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Holy mother of...

irishScott

irishScott

Lifer
So I need to take a dump at my gym. There a 3 stalls, 2 are taken, I move to the empty one and OMGWTFBBQBATMAN there is this HUGE turd in the toilet. I mean thicker then my wrist, and about as long as my forearm (I'm 5'10" 178 lbs). The thing is unflushable. If I had to pass that, I'd fricken rip apart. I know steroids can do crazy a$$ things but this thing was as thick as a Chipotle Burrito and Longer. DamnHolyWTF.
 
my sister would leave those when she was a kid. they were un-flushable and i will never understand how they were humanly possible.
 
Originally posted by: irishScott
So I need to take a dump at my gym. There a 3 stalls, 2 are taken, I move to the empty one and OMGWTFBBQBATMAN there is this HUGE turd in the toilet. I mean thicker then my wrist, and about as long as my forearm (I'm 5'10" 178 lbs). The thing is unflushable. If I had to pass that, I'd fricken rip apart. I know steroids can do crazy a$$ things but this thing was as thick as a Chipotle Burrito and Longer. DamnHolyWTF.
Click to expand...

Since when do steroids enlarge bowels and anal sphincters?
 
Originally posted by: GuideBot
Originally posted by: irishScott
So I need to take a dump at my gym. There a 3 stalls, 2 are taken, I move to the empty one and OMGWTFBBQBATMAN there is this HUGE turd in the toilet. I mean thicker then my wrist, and about as long as my forearm (I'm 5'10" 178 lbs). The thing is unflushable. If I had to pass that, I'd fricken rip apart. I know steroids can do crazy a$$ things but this thing was as thick as a Chipotle Burrito and Longer. DamnHolyWTF.
Click to expand...

Since when do steroids enlarge bowels and anal sphincters?
Click to expand...

I have no idea, but it's the only explanation I can think of.
 
When I was a freshman in high school my buddy dropped one of those in my Dad's john. It was at least 12 inches long and almost as big around as a 1-liter bottle of soda. I'd never seen anything like it.

After many attempts and near-clogs, we eventually got it to flush. A day later our basement flooded. Turns out it plugged the sewer main. We had to dig up our front yard and replace a section of pipe.

Thanks pal.

Disgusting. Eat some fiber or something.
 
Originally posted by: hungfarover
When I was a freshman in high school my buddy dropped one of those in my Dad's john. It was at least 12 inches long and almost as big around as a 1-liter bottle of soda. I'd never seen anything like it.

After many attempts and near-clogs, we eventually got it to flush. A day later our basement flooded. Turns out it plugged the sewer main. We had to dig up our front yard and replace a section of pipe.

Thanks pal.

Disgusting. Eat some fiber or something.
Click to expand...

I think fiber is the problem.
 
Originally posted by: hungfarover
When I was a freshman in high school my buddy dropped one of those in my Dad's john. It was at least 12 inches long and almost as big around as a 1-liter bottle of soda. I'd never seen anything like it.

After many attempts and near-clogs, we eventually got it to flush. A day later our basement flooded. Turns out it plugged the sewer main. We had to dig up our front yard and replace a section of pipe.

Thanks pal.

Disgusting. Eat some fiber or something.
Click to expand...

:shocked: 😀
 
Originally posted by: hungfarover
When I was a freshman in high school my buddy dropped one of those in my Dad's john. It was at least 12 inches long and almost as big around as a 1-liter bottle of soda. I'd never seen anything like it.

After many attempts and near-clogs, we eventually got it to flush. A day later our basement flooded. Turns out it plugged the sewer main. We had to dig up our front yard and replace a section of pipe.

Thanks pal.

Disgusting. Eat some fiber or something.
Click to expand...

Using a metal clothes hanger to break it into smaller pieces and then throwing said hanger away costs a lot less than digging up the yard and replacing a sewer pipe.

 
Originally posted by: George P Burdell
Originally posted by: hungfarover
When I was a freshman in high school my buddy dropped one of those in my Dad's john. It was at least 12 inches long and almost as big around as a 1-liter bottle of soda. I'd never seen anything like it.

After many attempts and near-clogs, we eventually got it to flush. A day later our basement flooded. Turns out it plugged the sewer main. We had to dig up our front yard and replace a section of pipe.

Thanks pal.

Disgusting. Eat some fiber or something.
Click to expand...

:shocked: 😀
Click to expand...

Man, I'd consider all that water tainted as well as anything it touched.
 
I dropped one the size & shape of a grapefruit at my friend's sister's apartment. It felt like I gave birth. To say it wouldn't go down is an understatement; the contrast in size made the john look like something out of a dollhouse. After much alteration involving the use of a plastic bag, it finally went down - halfway. Then stopped. The water in the john kept slowly rising like a horror movie until it overflowed. Like MacGuyver I deftly added a drinking straw to my plastic bag tool and did some snake action until it finally went down... but the damage was done, about an inch of tainted water on the bathroom floor. Probably the worst day of my life.
 
I did that once. It wasn't that big around, but it was stiff as stick of wood and about 15" long. Would not flush at all. I had to get a disposable knife to hack that piece of crap in half. It was AWESOME. 🙂 I have tried to repeat my accomplishment, but so far have not be successful. 🙁
 
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