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Good gay, Bad gay

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Originally posted by: Ryan
Originally posted by: Triumph
I don't think it has anything to do with homosexuality. I don't like anyone who tries to force their personality (or their views) upon me. So it goes both ways, doesn't it? Whether or not I accept homosexuality is immaterial; anyone screaming out as loud as they can, "LOOK AT ME! I'M DIFFERENT THAN YOU AND YOU MUST ACCEPT ME!" just turns me off and makes me less sympathetic to their cause. To try and claim that this makes me homophobic is a distortion of the truth.

Besides, I have a right to dislike certain styles of dress. Because I laugh at teenagers wearing all black and white face paint, does this make me "gothophobic?" No, I just like to laugh at people who look stupid. Sure you have the right to dress and act that way, and I have the right to dislike it.
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How does someone being a flamer equate to " "LOOK AT ME! I'M DIFFERENT THAN YOU AND YOU MUST ACCEPT ME!""

Nobody is forcing anyone to accept anything. I just don't understand how people get all pissed and shoot off with the typical "STOP FORCING YOUR LIFE ONTO ME, YOUR PUSHING YOUR GAYNESS ONTO ME" can come from someone just being gay, and talking about it. It's a weak argument - being exposed to something doens't mean it's being forced onto you, get a clue.
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I'm talking about the parading types. The types who DO actively try to force their life onto others by purposely being very in-your-face about it. I thought that's what this thread was about? You somehow misread that I equate "being gay" with "forcing opinions upon others."

And again, I don't have to like the flamer lifestyle. The homosexuality aspect of it is immaterial to my distaste for the "Blaine and Antoine" types of In Living Color fame. I also don't like country music, wedding soup, or Toyota Camry's.
 
Originally posted by: Triumph
Originally posted by: Ryan
Originally posted by: Triumph
I don't think it has anything to do with homosexuality. I don't like anyone who tries to force their personality (or their views) upon me. So it goes both ways, doesn't it? Whether or not I accept homosexuality is immaterial; anyone screaming out as loud as they can, "LOOK AT ME! I'M DIFFERENT THAN YOU AND YOU MUST ACCEPT ME!" just turns me off and makes me less sympathetic to their cause. To try and claim that this makes me homophobic is a distortion of the truth.

Besides, I have a right to dislike certain styles of dress. Because I laugh at teenagers wearing all black and white face paint, does this make me "gothophobic?" No, I just like to laugh at people who look stupid. Sure you have the right to dress and act that way, and I have the right to dislike it.
Click to expand...

How does someone being a flamer equate to " "LOOK AT ME! I'M DIFFERENT THAN YOU AND YOU MUST ACCEPT ME!""

Nobody is forcing anyone to accept anything. I just don't understand how people get all pissed and shoot off with the typical "STOP FORCING YOUR LIFE ONTO ME, YOUR PUSHING YOUR GAYNESS ONTO ME" can come from someone just being gay, and talking about it. It's a weak argument - being exposed to something doens't mean it's being forced onto you, get a clue.
Click to expand...

I'm talking about the parading types. The types who DO actively try to force their life onto others by purposely being very in-your-face about it. I thought that's what this thread was about? You somehow misread that I equate "being gay" with "forcing opinions upon others."
Click to expand...

i think triumph said pretty much the same think i said earlier.

it's not just a gay issue. it's about flamboyant vs conservative in any walk of life. the guy always doing his mock golf swings in inappropriate places, the guy who sings when no one else wants to hear it . . .

 
Originally posted by: Triumph
Originally posted by: Ryan
Originally posted by: Triumph
I don't think it has anything to do with homosexuality. I don't like anyone who tries to force their personality (or their views) upon me. So it goes both ways, doesn't it? Whether or not I accept homosexuality is immaterial; anyone screaming out as loud as they can, "LOOK AT ME! I'M DIFFERENT THAN YOU AND YOU MUST ACCEPT ME!" just turns me off and makes me less sympathetic to their cause. To try and claim that this makes me homophobic is a distortion of the truth.

