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For all the vigins out there.....
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GTaudiophile
Lifer
<< dude you are so whack if you wait until marriage to have sex. Sex is a very important part of a relationship, and if you both aren't satisfied with your sex life, you'll seek better elsewhere.. >>
You're assuming that sex would be the center/glue of the relationship between myself and my wife. I hope and pray that something larger than sex, like God, will be the center of our relationship.
Pray all you want. God set the odds at 50/50 that your marriage will succeed. If awesome sex tips the scale in your favor great, but an unsatisfied partner would easily greaten your odds of a failed relationship..
I've been with a number of women, all whom i would have married, and i'll tell you their performance has been on a scale of 0-10, at least 2 or 3 of them got a 1, they were awful, boring sex partners. I now have a 10 🙂 i'm very satisfied.
remember your talking about sex with this person for the rest of your life, it better be damn good, interesting, and always more than your expectations...
i've heard of women out there that don't give bj's more than 2-3 times a week. WTF?
Some girls that just lay on their backs and spread. You'll be bored in no time.
Think rest of your life. Marriage is forever, you gotta live with your choices, and you can't honestly say you don't consider her physical traits as a part of the reason you chose this woman.
I've been with a number of women, all whom i would have married, and i'll tell you their performance has been on a scale of 0-10, at least 2 or 3 of them got a 1, they were awful, boring sex partners. I now have a 10 🙂 i'm very satisfied.
remember your talking about sex with this person for the rest of your life, it better be damn good, interesting, and always more than your expectations...
i've heard of women out there that don't give bj's more than 2-3 times a week. WTF?
Some girls that just lay on their backs and spread. You'll be bored in no time.
Think rest of your life. Marriage is forever, you gotta live with your choices, and you can't honestly say you don't consider her physical traits as a part of the reason you chose this woman.
Emulex---maybe YOU'D seek better elsewhere; you sound like that kind of asshole. Sex isn't the be-all and end-all of a relationship; to call people whacked for making their own choices is pretty moronic.
AmusedOne--The fact that you got none while you were married was YOUR problem(and your wife's) and does not apply to the bond of marriage itself. Go spill your bitterness elsewhere.
AmusedOne--The fact that you got none while you were married was YOUR problem(and your wife's) and does not apply to the bond of marriage itself. Go spill your bitterness elsewhere.
Bwahahahahaa!
"Yeah, mah beeyatchez bettah put out and do what I want and it'd better be great or I'd dump that shick so fast. My womenz bettah please me or they be gone, yo!"
If thats your relationships with women I am terribly sorry. Sex is great, but to make it proiority numero uno - to force bj's and say you'll cheat if it isn't great... to dump wonderful women because another chick gives it better in the sack???
sad, sad, sad.
Sheesh.
"Yeah, mah beeyatchez bettah put out and do what I want and it'd better be great or I'd dump that shick so fast. My womenz bettah please me or they be gone, yo!"
If thats your relationships with women I am terribly sorry. Sex is great, but to make it proiority numero uno - to force bj's and say you'll cheat if it isn't great... to dump wonderful women because another chick gives it better in the sack???
sad, sad, sad.
Sheesh.
no elita1, i make sure both of us are completely satisfied before bring our relationship to marriage..
My idea of good sex, is at least once a day, every day, girl orgasms at least 3-4 times before I do, and of course, neither of us get bored. Takes a great deal of effort on both sides of the relationship. Some women out there have different needs than you.
You know some women are okay with having sex 2-3 times a month? Some women won't be satisfied unless they have sex 2-3 times per day? Some are in between that. You do want your woman to be satisfied completely don't you? If not you are probably a single minded two pump chump to begin with.
You'd be suprised how boring some girls are after a year or so... Nothings worse than boring sex, feels like a duty you have to carry out...
One girl i know (as a platonic friend) she's been with 3 or 4 relationships with sex, and never orgasmed. Talk about sucky.
Another chick, she was tiny, every guy she had sex with hurt so bad cause they were too big. I guess her "thing" is abnormally small. 🙂
Wouldn't that suck to marry someone like that and end up not making them happy in that department?
