Apologizes to Moonbeam in advance, if my attempt to re-phrase in simpler terms causes me to be in error, or guilty of similar trespass.
It seems to me the conversation, not that we’ve had much of one, would improve if we could deal with the actual things people say instead of addressing the boxes into which we have put them. What I see is an intolerant rejection of others based on ideology.
Masculinity has toxic parts. The modern term, however, states that inherent to masculinity is something toxic.
@P&N
This is the crux of the discussion.
Some men do horrible things. But now we have stereotyped slander onto all men, and far too many posters are wondering why that is a bad thing. Or they'll tell us "!@#$ your feelings". To hijack a familiar phrase, these posters are telling us "I'm not Trump, you're Trump!". However, their comfort with Trumpanze behavior is disturbing. The last thing this country needs is for us to emulate the right wing. Or to embrace its depravity.
We are only human, and for that we all risk slipping into madness as we create and defend sacred cows. As we take shortcuts to throw people into boxes and strip them of their innocence, guilt by association! Guilt by being "other"! Do you not care, that you have likely targeted good people in a crusade against bad people?
The issue is that the commercial does it. Reinforced by posters repeating that mistake here as well. I posted earlier, Toxic Masculinity is not a common term. You are using foreign language that, in translation, will mean ALL MEN. Instead of saying "some men are bad", the message will be received as "all men are bad". And the reactions will follow in accordance with that reception.
It's not the underlying message that is wrong. It is the delivery.
But then to jump on people whose vocabulary is different, who probably didn't take some gender studies course in the past 10 years, who only heard that term from gender hating extremists, who think you're telling us that men are toxic. This miscommunication is creeping up all over the place. There was another recent topic, where the definition was racism is defined in a very restrictive way. Again, with language that is not common, or shared. Therein are differences of opinion where we risk seeding needless conflict.
People who do not share your definitions, of language, are going to have different reactions to complex narratives. That does not make them evil, or like Trump. Wars have been started over poor translations. Do not make the same primitive mistakes as your ancestors. American culture may be splintered, but those "other" people are not evil. You're just not delivering to them, the messages you think you are.
In this particular case, nuance is important to the message being delivered. And I fear that nuance is lost in translation.
#Metoo is an important moment of backlash for women to assert themselves. To stand up to the cultural abuse they have suffered. But we can support it more broadly if we find ways to appeal and bring together more independents and moderates with messages they can all understand and appreciate. That can appeal to a wider audience. Toxic Masculinity is not one of them.
There are better ways to ask men to do better. And better ways to react when they don't understand a message.
