The other day I was in the store buying food. I happened to stroll through the hair care aisle. What I say there shocked me.
I buzz my hair really short so I don't have to comb it, or think about it. It's just there, and that's fine with me, I don't really care how it looks. I use a bar of soap on it. Sometimes I use shampoo on it, but if the world ran out of shampoo I wouldn't care. So a cursory walk-through of the hair aisle is usually amusing because I get to see all the products I don't have to worry about or spend money on, having risen above petty human desires such as vanity. My exalted position has left me somewhat naive if you will, though. As such I was not prepared for hair mayonnaise.
It came as a shock to my system. I was accosted by conflicting ideas. The culinary aspect intrigued me, while the hygiene aspect repulsed me. This abomination threatened to topple my entire belief system and way of life.
I mean it would be different if it were hair BBQ sauce. Everything is better with BBQ sauce on it. Or hair ranch dressing. I'd even try hair mustard once. But hair mayonnaise? That's nasty. I don't even eat mayonnaise, because it's disgusting, and it looks like semen. But this is mayonnaise that goes in your hair! Jesus.
So, out of 100,000 people, there has to be at least one who has used this stuff on here. Care to share your experiences?
I buzz my hair really short so I don't have to comb it, or think about it. It's just there, and that's fine with me, I don't really care how it looks. I use a bar of soap on it. Sometimes I use shampoo on it, but if the world ran out of shampoo I wouldn't care. So a cursory walk-through of the hair aisle is usually amusing because I get to see all the products I don't have to worry about or spend money on, having risen above petty human desires such as vanity. My exalted position has left me somewhat naive if you will, though. As such I was not prepared for hair mayonnaise.
It came as a shock to my system. I was accosted by conflicting ideas. The culinary aspect intrigued me, while the hygiene aspect repulsed me. This abomination threatened to topple my entire belief system and way of life.
I mean it would be different if it were hair BBQ sauce. Everything is better with BBQ sauce on it. Or hair ranch dressing. I'd even try hair mustard once. But hair mayonnaise? That's nasty. I don't even eat mayonnaise, because it's disgusting, and it looks like semen. But this is mayonnaise that goes in your hair! Jesus.
So, out of 100,000 people, there has to be at least one who has used this stuff on here. Care to share your experiences?
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