Former boyfriend used Craigslist to arrange woman's rape

[lxskllr]

I've done some freaky stuff but the word no should be sacred, a no is always a no, it's a no according to UK law and it's a no according to me.

...and what if you're role playing a rape? How does that work?

 

[JohnOfSheffield]

But what if he thought that's what she wanted?....

This is a really bizarre case. Like someone said, a totally new grey area that has never been encountered before.

It will be interesting to see how this plays out.

Assuming the story is 100% true, I'm going to say the guy doing the raping shouldn't be charged. It's the violent act that gets to our emotions, but if this really had been consensual, it would have been legal.

A mind-twister indeed...

It's no mind twister what so ever, no is no and force is force, if there is no other word agreed upon then NO is the word.

This isn't fucking rocket science.

 

[JohnOfSheffield]

...and what if you're role playing a rape? How does that work?

I'm too old to be stupid, any word to show her displeasure is ok but no is the safeword, it's the legal word and it's the word that makes me stop.

Sure, you can go ahead and play other sheit if you want and use other words, but NONE of that will have any legal bearing what so ever if she decides to take you to court, a no is a no, if it isn't, then get a fucking written contract to replace the word because otherwise she will get to pick you clean.

I don't do rape fantasies though, it's not my thing, i'd go limp if i tried.

 

[sandorski]

If all that is accurate, the Perp should be required to take Counseling for some period of time. The Ex-BF should be given the Maximum Jail Sentence, although I suspect that the Charges that can be laid against him won't offer much Jail time.

The Perpetrator made a huge mistake, but he had no idea that what he was getting into was a vengeful hoax.

 

[lxskllr]

I'm too old to be stupid, any word to show her displeasure is ok but no is the safeword, it's the legal word and it's the word that makes me stop.

Sure, you can go ahead and play other sheit if you want and use other words, but NONE of that will have any legal bearing what so ever if she decides to take you to court, a no is a no, if it isn't, then get a fucking written contract to replace the word because otherwise she will get to pick you clean.

I don't do rape fantasies though, it's not my thing, i'd go limp if i tried.

So you wouldn't expect someone to say "no" if they're playing rape? England's more different than I would have expected

 

[Eli]

That's the point. Once she's tied and gagged, he doesn't know what she wants. He's taken away her ability and her right to communicate her willingness - or lack of same.

Umm... You're kinda failing to grasp this scenario, aren't you? lol

He didn't knock on her door and ask if she wanted tea and a raping. Supposedly, he thought the whole thing was part of the act. That changes things.

 

[JohnOfSheffield]

If all that is accurate, the Perp should be required to take Counseling for some period of time. The Ex-BF should be given the Maximum Jail Sentence, although I suspect that the Charges that can be laid against him won't offer much Jail time.

The Perpetrator made a huge mistake, but he had no idea that what he was getting into was a vengeful hoax.

If he perp is that stupid, he should be shot out of general principle. If not, lifetime in jail.

Ex boyfriend becomes perps new boyfriend, everyone is happy.

Or should i say... fucking happy.

 

[JohnOfSheffield]

Umm... You're kinda failing to grasp this scenario, aren't you? lol

He didn't knock on her door and ask if she wanted tea and a raping. Supposedly, he thought the whole thing was part of the act. That changes things.

No it doesn't, i might think you want me to kick your arse, am i entitled to kick your arse then?

Probably fucking not, right? Well why would it be ok with rape then?

 

[sandorski]

If he perp is that stupid, he should be shot out of general principle. If not, lifetime in jail.

Ex boyfriend becomes perps new boyfriend, everyone is happy.

Or should i say... fucking happy.

I disagree, but that was hella stupid of him.

 

[Eli]

It's no mind twister what so ever, no is no and force is force, if there is no other word agreed upon then NO is the word.

This isn't fucking rocket science.

I understand what you're saying but.. It was supposedly a rape fantasy.

If he really, truly thought it was all part of the act... what then?

If this happened, it was consensual, but someone heard it and called the cops, no charges would be filed.

It's a hard thing. Like I said, the act is so violent.. but it is really not hard to understand what happened here. I trust that the court system will accurately determine who the psychopath is in this case.

 

[lxskllr]

No it doesn't, i might think you want me to kick your arse, am i entitled to kick your arse then?

Probably fucking not, right? Well why would it be ok with rape then?

I suggest you do a Google image search of "bondage sm" with safe search off, and you tell me what you think might be considered reasonable, or over the top.

 

[mugs]

When referring to "he" and "him" it would be useful to specify whether you're referring to McDowell (the "rapist") or Stipe (the ex-boyfriend). People are saying "he" should be punished but not specifying which "he" they're referring to, and that seems to be confusing some people.

McDowell is an idiot for not properly checking, setting up safe words, anything like that... but sending him to prison for this is ridiculous. Entrapment is the best word to use for this. Perhaps put Stipe in for the rape/etc charges.

Maybe they did choose a safe word; she wouldn't have known it because it wasn't her talking to him. It's easy to say now that he should have called rather than IMing, but I don't think it was unreasonable for him to assume he was talking to the woman who posted the ad.

I agree, let McDowell go and charge Stipe with rape (or whatever they can charge him with)

 

[daniel1113]

No it doesn't, i might think you want me to kick your arse, am i entitled to kick your arse then?

