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For $1 million, would you...

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SlitheryDee

Nope. You guys watch the dicovery channel? As soon as one saw you, assuming that they spawn with the sole desire to kill you, you would be history.

There would be no "Hey there's a lion I think I'll run past this Abercrombie & Fitch and around the corner, up those stairs and climb an indoor palm tree. Then I'll be safe"

It would be more like "Hey there's a... "crunch* <incoherent screaming as the lion carries your flailing body away to devour it whole>"

 

pontifex

Lifer
Dec 5, 2000
43,806
44
91
Originally posted by: ebaycj
Originally posted by: TXHokie
Is there a SEARS in the mall? I'm sure I can rig up something from the Hardware dept (lawn motors, knifes, explosive chemicals = good times)

even easier would be a shitload of rat poison + any type of meat food from the food court..

either that or flammable aerosol + lighter.

another possibility would be to get a bunch of the demo grills (cooking grills not rapper grills), put them in a circle, and turn them on to the highest possible setting and hope to god they have enough fuel for 8 hours on maximum heat. i would bet that 500+ degrees would keep the lions away.
the poison option is the only viable option of the three.
the other 2 are completely ridiculous
 

Valhalla1

Diamond Member
Oct 13, 1999
8,678
0
76
id get into a big fridge or big washing machine in sears
or gas up a loud riding lawn mower and scare them off revving the engine (i hope)
 

Sqube

Diamond Member
Dec 23, 2004
3,078
1
0
The lions started knawing on that antelope(?) before it was even down, forget being injured or close to dead.

Yeah, I think I'll have to pass on that one. I value my entrails on the inside.
 

Jeff7

Lifer
Jan 4, 2001
41,599
17
81
Originally posted by: compnovice
Why not, if they are FEMALE lions they would be too busy shopping....
And they'd take twice as long to buy shoes.

Depends on the size of the mall. Some malls can fit inside a Walmart. Some could eat a Walmart alive.


The random spawn thing makes this dangerous. You could spawn in a really safe place and not have to move, like maybe in the air ventilation system somewhere. Or, that safe place could be dangerous if two lions spawn right next to you.
 

Valhalla1

Diamond Member
Oct 13, 1999
8,678
0
76
whats the criteria of the lion spawning ? Are they assured to spawn with their feet on the ground, or are they randomly distributed to any open-air space large enough to hold their volume ?

if so then theres little chance of one spawning next to you, and a higher chance it will spawn up in the air and drop to an injury-inducing fall, or spawn in the basement or air ducts or the dressing room of jc penny, etc. like someone said if you are allowed to be prepared with a lit torch and a long spear/sword (the OP said "you can use knives, bats etc" as if you can prepare yourself beforehand) then I don't see why your chance of survival isn't relatively high so you can work on building a defense before the lion who fell 3 stories in the air wakes up and hobbles over to u or the one manages to get out of the jc penny dressing room on the 2nd floor and down the escalator to you
 

KoolDrew

Lifer
Jun 30, 2004
10,226
1
71
I'd probably just find a way to climb up to the ceiling. They somtimes have exposed girders in malls. I'd just hang out up there.
That's exactly what I was thinking when reading the OP.

Why not, if they are FEMALE lions they would be too busy shopping....
:laugh:
 

Smartazz

Diamond Member
Dec 29, 2005
6,128
0
76
This needs a poll. This would be extremely thrilling. I'd do it as long as the mall was huge and there were no lions spawned near me. Maybe this is a good idea for a horror movie.
 

Valhalla1

Diamond Member
Oct 13, 1999
8,678
0
76
while not exactly lions, or shopping malls.. if you think this might make a good movie you might enjoy the "Cube" series of horror movies, the whole premise being escaping alive out of a mysterious booby trabbed cube shaped maze structure
 

EGGO

Diamond Member
Jul 29, 2004
5,505
1
0
Stand in the middle of the fountain. Cats hate water. :p

I'd probably try and Snake my way around them.
 

