does it bother you when your wife doesnt want to work?

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jjones

Lifer
Oct 9, 2001
15,424
2
0
My wife worked up until the 8th month of her pregnancy, but hasn't worked in the 4 + years since then. It's okay with me. She takes care of our daughter and has lots of outside interests to keep her busy. She's a housewife in the traditional sense and that's just fine with me.

As for your wife, it would bother me a little but what would bother me more is her attitude about the puppy. If she's slack on that, what's it going to be like when you have a baby?
 

cerebusPu

Diamond Member
May 27, 2000
4,008
0
0
Originally posted by: rudder
Originally posted by: TheGoodGuy
let me guess you guys are both under 25, more so about 21/22.. if so this is VERY usual among women in the military. You sure she not cheating on you??

I second that. I lived overseas on a military base for several years. I would be banned if I talked about some of the crap that went on.

so whats the story again?
 

sounds like she is having other issues
she's probably not happy with the current location and situation...getting a job gets mentally linked to growing a root

is she american? or immigrant?

My wife is filipino and didn't want a job for about the first year or so. As soon as we moved to california she started job hunting though.
We've now moved back, and she has worked at two different firms. Now she stays at home taking care of the kids and running her online businesses.
 

Nitemare

Lifer
Feb 8, 2001
35,461
4
81
If she gives you poon, has a hot meal ready amd keeps a clean house then what are you complaining about?

If not, introduce her to the curb.
 

KingPhil

Golden Member
Apr 27, 2000
1,154
0
0
Needs to stay home to take care of an F$%#ng 6 month old puppy? WTF? Crate the dog during the day and get your a$$ to work.

Dog should be house broken by now so it should be even able to hold the poop and pee till you get home to let it out.

My guess is she's having fun with the army boys......... too busy to work :) Dog is a bad excuse........

Just kiddin......... fight on......
 

tami

Lifer
Nov 14, 2004
11,588
3
81
i got married three months ago. i didn't have a job when i got married and i knew it would be essential to take a month or two off just to settle in (be home with furniture was delivered, etc). that said, i knew that i was not going to put the brunt of the work on my husband and didn't want him to be the sole carrier of the financial burden. i care too much about him to participate in such a thing.

finding a job has been difficult, but throughout the rejections and the near promises (and even a few offers that were not particularly ideal for various reasons), i didn't give up and landed myself a job finally after a considerable amount of time.

for me, yeah, it would be ideal to be "lazy" all day and not have to worry about having to report into an office every day from 8:30-5 (and then some), but is that fair to be completely dependent on my husband and not have to contribute financially to the relationship? of course not.
 

dawks

Diamond Member
Oct 9, 1999
5,071
2
81
Originally posted by: Yossarian
Originally posted by: alkemyst
It really depends on the situation.

In your case I am sure she likes being surrounded by friends on the base. That would cause me a problem just from my own knowledge what I'd do with that.

My wife is working 8 hours a day in a crappy job. She won't apply to the jobs that my family and I have dropped at her feet (doubling her pay scale, she is not making minimun wage, but in Japan she made $7k USD a month....)

She is a coward. That said, it's up to me to decide if I am accepting it or not. I think though, it may be her decision when I buy a house (I am looking now) and she is not on the loan or deeds.

The funny part is I worked from home before, making way more than her, but she said it was a lazy job....no benefits, etc...so I went back to private sector on the statement once I got a better job, then she would....that was over a year ago....I just recieved a $5,200 raise. Her job causes me aggravation, she will get scheduled to show up at 5:30am with a phone call at 10pm and accepts it.

I think my own agreement that she pays $300 a month is working against me. Considering her health is $104, vision is $3, dental is $17, I pay her cell phone $52, car insurance of about $100, and $300 in groceries a month...add in rent, electric, the phone/cable, etc she is costing me more than she contributes to live here.

So the bottom line is if you are not happy with it you must do something. I think when I buy a house without her she may see the light.

you sound like you treat your marriage as a business transaction.


Yup, this is pretty bad.. Sounds like hes lucky its lasted as long as it has.
 

PingSpike

Lifer
Feb 25, 2004
21,758
603
126
So you work like 12 hours a day, her reason for not getting a job is so she can "take care of the puppy" and when you get home she wants you to clean up the puppy piss?