Would your love of GOD and each other overcome that? I dunno..
i mean thats cool if you want to get married a virgin, very noble, i wish the best of luck...
My idea of good sex, is at least once a day, every day, girl orgasms at least 3-4 times before I do, and of course, neither of us get bored. Takes a great deal of effort on both sides of the relationship. Some women out there have different needs than you.
You know some women are okay with having sex 2-3 times a month? Some women won't be satisfied unless they have sex 2-3 times per day? Some are in between that. You do want your woman to be satisfied completely don't you? If not you are probably a single minded two pump chump to begin with.
You'd be suprised how boring some girls are after a year or so... Nothings worse than boring sex, feels like a duty you have to carry out...
One girl i know (as a platonic friend) she's been with 3 or 4 relationships with sex, and never orgasmed. Talk about sucky.
Another chick, she was tiny, every guy she had sex with hurt so bad cause they were too big. I guess her "thing" is abnormally small. 🙂
Wouldn't that suck to marry someone like that and end up not making them happy in that department?
Would your love of GOD and each other overcome that? I dunno..
i mean thats cool if you want to get married a virgin, very noble, i wish the best of luck...
Amused
Elite Member
<< AmusedOne--The fact that you got none while you were married was YOUR problem(and your wife's) and does not apply to the bond of marriage itself. Go spill your bitterness elsewhere. >>
Elita, you can spill your feel-good platitudes all you want, but the fact is, in most marriages the sex cools considerably and the frequency dwindles dramatically in the first five years.
I'm not bitter, just honest.
take example from this lovely couple (taken from technicalvirgins.com):
<< JEREMY T., Holyoke, MA
I have to admit, when I first suggested anal sex to my girlfriend, she looked at me like I was crazy. I offered to double-wrap, use plenty of AstroGlide, but she was still totally freaked over the idea of it. Then she made a deal with me: If I'd bend over for her strap-on, she'd bend over for me. We take turns taking it up the poop chute, and now we finally feel like our relationship is fully equal. >>
🙂
<< JEREMY T., Holyoke, MA
I have to admit, when I first suggested anal sex to my girlfriend, she looked at me like I was crazy. I offered to double-wrap, use plenty of AstroGlide, but she was still totally freaked over the idea of it. Then she made a deal with me: If I'd bend over for her strap-on, she'd bend over for me. We take turns taking it up the poop chute, and now we finally feel like our relationship is fully equal. >>
🙂
<< Would your love of GOD and each other overcome that? I dunno.. >>
Yes it would, yes it can. Making a commitment to someone also means you work through difficulties such as you described, because you love eachother and want whats best for the other person. And there are solutions to those difficulties, you know. The idea of dumping someone just because they have different needs is utterly selfish and callous.
Also, I never said every woman has the same kind of needs; you also know NOTHING of mine so I don't even know how that came into play in this conversation.
I wish you luck in any major committed relationship you will have...Just for heaven's sake try to put your loved one first.
AmuseOne: Of course sex cools down. Does that mean it's all over? NOT by a long shot! There are tons of ways to spice up sex life. And when you do it for the person you love the most, it becomes that much more special. Sex is not just instinct.
GooberedUp
Senior member
<<
<< AmusedOne--The fact that you got none while you were married was YOUR problem(and your wife's) and does not apply to the bond of marriage itself. Go spill your bitterness elsewhere. >>
Elita, you can spill your feel-good platitudes all you want, but the fact is, in most marriages the sex cools considerably and the frequency dwindles dramatically in the first five years.
I'm not bitter, just honest. >>
I didn't find the cooling phenomenon to be time related as much as kid related. We had kids, and frequency went from about 5/week to about 2/week. That sucks.
Total Refected Power
Diamond Member
I have been married for over seven years and together for over 14. To think that sex is the "glue" or tips the balance for a successful marriage is naive. There are so many other things that make a marriage successful. Sex is a small component and if everything else is fine then it should be too.