TSCrv

Senior member
Jul 11, 2005
568
0
0
to answer the origional question: at the moment i would not do it, but if i had done a good portion of everything i wanted to do in my life, then yes i would. its not so much the money that is drawing me in, it is the fact that i would have allready done everything i wanted to do, and i would be bored (but maybe too old to move around fast enough, but maybe wiser to work smarter against the lions)

if i did choose to stay for the challange i would have to assume that the mall is 1 floor, multiple wings, and all lions spawn on the floor, not being able to get killed by stupid placement. also my interpretation of what OP said about no doors, dressingrooms and related areas have doors, but lions can get through them if they suspect something. (no doors meaning a regular mall, u just cant get out).

doing the math with one of the local malls here which fit the criteria, 5-7 of the loins would spawn in stores, the rest would be in the general wide open area. if these lions have the instinct to work together then im dead automatically... gg reroll lion.. if not then i might have a chance lol.

even with a hardware store it would be hard to find something to fend off loins without p*ssing them off to charge you, basically you find anything lethal.... you might get lucky with a modded nailgun, or maybe a weed wacker... but essentially you would have to find a place to hide.... luckily in this mall they have palm trees (florida ftw, cept humidity), so i might be able to climb those, but with a bunch of lions after me cause im in a tree, they will eventuall knock it down, jump high enough to take an arm off, or knock me off...

a second choice would land me at sears again, with rope, something heavy, (or something to shoot the rope 30ft up, but i doubt i woudl be able to find something)... most malls have skylights, and all of the ones i have been to have steel beams visable near them, if you coudl throw a rope up there and hang urself up there (no grappeling hooks lol) then it would be gg lions go poof.. but then again, its that first 15 mins of getting up there which would let you live or not...

in the slim change i was able to do it... what now? i have $1m and nothing to spend it on, cept i have bragging rights...

any other partially doable plans of attack?
 

RaistlinZ

Diamond Member
Oct 15, 2001
7,629
9
91
BRAINSORM!!!

They should make this into a game show. But instead of using regular folk they should use convicted felons on death row. If they survive, they get the $1 milllion and their freedom, if they don't survive then nothing lost.

Each week could be a similar but different challege. You could call it, "8 Hours to Freedom". I'm sure a station like FOX would carry it. :p

On a similer note, does anyone remember the 1987 film The Running Man with Arnold Schwarzenegger?
 

cKGunslinger

Lifer
Nov 29, 1999
16,372
41
91
Originally posted by: RaistlinZ
BRAINSORM!!!

They should make this into a game show. But instead of using regular folk they should use convicted felons on death row. If they survive, they get the $1 milllion and their freedom, if they don't survive then nothing lost.

Each week could be a similar but different challege. You could call it, "8 Hours to Freedom". I'm sure a station like FOX would carry it. :p

On a similer note, does anyone remember the 1987 film The Running Man with Arnold Schwarzenegger?
 

amicold

Platinum Member
Feb 7, 2005
2,656
1
81
Originally posted by: jimbob200521
Spend a night (8 hours) in a large mall with 10 lions.

You start in the most central point of the mall, and the lions are instantly randomly "spawned" at 10 random locations in the mall..

There are no doors of any sort in this mall. Not even cupboard doors, so you can't lock yourself away.

These aren't the sort of lions you can make your friend by throwing them a piece of meat from the butchers.

On the 8th hour, lions instantly dissapear and you get the $1M.


HOLDUP!!!
You have no guns/crossbows!



You can use knives, baseball bats. Whatever, no firearms. You're alone in a locked up mall.

Remember, 10 fully grown female (more deadly than the males) WILD lions, who want to MESS YOU UP!

Edit: to clarify, all of the lions are spawned at the same time that you are. They are in random locations around the mall.
Female lions in a pack will fvck you up, hell no.
 

tfcmasta97

Platinum Member
Feb 7, 2004
2,003
0
0
isnt there still a ventilation system? also how big of a mall are we talkin here?

Im in Canada near Square One [second biggest mall in Canada, biggest in ontario] so like... its huuuge.
 

JustAnAverageGuy

Diamond Member
Aug 1, 2003
9,057
0
76
Originally posted by: Jeeebus
If the mall was made by EA, then chances are good that 3 of the lions would never be able to load, 4 would be randomly dropped once they spawn, and two would be immediately kicked by punkbuster... so assuming you paid $75 to download all the necessary updates, you'd only be up against one lion... for 5 minutes before the server crashed
Fixed that for you ;)

- JaAG
 

soydios

Platinum Member
Mar 12, 2006
2,708
0
0
I see only two ways that I would do this: 1.) You give me 90 seconds before the lions spawn, so I can get to the elevator, or 2.) you give me a shotgun and a box of 00 Buck shells.
 

senseamp

Lifer
Feb 5, 2006
35,025
5,107
126
Hell yeah, I would climb on top of one of those stands where they sell sunglasses or other useless cr@p, take a nap for 8 hours and then be rich!!!
 

jimbob200521

Diamond Member
Apr 15, 2005
4,108
29
91
Originally posted by: Smartazz
This needs a poll. This would be extremely thrilling. I'd do it as long as the mall was huge and there were no lions spawned near me. Maybe this is a good idea for a horror movie.
Poll added.
 

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