Tell her next time she asks you to clean up the puppy piss, you're taking it to the pound.
 

aries2k1

Member
Dec 24, 2003
46
0
0
*update*

told the wife how i felt and we were able to work it out....she applied for a job today...as for her blaming the job thing on the dog..part of that was my fault since i was pretty pissed at the time...she only blamed it on the dog once...

i told her that if she stayed home all the time...shed eventually get bored and cheat on me so i wanted her to be busy...well, she replied that by applying for a job on base..she'd meet a lot more people than if she stayed at home...mmmmkk...

now i gotta worry about people hittin on her...its a never ending cycle -_- ...j/k

 

Geekbabe

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
Oct 16, 1999
32,229
2,539
126
www.theshoppinqueen.com
Originally posted by: aries2k1
*update*

told the wife how i felt and we were able to work it out....she applied for a job today...as for her blaming the job thing on the dog..part of that was my fault since i was pretty pissed at the time...she only blamed it on the dog once...

i told her that if she stayed home all the time...shed eventually get bored and cheat on me so i wanted her to be busy...well, she replied that by applying for a job on base..she'd meet a lot more people than if she stayed at home...mmmmkk...

now i gotta worry about people hittin on her...its a never ending cycle -_- ...j/k


You actually sat there and told your wife to get a job because you figured she'd cheat on you if she isn't working ?

Lol, that is totally over the top !
 

eLiu

Diamond Member
Jun 4, 2001
6,407
1
0
Originally posted by: notfred
If I were in your situation, it wouldn't bother me IF I came home to a spotless house and a hot meal every day.

But she's complaining about the puppy? WTF? She does nothing else, it should ALWAYS be her turn to clean up after the damn dog.

*ding*

Seriously if she likes staying home & keeping house/doing yardwork/whatever, that's great as long as you guys aren't pressed for $$. But then house-matters are *her* *job*, and hers alone. You already have a job...help if you have time, otherwise you've done your part.
 

aries2k1

Member
Dec 24, 2003
46
0
0
[/quote]
You actually sat there and told your wife to get a job because you figured she'd cheat on you if she isn't working ?

Lol, that is totally over the top !
[/quote]


i was being sarcastic to her! she knows when im serious
 

JackBurton

Lifer
Jul 18, 2000
15,993
14
81
Originally posted by: Geekbabe
Originally posted by: aries2k1
*update*

told the wife how i felt and we were able to work it out....she applied for a job today...as for her blaming the job thing on the dog..part of that was my fault since i was pretty pissed at the time...she only blamed it on the dog once...

i told her that if she stayed home all the time...shed eventually get bored and cheat on me so i wanted her to be busy...well, she replied that by applying for a job on base..she'd meet a lot more people than if she stayed at home...mmmmkk...

now i gotta worry about people hittin on her...its a never ending cycle -_- ...j/k


You actually sat there and told your wife to get a job because you figured she'd cheat on you if she isn't working ?

Lol, that is totally over the top !

Yeah dude, not a good move. Are you missing the basic filter in your brain that keeps EVERYTHING from blurting out? You DON'T say that to your girl friend/wife. Good God!
 

JackBurton

Lifer
Jul 18, 2000
15,993
14
81
Originally posted by: aries2k1
You actually sat there and told your wife to get a job because you figured she'd cheat on you if she isn't working ?

Lol, that is totally over the top !
[/quote]


i was being sarcastic to her! she knows when im serious
[/quote]

You were being sarcastic but you weren't, right? Man, I wouldn't even bring that up jokingly.
 

JulesMaximus

No Lifer
Jul 3, 2003
74,584
985
126
Nope...I can't fault her for not wanting the same things I don't want.

We both work even though we don't want to. :(
 

aries2k1

Member
Dec 24, 2003
46
0
0
Originally posted by: JackBurton
Originally posted by: aries2k1
You actually sat there and told your wife to get a job because you figured she'd cheat on you if she isn't working ?

Lol, that is totally over the top !


i was being sarcastic to her! she knows when im serious
[/quote]

You were being sarcastic but you weren't, right? Man, I wouldn't even bring that up jokingly.[/quote]

when youre with someone long enough u get a better understanding of how they think....although sometimes its difficult to communicate with your girl...but we joke about a lot of things some people might want to avoid..