out for them. She was right and I was wrong and I let him know that.

My point is that if she is not willing to do the same for you... you need to be with someone who will think you important enough to.

It seems to me that this girl is confused. if she is concerned that she has not been around enough... she will never be satisfied with you and i can almost guarantee that you are gonna break up again anyway.

Dont put yourself thru it for a second longer than you need it. Let it go and move on. Let her do the assbusting if she wants it. Doesnt seem to me like she does though.

Please understand that I don't consider that I cheated on her. It was a very messed up situation at the time, we were on a break, but we weren't, etc. I could say it could be considered cheating, but I DO NOT CHEAT on my girlfriends. We were long distance, and it was a situation which I can not explain at this time. But I do understand what you are saying, and I'm too tired to justify exactly what it was. Either way, I screwed her over. Plain and simple. And I admit that.

But I agree with you. All I ever wanted her to do was fight for me. She wanted me, she was happy with me (I KNOW THAT from countless times we spent weekends together (innocently) and all she could do was smile)... yet when it came to her parents, she just couldn't fight.

So I'm supposed to call her tonight... should I Just not call her? And should I just delete her email account from my server (which will surely make her suspicious?) ... or should I hold off on that and just not call her tonight?

 

[edprush]

She looks like a great girl.

I hope this loss isn't why geounion.com isn't up yet

 

[manlymatt83]

Originally posted by: edprush
She looks like a great girl.

I hope this loss isn't why geounion.com isn't up yet

She is a great girl. And while we were together I was the most happy I've ever been.

 

[KarenMarie]

you are supposed to call her.. for what? another long drawn out discussion on what went wrong and what it is gonna take to put it right again?

if that is the case.. i would not call. but i am almost twice your age and just do not put up with the bullshit anymore.

and no, dont delete her account. if you delete it, it will look a an action of anger or spite. just pretend it is not there.

 

[Pepsei]

oh my god, do a favor for both of you, please stop this self destructive behavior. let her go, she IS playing games with you and you ARE playing it back.

 

[Krazefinn]

She's playin' you, esp with her only sharing negatives with parents. Its time to listen to karenmarie and move on. She has to prove herself at this point, if what she says has any truth behind it. You need to go on. End of story. And quit hoping...LET HER GO. If she comes back, well, thats another story. And by moving on now, you will equip yourself with the perspective and ability to find a better soulmate. One who maybe isnt so conflicted and unsure of herself.

 

[manlymatt83]

Originally posted by: KarenMarie
you are supposed to call her.. for what? another long drawn out discussion on what went wrong and what it is gonna take to put it right again?

if that is the case.. i would not call. but i am almost twice your age and just do not put up with the bullshit anymore.

and no, dont delete her account. if you delete it, it will look a an action of anger or spite. just pretend it is not there.

What if I called her and just talked to her as a friend? And not even mentioning our problems? Then when she leaves in a few days and we stop talking, at least we left it as civil.

 

[KarenMarie]

Originally posted by: mjuszczak

Originally posted by: KarenMarie
you are supposed to call her.. for what? another long drawn out discussion on what went wrong and what it is gonna take to put it right again?

if that is the case.. i would not call. but i am almost twice your age and just do not put up with the bullshit anymore.

and no, dont delete her account. if you delete it, it will look a an action of anger or spite. just pretend it is not there.

What if I called her and just talked to her as a friend? And not even mentioning our problems? Then when she leaves in a few days and we stop talking, at least we left it as civil.

you are gonna call her no matter what anyone else tells you... and if that is the case... you deserve everything you get.

sorry.

 

[manlymatt83]

Originally posted by: KarenMarie

Originally posted by: mjuszczak

Originally posted by: KarenMarie
you are supposed to call her.. for what? another long drawn out discussion on what went wrong and what it is gonna take to put it right again?

if that is the case.. i would not call. but i am almost twice your age and just do not put up with the bullshit anymore.

and no, dont delete her account. if you delete it, it will look a an action of anger or spite. just pretend it is not there.

What if I called her and just talked to her as a friend? And not even mentioning our problems? Then when she leaves in a few days and we stop talking, at least we left it as civil.

you are gonna call her no matter what anyone else tells you... and if that is the case... you deserve everything you get.

sorry.

No. I'm not going to call her if there's really no way to call her without getting hurt. Are you saying calling her as a friend is also a bad idea?

 

[KarenMarie]

Originally posted by: mjuszczak

Originally posted by: KarenMarie
you are gonna call her no matter what anyone else tells you... and if that is the case... you deserve everything you get.

sorry.