Probably fucking not, right? Well why would it be ok with rape then?

It's not rape if there is consent. Hence why this is an interesting legal issue.

 

[JohnOfSheffield]

So you wouldn't expect someone to say "no" if they're playing rape? England's more different than I would have expected

First of all, playing rape is a fucked up thing and anyone who wants to engage in that needs to be shot in the head, an 870 would probably do the job but an 8 gauge fowler would do it better, i would have no problems supplying that gun to such an individual.

Second, it's the legal word, if a woman says no, you stop, that is how the law works, it's not exclusive to the UK, it's the same in the US, of course some retards continue beyond that point and get charged with rape and cry about their 10 year sentence in court... me? nah.

A no is a no is a no is a no, best thing you can teach your daughter and best thing i ever taught both my son and daughter, a no is a no, PERIOD.

People need to play rape? Why? If it's not enough just to have sex, get another woman.

 

[sixone]

Umm... You're kinda failing to grasp this scenario, aren't you? lol

He didn't knock on her door and ask if she wanted tea and a raping. Supposedly, he thought the whole thing was part of the act. That changes things.

You seem to be failing to grasp that she has the right to change her mind, no matter what she asked for. McDowell completely denied her that right.

 

[daniel1113]

First of all, playing rape is a fucked up thing and anyone who wants to engage in that needs to be shot in the head, an 870 would probably do the job but an 8 gauge fowler would do it better, i would have no problems supplying that gun to such an individual.

Second, it's the legal word, if a woman says no, you stop, that is how the law works, it's not exclusive to the UK, it's the same in the US, of course some retards continue beyond that point and get charged with rape and cry about their 10 year sentence in court... me? nah.

A no is a no is a no is a no, best thing you can teach your daughter and best thing i ever taught both my son and daughter, a no is a no, PERIOD.

People need to play rape? Why? If it's not enough just to have sex, get another woman.

You have a very interesting understanding of the US legal system. Where did you get your law degree?

 

[ConstipatedVigilante]

No it doesn't, i might think you want me to kick your arse, am i entitled to kick your arse then?

Probably fucking not, right? Well why would it be ok with rape then?

If he really thought it was part of an act, then that implies a lack of malicious intent. Aggressive thoughts, but likely not those geared toward human suffering, but rather a strange kind of pleasure. The whole point of punishing someone is to keep them from hurting others in society. If the person being punished would only do something that he thought the other person wanted, then he should get a lesser sentence.

And an automatic restraining order from the person he raped.

 

[Eli]

No it doesn't, i might think you want me to kick your arse, am i entitled to kick your arse then?

Probably fucking not, right? Well why would it be ok with rape then?

If I told you that I received sexual satisfaction out of you kicking my ass, and you thought that I wanted my ass kicked, so you kicked my ass.. then I pressed charges for assault, do you think I would win?

The difference is in the sexual aspect of it.

 

[JohnOfSheffield]

It's not rape if there is consent. Hence why this is an interesting legal issue.

It's not an interesting legal issue at all, it's just another rape with a stupid excuse.

If she said no during some point, intent won't matter what so ever.

It's written that way, that if she declines (and no is the key word) and he proceeds, he's raping her.

It's not the first case and it won't be the last.

 

[daniel1113]

It's not an interesting legal issue at all, it's just another rape with a stupid excuse.

If she said no during some point, intent won't matter what so ever.

It's written that way, that if she declines (and no is the key word) and he proceeds, he's raping her.

It's not the first case and it won't be the last.

Actually, many US jurisdictions use a negligence standard for rape, so an honest and reasonable mistake of fact regarding consent is a defense (actually, it makes it impossible to have the requisite mens rea).

 

[JohnOfSheffield]

If I told you that I received sexual satisfaction out of you kicking my ass, and you thought that I wanted my ass kicked, so you kicked my ass.. then I pressed charges for assault, do you think I would win?

The difference is in the sexual aspect of it.

If i came to your door and you said no, and tried to get away...

You can bet your arse that i would get hauled off for assault and battery.

Sexuality must mean different things for different people because i cannot for the world of me understand how you can go to someones house based on just text messages, rape her and say that it is what she wanted.

At fucking least you have to meet and agree at some point?

I've done some S&M and there was always one safe word, i always insisted on it being NO because that is the legal word for stop when it comes to willfull sex acts or unwillfull sex acts, i'd suggest everyone else uses that too. She can still say "please stop" or whatever she wants, just not no.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Ban teh intarweb!!!

Git yer torches an pitchforks here!!!

 

[JohnOfSheffield]

Actually, many US jurisdictions use a negligence standard for rape, so an honest and reasonable mistake of fact regarding consent is a defense (actually, it makes it impossible to have the requisite mens rea).

Well then why don't people just claim they were to drunk to understand that she didn't want to have sex?

If that is really the case then it's fucked up and i am glad my daughter isn't growing up in the SA.. i mean the US.

 

[yhelothar]

+1 for McDowell getting off scott free and Stipe getting the full FPMITA.

Your opinion that rape fantasies are ridiculous doesn't make it illegal.
And saying no is part of the whole fantasy. Otherwise every japanese woman would be legally being raped every time they had sex.

 

[lupi]

is there proof that message as descibred were sent back and forth?