Funny sayings

[igor_kavinski]

Everyone loves their Woody.

Sadly, there's a vast number of people who haven't seen their Woody in years

 

[DAPUNISHER]

Bless her insane heart.

On the infrequent occasion we run into an old friend or co-worker of my wife at the store. The ones that are not friends with her on FB sometimes comment how sweet it is we are still together after all these years. She tells them "Yeah, I'm not training another one."

 

[Pohemi]

If at first you don't fricasee, fry, fry a hen.

 

[Paratus]

I’ve been trying to give up making sexual innuendos, but it’s hard. So hard.

 

[igor_kavinski]

It's hard to get hard sometimes. Very, very hard at times. And always hard when you don't want it hard.

 

[Paratus]

One more.

Set a fire for a man and he’s warm for a night.
But set fire to a man and he’s warm the rest of his life.

 

[BoomerD]

Bless her insane heart.

She ain’t always been easy to live with…she’s a tough old blister.

On the infrequent occasion we run into an old friend or co-worker of my wife at the store. The ones that are not friends with her on FB sometimes comment how sweet it is we are still together after all these years. She tells them "Yeah, I'm not training another one."

Your wife and mine must know each other…I’ve heard that for a couple of decades.

 

[IBMJunkman]

Semper Ubi Sub Ubi

 

[DAPUNISHER]

Semper Ubi Sub Ubi

Those yokels will probably burn him at the stake for witchcraft. "What is that?!? Devil talk!?!"

 

[Red Squirrel]

If you program in C, you can shoot yourself in the foot. If you use C++ you can reuse the bullet.

 

[igor_kavinski]

Or shoot twice as fast and blow the damn foot off!

 

[Red Squirrel]

When Putin was in high school, he took a course about Russian history. When the course finished, Putin gave the teacher an A+.

 

[bba-tcg]

Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is you're stupid and make bad decisions.

 

[Charmonium]

It's not how deep the snow is, it's how you plow it - Stephen Colbert, Feb. 13, 2024, all rights reserved.

 

[igor_kavinski]

Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is you're stupid and make bad decisions.

That explains everything! At least for me

 

[pete6032]

If you don't talk to your cats about catnip, who will?

 

[JeepinEd]

Never play Leapfrog with a Unicorn.

 

[jwhorfin]

no matter where you go... there you are...

 

[Charmonium]

What's it like when you travel?

It's just like here, but you're over there

 

[SteveGrabowski]

Let ε<0

 

[BoomerD]

Don't sweat the petty things...

And don't pet the sweaty things.

 

[AdamK47]

They don't think it be like it is, but it do.