Besides, I have a right to dislike certain styles of dress. Because I laugh at teenagers wearing all black and white face paint, does this make me "gothophobic?" No, I just like to laugh at people who look stupid. Sure you have the right to dress and act that way, and I have the right to dislike it.
Click to expand...

How does someone being a flamer equate to " "LOOK AT ME! I'M DIFFERENT THAN YOU AND YOU MUST ACCEPT ME!""

Nobody is forcing anyone to accept anything. I just don't understand how people get all pissed and shoot off with the typical "STOP FORCING YOUR LIFE ONTO ME, YOUR PUSHING YOUR GAYNESS ONTO ME" can come from someone just being gay, and talking about it. It's a weak argument - being exposed to something doens't mean it's being forced onto you, get a clue.
Click to expand...

I'm talking about the parading types. The types who DO actively try to force their life onto others by purposely being very in-your-face about it. I thought that's what this thread was about? You somehow misread that I equate "being gay" with "forcing opinions upon others."
Click to expand...

But still - how does that force your acceptance?
 
Originally posted by: Ryan
Originally posted by: Triumph
Originally posted by: Ryan
Originally posted by: Triumph
I don't think it has anything to do with homosexuality. I don't like anyone who tries to force their personality (or their views) upon me. So it goes both ways, doesn't it? Whether or not I accept homosexuality is immaterial; anyone screaming out as loud as they can, "LOOK AT ME! I'M DIFFERENT THAN YOU AND YOU MUST ACCEPT ME!" just turns me off and makes me less sympathetic to their cause. To try and claim that this makes me homophobic is a distortion of the truth.

Besides, I have a right to dislike certain styles of dress. Because I laugh at teenagers wearing all black and white face paint, does this make me "gothophobic?" No, I just like to laugh at people who look stupid. Sure you have the right to dress and act that way, and I have the right to dislike it.
Click to expand...

How does someone being a flamer equate to " "LOOK AT ME! I'M DIFFERENT THAN YOU AND YOU MUST ACCEPT ME!""

Nobody is forcing anyone to accept anything. I just don't understand how people get all pissed and shoot off with the typical "STOP FORCING YOUR LIFE ONTO ME, YOUR PUSHING YOUR GAYNESS ONTO ME" can come from someone just being gay, and talking about it. It's a weak argument - being exposed to something doens't mean it's being forced onto you, get a clue.
Click to expand...

I'm talking about the parading types. The types who DO actively try to force their life onto others by purposely being very in-your-face about it. I thought that's what this thread was about? You somehow misread that I equate "being gay" with "forcing opinions upon others."
Click to expand...

But still - how does that force your acceptance?
Click to expand...

Well if it doesn't at least attempt to force acceptance, then go tell your flamboyantly gay buddies to give it up.
 
Originally posted by: Triumph
Originally posted by: Ryan
Originally posted by: Triumph
Originally posted by: Ryan
Originally posted by: Triumph
I don't think it has anything to do with homosexuality. I don't like anyone who tries to force their personality (or their views) upon me. So it goes both ways, doesn't it? Whether or not I accept homosexuality is immaterial; anyone screaming out as loud as they can, "LOOK AT ME! I'M DIFFERENT THAN YOU AND YOU MUST ACCEPT ME!" just turns me off and makes me less sympathetic to their cause. To try and claim that this makes me homophobic is a distortion of the truth.

Besides, I have a right to dislike certain styles of dress. Because I laugh at teenagers wearing all black and white face paint, does this make me "gothophobic?" No, I just like to laugh at people who look stupid. Sure you have the right to dress and act that way, and I have the right to dislike it.
Click to expand...

How does someone being a flamer equate to " "LOOK AT ME! I'M DIFFERENT THAN YOU AND YOU MUST ACCEPT ME!""

Nobody is forcing anyone to accept anything. I just don't understand how people get all pissed and shoot off with the typical "STOP FORCING YOUR LIFE ONTO ME, YOUR PUSHING YOUR GAYNESS ONTO ME" can come from someone just being gay, and talking about it. It's a weak argument - being exposed to something doens't mean it's being forced onto you, get a clue.
Click to expand...