Communication!!!!
i've heard of women out there that don't give bj's more than 2-3 times a week. WTF?
This statement is indicative of your view of relationships. There is much more involved than "getting off".
Communication!!!!
i've heard of women out there that don't give bj's more than 2-3 times a week. WTF?
This statement is indicative of your view of relationships. There is much more involved than "getting off".
StormRider
Diamond Member
Another chick, she was tiny, every guy she had sex with hurt so bad cause they were too big. I guess her "thing" is abnormally small.
Please introduce her to me. 😉 j/k. Or am I?!?! 😀 😱
Please introduce her to me. 😉 j/k. Or am I?!?! 😀 😱
Total Refected Power
Diamond Member
When my wife's best friend died, I was there for her.
When her sister lost a baby, I was there once again.
When we both were getting our PhD's we were there for each other.
When someone has a hard day at work we try to pick the other person up.
That's is what is the most important to me. Somebody who sticks by me in the tough times. While sex is wonderful, it is not the transforming factor of a relationship. Faith, trust, love and communcication is the foundation.
That said, we have a very healthy and happy sex life!!!! 🙂
When her sister lost a baby, I was there once again.
When we both were getting our PhD's we were there for each other.
When someone has a hard day at work we try to pick the other person up.
That's is what is the most important to me. Somebody who sticks by me in the tough times. While sex is wonderful, it is not the transforming factor of a relationship. Faith, trust, love and communcication is the foundation.
That said, we have a very healthy and happy sex life!!!! 🙂
StormRider
Diamond Member
<<dude you are so whack if you wait until marriage to have sex. Sex is a very important part of a relationship, and if you both aren't satisfied with your sex life, you'll seek better elsewhere..>>
I prefer the idea of waiting til marriage. Unless there is a gross size mismatch, I think all devoted couples can learn from each other and become good lovers in bed.
Also, has the thought occurred to anyone that if you've had a lot of sex partners before marriage, you get used to the thrill of being with someone new and need that feeling all the time? In other words, it makes it more likely that you'll be bored with whomever you are with.
I prefer the idea of waiting til marriage. Unless there is a gross size mismatch, I think all devoted couples can learn from each other and become good lovers in bed.
Also, has the thought occurred to anyone that if you've had a lot of sex partners before marriage, you get used to the thrill of being with someone new and need that feeling all the time? In other words, it makes it more likely that you'll be bored with whomever you are with.
Hmmmm.
My husband INSPIRES insatiable horniness in me.
When he treats me right, I get all tingly down there.
When he does the dishes, I have a hard time keeping my hands off him. If the kids aren't looking, I grab his butt and fondle him while he is in front of the sink. 🙂
When he respects my opinion even if he disagrees with it and when he stands up for me when people are unkind, I let him know if he wants it, I am there... anytime, anywhere.
Methinks that a good sex life after marriage has a lot more to do with the relationship than anything else.
My husband INSPIRES insatiable horniness in me.
When he treats me right, I get all tingly down there.
When he does the dishes, I have a hard time keeping my hands off him. If the kids aren't looking, I grab his butt and fondle him while he is in front of the sink. 🙂
When he respects my opinion even if he disagrees with it and when he stands up for me when people are unkind, I let him know if he wants it, I am there... anytime, anywhere.
Methinks that a good sex life after marriage has a lot more to do with the relationship than anything else.
I never had any intention to wait till I got married. Being the scorpio I am, I got tortured in high school looking at all these fine women and not having the gift of gab to get a taste. College came and well I still am hungry for more. Sex is different things to everyone and for me its just a hunger that needs to be satiated as much as possible. Of course you get the usual scares like uh oh, that rip wasnt there when I put it on..., or ummm what are those bumps? That usually will make anyone swear to abstain for awhile, until the next spring term comes rolling in and you see the large amounts of beautiful women wearing skirts.....
Anyway I agree with whoever said when I fall in love I will make love. Cause now I think I just sex women and not maek love to them. You cant make love with out love, thats like making rice without grain, bible without jesus, women without pms.