No. I'm not going to call her if there's really no way to call her without getting hurt. Are you saying calling her as a friend is also a bad idea?

what i am saying is that this is an unhealthy, damaged relationship and it does not look like it is getting any better. i am saying that there comes a point in maturity when you have to know when to stop beating a dead horse and call it a day. i am saying that if you dont get hurt with this phone call, you are only postponing the inevtiable. i am saying that just because you want something with all your heart does not mean it is good for you.

i am not trying to be hurtful, i promise.

 

[munruss]

Have sex with her best friend! Always works!

 

[classy]

22? Are you kidding me, to get over her? For that? Man you need a swift kick in the rearend. You should shake that off overnight. Sheesh Some of yall need to grow up.

 

[coomar]

cut her off completely

try to find some community rec or other groups and meet new people

 

[McGyver]

dude, we all been there, done that. lots of fish out there. no worry.

 

[EatSpam]

Originally posted by: jumpr

Originally posted by: mjuszczak
she left still saying she loved me and missed me but wanted to see other people because she "knew I was the one for her but couldn't stay with me knowing I was her only boyfriend".

Translation: she's getting boned by another guy.

Sorry.

qft... its over. Move on.

 

[SokaMoka]

Sure I know you feel bad, but IMHO WTF??

"Oh I love you and still do & think you are awesome but since you were my only BF you have to go but I still love you" = WTF ?

What kind of rationalization is this ?? She is LYING she just realized she doesn't want you to know that she was just dragging you along until she found something better, and knew there is no other way of saying it other than running away and doing it in a very cowardly way.

Back when I was crazy / insane (was looking for a girl) I would have done anything to have a gf that had no other BF and most probably marrying her if I graduated and still have her with me.


I understand you feeling bad, but feel bad about wasting your time with her (she was a waste of 2 years that's all) , she has nothing to do with logic, like most girls I know >_<

Like this one b!tch that comes to mind . ("Oh you have been the nicest guy to me ever (and I was), that's why I used you as an emotional slave and went and cheated on you with a biker boy that beat the sht out of me when he came over to my place drunk as fvck, I still like him, OH I LOVE BADASS BOYS"

OK she didn't say it like that but that's what happened in essence and yes she still liked him and I found out about them after the he hit her !

"Well you had it coming b!tch (Gangster biker biys aren't the nicest people on earth you know), but what a dumbass really you weren't worth the semen waste I don't see how you were worth time in jail JUST GO FIND ANOTHER BIKER MAYBE THE'LL GET YOU GOOD NEXT TIME!!" ---> That I really told her like that.

Girls love to experiment DON'T YOU GET IT. Girls like her use guys like you for lab rats for the moment (don't be offended I was one but finally I broke away after a couple of crazy experiments, and now I am a mutant rat :evil: ), then finally once they are 30 or something they'll be looking for guys that are / were nice to them.

But nice guys like you or me will be there to tell them "Too late idiot, you fvcking wasted the chance of your life experimenting now you want to settle go FVCK off or something!!" in a sense.

From one hurt man to another REALIZE THIS , you deserved better she didn't appreciate you.
And I don't buy this "You were the only BF in my life BS", she just wanted to experiment.

 

[krunchykrome]

OMG, it looks like my Intermediate Accounting III professor 20 years ago.

 

[mrrman]

its always hard but there are more out there...as soon as you meet another lady, this one is only a memory

 

[tjaisv]

Originally posted by: Astaroth33
The only way to get over a girl in any reasonable timeframe is to get another girl.

Agreed.

 

[manlymatt83]

wow...

 

[KarenMarie]

Originally posted by: mjuszczak
wow...

wow... what?

 

[Saint Nick]

SofaMoka is a fountain of relationship advice I think that what you really need to do is go out and find some new people and completely remove all ties with that girl.

 

[manlymatt83]

She called me a little while ago to apologize, say she's sorry, that all she wants is me, thats he loves me, and that she was watching sex and the city and all of her girlfriends were watching with her and they were all like "Wow, I wish my boyfriend did stuff like that for me." (it was on the TV).... she sat there and said "Well, my x-boyfriend did that stuff for me!" to herself.... and so she called me....

 

[Saint Nick]

Originally posted by: mjuszczak
She called me a little while ago to apologize, say she's sorry, that all she wants is me, thats he loves me, and that she was watching sex and the city and all of her girlfriends were watching with her and they were all like "Wow, I wish my boyfriend did stuff like that for me." (it was on the TV).... she sat there and said "Well, my x-boyfriend did that stuff for me!" to herself.... and so she called me....

She's playing games dude. If she has done all this crap so far, why would you even still mess with her? It should be red flag city for you. Stop talking to her already!