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Guy Bathroom habits that I loathe. Some suggestions.

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Originally posted by: computeerrgghh
Originally posted by: VIAN
I had to shoot up at a 45 degree angle toward the wall so that it wouldn't splash.
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45 degree angle? You are definately doing it wrong. At 45 degrees you are shooting it upwards. You need to shoot at a 310.545 degree angle for optimal non-splashbackage.
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That's what the splash gaurd is there for! You know that little plastic mat in the urinal with the holes in it. Aim for the holes, and for god sake don't stand so close your humping the urinal.

--edit--
Oh yeah and remeber shake it more than 5 times and you're playing with yourself 😛
 
Originally posted by: JoeKing
Originally posted by: imtim83
Originally posted by: JoeKing
Originally posted by: imtim83
Originally posted by: JoeKing
Originally posted by: imtim83
Originally posted by: JoeKing
Originally posted by: imtim83
:thumbsup:
Originally posted by: JulesMaximus
Originally posted by: JoeKing
Originally posted by: JulesMaximus
My goal is to touch as few things as possible in the mens room...except on me of course.

What gets me is the fvckers who just zip up and leave without washing their hands. God dammit, I don't want to touch the door pull handle after you just had your filthy dirty wang hand on there you disgusting evil fvck!!! :|
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ever stop to think how "clean" the faucet handle is?
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Well, if you're washing your hands the last thing to touch the faucet handle is your clean hand to turn it off. Sometimes I just push it down with the edge of my hand.
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Exactly! Thank You for proving this guy so wrong once again!
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wtf? I'll piss on your face.
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:roll:
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piss in your rolling eyes
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What if I told you I had nothing to lose?
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I'd piss on you anyway.
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THe thing is I could care a less.
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Ok

*proceeds to unzip*
Open wide
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is this too long to put in my sig?
 
on the topic of gross sh!tters, i've seen some knarly ones. i can't even describe the sickness without grossing myself out. just picture a campground strictly for 18-25'ers - long weekend - only 3 washrooms for 2000+ partiers. 😛uke:

OP i bet you'd LOVE the urinals at the Joe Louis Arena... 🙂 it's just a big trough where all the men stand & rub shoulders. it's kinda weird looking down and seeing all of the different shades of yellow stream on by. i usually opt for a stall when I'm @ the Joe because after a few beers i can strangely develop some sort of stage fright no matter how bad i have to drain it.
 
Originally posted by: CVSiN

we got these asshats that wont even flush them.. this is at a fortune 500 company where eveyone is college educated.. yet they cant FLUSH THE FVCKING TOILET!
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What does being college educated have to do with flushing the toilet? Do they give out degrees now for knowing how to use a toilet? It wouldn't surprise me, having had the displeasure of working with some recent graduates.
 
Originally posted by: imtim83
What do movie stars do when they have to go to the bathroom in a public place?
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well...if its macualay culkin, he probably pees in a cup and sends in to michael jackson.
 
I hate those urinals with the bowl sticking like a foot out at the bottom. That means you gotta stand like a foot back from the urinal with your manwang hanging out for all to see, whether they like it or not. In that case I take the one closest to the wall and face the wall as I piss.

And I hate people who shlt on the floor. Jesus that's the worst.

What about when you're taking a crap and the floor around the crapper is wet and when you pull your shorts back up you got some...liquid...around the legs of your shorts and it's...weird.
 
The logic is, you aren't there every day and you probably won't see that bathroom a second time for quite a while... plus you aren't the janitor so just pee and if it misses, hey who cares. I don't do this but I'm guessing that's the logic behind it all.
 
Originally posted by: Mrvile
I hate those urinals with the bowl sticking like a foot out at the bottom. That means you gotta stand like a foot back from the urinal with your manwang hanging out for all to see, whether they like it or not. In that case I take the one closest to the wall and face the wall as I piss.

And I hate people who shlt on the floor. Jesus that's the worst.

What about when you're taking a crap and the floor around the crapper is wet and when you pull your shorts back up you got some...liquid...around the legs of your shorts and it's...weird.
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is there such a thing as a femalewang?!? 😕
 
I used to have to clean bathrooms at a restaurant, and the women's bathroom would always smell nice while the men's would smell like sh!t. Pubes and piss would be all over the floor.
 
Originally posted by: xirtam
Originally posted by: EyeMWing
The majority of toilets in public restrooms are included for code reasons ONLY. The only toilet that is to be used for #2 is the handicap stall. The handicap stall is not to be used for peeing unless you're handicapped, or taking a leak while you're dropping off the kids. Unauthorized use of the handicap stall is a sin punishable by revocation of the man-card.

And learn how to use your wang, I don't get splashback on urinals.
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What if some handicapped guy is in there for 10 minutes trying to pass a kidney stone or something and you've gotta go?
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Then you're obviously in a place where there are ridiculous numbers of handicapped people, because NEVER ONCE have I seen any physically handicapped person using a public restroom.
 
Wow. And I thought I was anal about cleanliness! Actually, dude, exposing your body to SOME germs is a good way to build up immunity to them. It's a known fact that children who have excessively clean parents often have more allergy problems as adults.

But I am with you when it comes to lifting the seat to pee (without sitting down) and washing your hands after using the bathroom in any way.
 
We have someone in our building who's ass much be so huge, he streaks the back of the seat with a skidmark. UGH!!!!
 
I hate it when I'm trying to have sex with some guy in the bathroom, and some idiot comes in to use the bathroom as a... bathroom. WTF is up with that?
 
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