I'm talking about the parading types. The types who DO actively try to force their life onto others by purposely being very in-your-face about it. I thought that's what this thread was about? You somehow misread that I equate "being gay" with "forcing opinions upon others."
Click to expand...

But still - how does that force your acceptance?
Click to expand...

Well if it doesn't at least attempt to force acceptance, then go tell your flamboyantly gay buddies to give it up.
Click to expand...

Again - how does it force your acceptance? Your unwillingness to answer specifically shows that maybe you arent' being forced to do anything.

Also - I don't have and flamboyantly gay buddies 😉
 
Originally posted by: aidanjm
So there is this view held by some folks in the gay community (I'll call them the 'good gays'), that the flamboyant, flaming, super-gay guys (the 'bad gays') are the cause of all our problems.

If only the bad gays would tone it down, act more normal, stop speaking with a lisp, or drawing attention to themselves in general, then everything would be ok. If only they'd stop being so damn political! Discrimination would end.

To the good gays, bad gays seem very unappealing because they are simply so... gay.

Good gays resent bad gays becuase they think the bad gays give all other gay people a "bad name".

My own view is that the "good gays" should take the time to examine where their attitudes are coming from. (I think the issue is internalized homophobia - good gays have been taught by the culture that being gay is bad, so they cringe at anything that is unashamedly flaming. Subconsciously, they believe that being gay is only OK if you are otherwise 'normal'.) I also think the flamboyant "f@gs" of this world are the true heroes. Gay rights didn't come into existence because of hiding in the closet or pretending to be "normal".

What are YOUR opinions? Don't hold back. 🙂
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I think completely the opposite.. Often the flamboyant gays are given a bad name because they are completely immature and devoid from acting like adults. They throw their sexuality out in the open - when society usually likes to keep its bedroom preferences in the bedroom.

Men shouldn't act like children - gay or not. Gay men are still men.

Also, essentually you're saying that the 'good gays' are not embracing their gayness.. like it's normal and proper for them to act like flamboyant screwballs with no sense of style or dignity. That's just like the ghetto black people hating smart black people for not being black enough... when ghetto IS NOT a prereq for being black; it is independent of race.

Oh ya.. flamboyant behaviour is not always indicative of gayness. It would be a false assumption that every musical actor, fashion designer, interior decorator, etc is gay. Look at French people.. many of them are crazy flamboyant - but most aren't gay.


 
Originally posted by: Ryan

Again - how does it force your acceptance? Your unwillingness to answer specifically shows that maybe you arent' being forced to do anything.

Also - I don't have and flamboyantly gay buddies 😉
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I won't disagree that it isn't forcing me to do anything. I have free will. But a gay pride parade full of leather clad cross dressing men is certainly trying to force acceptance onto others. That's my point.

So maybe there are two flamers. The flamers who like the dress and the mannerisms. Well I don't have to like them anymore than I have to like country music. Or the flamers who do it just to bring attention to the fact that they're gay. In that case, they should give it up because it's only alienating people rather than helping them to accept you.
 
Honestly, I can't stand 'bad gays' for any long period of time. Not the fact that they are gay, just the gheyness.
Yes, you asked for my opinion and here it is.
 
The fact that you (or anybody) actually differentiate between "good" and "bad" gays, is the problem.
 
Originally posted by: Coquito
I think you are obviously a very sexual being that shouldn't be locked down by his pc.

Go birdie, fly... fly wherever you heart will lead! 🙂
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hahaha:wine::lips:
 
there are also bad straights. A bad straight guy is a guy who always says something disgusting whenever a woman walks by, or starts high-fiving any time the number "69" is embedded somewhere (e.g., a score in a basketball game), or asks for pics when someone posts a YAGT
 
I don't think gays should have special rights. I don't get hetero-rights.

If you are gay and choose to be flamboyant, you will have to accept people judging you. Same goes with tattoos and other such outward markers. If you don't like that, then quit acting in a fashion that makes people think "Holy crap, that guy is really gay!" right from the start.
 
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