Anyway I agree with whoever said when I fall in love I will make love. Cause now I think I just sex women and not maek love to them. You cant make love with out love, thats like making rice without grain, bible without jesus, women without pms.
BoberFett
Lifer
I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Bad sex can kill a marriage.
By no means was sex the only problem in my marriage, but it was a big part of it, and kind of the beginning of the end. My wife had practically no sex drive. We started off with a bang, we had sex a whole ONE TIME on the honeymoon. After that we settled into a nice routine of once every week or two. When we did, it was barely worth the time or effort. Nothing but missionary. She seemed to prefer it if I kept quiet and finished as quickly as possible. Not that we could ever even discuss it, she didn't like to talk about sex. Terms such as "weird" and "gross" started being used when we did talk about it.
After 5 years of that bullsh!t (and the crumbling of the rest of our relationship) I decided I'd had enough, and started looking at what else was available. We're now in the process of divorce, and while it saddens me that it had to end up this way, I'm really looking forward to a future with a woman I can enjoy instead of one that I despise. I feel bad for her, she's been slapped pretty hard by reality (she was living a pretty charmed life while we were together) but she did bring it on herself. I gave her everything she could have wanted: a new house, a dog, a baby, she didn't have a job. And she couldn't bring herself to have sex with her husband more than every couple weeks.
Call me cruel. Call me an @sshole. I'm sure some of the self-righteous among you will. But in my position you'd have done the same thing.
Edit: For the waiting-for-marriage prone here, my wife and I didn't wait for marriage, but she was my first. I totally regret that. Had I been with other women, I don't think I'd have married her.
By no means was sex the only problem in my marriage, but it was a big part of it, and kind of the beginning of the end. My wife had practically no sex drive. We started off with a bang, we had sex a whole ONE TIME on the honeymoon. After that we settled into a nice routine of once every week or two. When we did, it was barely worth the time or effort. Nothing but missionary. She seemed to prefer it if I kept quiet and finished as quickly as possible. Not that we could ever even discuss it, she didn't like to talk about sex. Terms such as "weird" and "gross" started being used when we did talk about it.
After 5 years of that bullsh!t (and the crumbling of the rest of our relationship) I decided I'd had enough, and started looking at what else was available. We're now in the process of divorce, and while it saddens me that it had to end up this way, I'm really looking forward to a future with a woman I can enjoy instead of one that I despise. I feel bad for her, she's been slapped pretty hard by reality (she was living a pretty charmed life while we were together) but she did bring it on herself. I gave her everything she could have wanted: a new house, a dog, a baby, she didn't have a job. And she couldn't bring herself to have sex with her husband more than every couple weeks.
Call me cruel. Call me an @sshole. I'm sure some of the self-righteous among you will. But in my position you'd have done the same thing.
Edit: For the waiting-for-marriage prone here, my wife and I didn't wait for marriage, but she was my first. I totally regret that. Had I been with other women, I don't think I'd have married her.
Total Refected Power
Diamond Member
When he treats me right, I get all tingly down there.
Heh. My wife says "jumbled".
Heh. My wife says "jumbled".
love is something not physical. The only thing possible in material terms in sex. Now, if sex is the center-piece of your relationship, well, I guess your gonna be in a lot of relationship.
Don't tell me, as long as you get good sex, you'll be satsified. Same goes for money. Some ppl say as long as they make $500,000 a year, they will be happy. But once they make it, why not pursue $1,000,000 a year. Humans can't be satisfied wit only material things
Same goes for sex. Ppl always wanna experiment new stuff, try new stuff, watever. I see sex as the true meaning of love, and you don't get love until you commit to someone for the rest of your life.
static911
Don't tell me, as long as you get good sex, you'll be satsified. Same goes for money. Some ppl say as long as they make $500,000 a year, they will be happy. But once they make it, why not pursue $1,000,000 a year. Humans can't be satisfied wit only material things
Same goes for sex. Ppl always wanna experiment new stuff, try new stuff, watever. I see sex as the true meaning of love, and you don't get love until you commit to someone for the rest of your life.
static911
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