BeauJangles
Lifer
- Aug 26, 2001
- 13,941
- 1
- 0
BoomerD
No Lifer
- Feb 26, 2006
- 65,894
- 14,296
- 146
Yogi was a master at "malapropisms"...
I had the opportunity to see the 61 & 62 Yankees play in the old Yankee stadium (3 games)...Mantle, Maris, Berra, Ford, Richardson, Howard...what a team!
No one could butcher an Euphism like Yogi...
"It ain't over till it's over."
"You give 100% in the first half of the game, then in the second half, you give what's left."
This song is full of euphemisms. I linked to an AMV version because it's easier to understand than the live performances on youtube.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zIFq1Wzxzbs
One night me and the crew hit the road on a mission
To slurp free brew and go fuzzy flounder fishin'
Kayjees on the hi-fi and the keg was bottomless
Until we brought Skip O' Pot2mus
And Daddy's gonna get some probably underage and dumb
And everybody knows that the Daddy eats his young
Lupus in the lavatory making a big stink
Macing up the toilet seat and pooping in the sink
M.S.G.'s tanked up and wizzin' in a cup
Waiting for a sprinkle genie to come and drink it up
Cause I'm the one bottle willy with the 12 Horse Ale
After that I get silly like Soupy Sales
Now it's midnight and I'm completely boofy blitzed
A six of Shlitz and the Jew brew Manischewitz
With my beer-tinted glasses I'm ready to bitty battle
I'm Hungry Like The Wolf but I'll end up tending cattle
Cause you're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk)
Here she comes, a funky fried cutie
Mr. Jimmy Pop Ali is gonna get some booty
Cause I'm Mr. McFeelie with a speedy delivery
You'd think I was a ditch the way this chick was diggin' me
But maybe I should check and see if this is where I wanna be
Hey Lupus is she cute? Yea for a pygmie
Aw! What do you know? You're probably going home alone
And it wouldn't be the first time that I gave a dog a bone
Plus beauty, it's only skin deep
It's in the eye of the beholder and my beholder's about to tweak
I could tap that barrel, in fact I know I can
It's a ménage à trois you and me and Heineken
Cause you're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk)
Regrets I've had a few
First and foremost I'd like to mention you
For the sake of conversation we'll call you the Brand New Heavy
Your a mix between an Ugnaut and Eugene Levy
You can call it big-boned, I prefer to call it gut
You're Buddha you're Shamu you're Jabba the fuckin' Hutt
You had harpoon scars and your boobies were hairy
I smelt tuna melt but I wasn't gonna worry
It was 3 A.M. and I wasn't gettin' squat
So I rolled you up in flour and aimed it for the wet spot
I was buttering rolls like a soup kitchen Christian
Then it hit me something bit me while my little rod was fishin'
I was deep sea fishing I took a fat chance
But how was i supposed to know that Jabberjaws lived in your pants
At that junction I came to realize
That only Frank Purdue likes thighs that size
Fatty fatty boom ba latty I gotta lament
That you were not a girl you were an experiment
Cause you're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zIFq1Wzxzbs
One night me and the crew hit the road on a mission
To slurp free brew and go fuzzy flounder fishin'
Kayjees on the hi-fi and the keg was bottomless
Until we brought Skip O' Pot2mus
And Daddy's gonna get some probably underage and dumb
And everybody knows that the Daddy eats his young
Lupus in the lavatory making a big stink
Macing up the toilet seat and pooping in the sink
M.S.G.'s tanked up and wizzin' in a cup
Waiting for a sprinkle genie to come and drink it up
Cause I'm the one bottle willy with the 12 Horse Ale
After that I get silly like Soupy Sales
Now it's midnight and I'm completely boofy blitzed
A six of Shlitz and the Jew brew Manischewitz
With my beer-tinted glasses I'm ready to bitty battle
I'm Hungry Like The Wolf but I'll end up tending cattle
Cause you're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk)
Here she comes, a funky fried cutie
Mr. Jimmy Pop Ali is gonna get some booty
Cause I'm Mr. McFeelie with a speedy delivery
You'd think I was a ditch the way this chick was diggin' me
But maybe I should check and see if this is where I wanna be
Hey Lupus is she cute? Yea for a pygmie
Aw! What do you know? You're probably going home alone
And it wouldn't be the first time that I gave a dog a bone
Plus beauty, it's only skin deep
It's in the eye of the beholder and my beholder's about to tweak
I could tap that barrel, in fact I know I can
It's a ménage à trois you and me and Heineken
Cause you're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk)
Regrets I've had a few
First and foremost I'd like to mention you
For the sake of conversation we'll call you the Brand New Heavy
Your a mix between an Ugnaut and Eugene Levy
You can call it big-boned, I prefer to call it gut
You're Buddha you're Shamu you're Jabba the fuckin' Hutt
You had harpoon scars and your boobies were hairy
I smelt tuna melt but I wasn't gonna worry
It was 3 A.M. and I wasn't gettin' squat
So I rolled you up in flour and aimed it for the wet spot
I was buttering rolls like a soup kitchen Christian
Then it hit me something bit me while my little rod was fishin'
I was deep sea fishing I took a fat chance
But how was i supposed to know that Jabberjaws lived in your pants
At that junction I came to realize
That only Frank Purdue likes thighs that size
Fatty fatty boom ba latty I gotta lament
That you were not a girl you were an experiment
Cause you're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk)
"That's uglier than a cat's ass sewed up with a grape vine".
This is one of my grandfather's favorites, though it's not really a euphemism. The image it brings to mind is likely uglier than the thing being described.
A real euphemism that could fit in the same place might be, "It has visual character" or some such nonsense.
This is one of my grandfather's favorites, though it's not really a euphemism. The image it brings to mind is likely uglier than the thing being described.
A real euphemism that could fit in the same place might be, "It has visual character" or some such nonsense.
palswim
Golden Member
BoomerD
No Lifer
- Feb 26, 2006
- 65,894
- 14,296
- 146
Colder than a witch's tit
Colder than a well-diggers ass
Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey
Follow ugly home, ugly opens the door
He's so ugly, he had to tie a pork chop around his neck to get his dog to play with him.
Makin Bacon
Doin the horizontal bop
Slicker than snot/pig shit
The list goes on and on and on...why the list is longer than......................
Colder than a well-diggers ass
Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey
Follow ugly home, ugly opens the door
He's so ugly, he had to tie a pork chop around his neck to get his dog to play with him.
Makin Bacon
Doin the horizontal bop
Slicker than snot/pig shit
The list goes on and on and on...why the list is longer than......................
ConstipatedVigilante
Diamond Member
- Feb 22, 2006
- 7,670
- 1
- 0
BoomerD
No Lifer
- Feb 26, 2006
- 65,894
- 14,296
- 146
floating an air bisquit
Passin Gas
Taking a dump (wouldn't it be less messy to LEAVE a dump?)
Of course, you can create your own with:
http://www.walkingdead.net/perl/euphemism
Passin Gas
Taking a dump (wouldn't it be less messy to LEAVE a dump?)
Of course, you can create your own with:
http://www.walkingdead.net/perl/euphemism
MikeyIs4Dcats
Lifer
- Nov 5, 2001
- 18,366
- 3
- 0
MikeyIs4Dcats
Lifer
- Nov 5, 2001
- 18,366
- 3
- 0
Originally posted by: SViper
I'll drink to that one.I use it all the time.
Other gems:
Who pissed in your cheerios?
Don't get your tits tied in a knot.
Don't get your panties in a wad.
Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.
you don't understand what a euphemism is do you?
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