Do you ask people how much they make?

[Atty]

I recently got a new job and every time people find out that I'm working somewhere new the first question is, "How much do you make there?"

Maybe its just me but I find it a bit of a rude question to ask how much someone makes. I could understand asking if its paying better than my last job (I left a very respected company, in this area at least, Publix Supermarkets) or if I'm getting better benefits from them but even when I avoid the question of my salary people keep asking. And it isn't just limited to my group of friends (anywhere from 18-early 30's) but old managers, friends parents, etc.

Maybe I'm just odd but I could care less how much someone makes.

 

[Ns1]

the answer is always "not enough"

yes it's rude

 

[SlitheryDee]

Depends on who's asking I guess. If I'm worried that the question will eventually result in someone asking me for money I just lie.

 

[Blackjack200]

The only time I answered that question was when my mother asked it. I didn't even like it then, but she's my mom, so I told her. The only other way I would do it is if I got to the point in a relationship where it's time to "open the books".

Yes, it's rude to ask; and yes, people will ask anyway. The best way to answer is to say something like 'oh, they treat me pretty well there'. If they keep pressing then you know they have very little in the way of manners.

 

[rcpratt]

I must admit I'm often curious what people make, but I never ask. My real close friends know what I make (and I them), just because it comes up and we're all comfortable with it. And my parents pretty much know because I told them about all of my offers when I graduated. But I've known what my Dad makes since I was probably 16, so...

 

[moshquerade]

I recently got a new job and every time people find out that I'm working somewhere new the first question is, "How much do you make there?"

Maybe its just me but I find it a bit of a rude question to ask how much someone makes. I could understand asking if its paying better than my last job (I left a very respected company, in this area at least, Publix Supermarkets) or if I'm getting better benefits from them but even when I avoid the question of my salary people keep asking. And it isn't just limited to my group of friends (anywhere from 18-early 30's) but old managers, friends parents, etc.

Maybe I'm just odd but I could care less how much someone makes.

Hmmmm... I have never encountered someone asking me "how much do you make there". NOYFB, comes to mind.

 

[Josh123]

I think it's kind of rude to ask people anything that involves how much they paid or earn with anything.

 

[Squisher]

It is rude and I never ask.

However, people are blabber mouths and it's amazing how you can use this information, if they are coworkers, when you're asking for a raise.

 

[TridenT]

I must admit I'm often curious what people make, but I never ask. My real close friends know what I make (and I them), just because it comes up and we're all comfortable with it. And my parents pretty much know because I told them about all of my offers when I graduated. But I've known what my Dad makes since I was probably 16, so...

I've known what my parents made since I was a kid. How you managed to be so ignorant up to 16 is astonishing.

I don't think it's rude. I think it's just worth knowing. Gives more perspective on how to view the person.

 

[rcpratt]

I've known what my parents made since I was a kid. How you managed to be so ignorant up to 16 is astonishing.

Or maybe I just didn't care?

 

[Mr. Pedantic]

FFS, it's I COULDN'T CARE LESS.

I don't really care. I won't specialize based on pay, and there are lots of things more important to me than just how much money I make.

Or maybe I just didn't care?

Don't worry, putting people down here is his way of trying to compensate for real life.

 

[AreaCode707]

I don't mind sharing with close friends, it can help everyone's career development if we compare notes on skills and pay ranges. However, those discussions are always prefaced with, "if you don't mind me asking" from whoever initiates.

Non-close friends, I would be very WTF and decline to provide any info.

I had a teammate ask me once right after I started and that was VERY uncomfortable. Said I didn't talk about that stuff and he kinda looked at me and said, "...oh. Well, I'll tell you mine." I was SO glad I didn't share anything, because it turned out he made half what I did (we had totally different skill sets and responsibilities but he wasn't really clear on what I did so that wouldn't have meant a lot to him.)

 

[Ns1]

I don't think it's rude.

of course you don't. but it is.

 

[Eli]

I'm often curious, but I would only ask if they're a close friend and we're on that level, or the subject comes up or something.

If someone asks me, I'll happily share though. I don't care, and have always found workplace rules forbidding such discussions to be silly(though I certainly understand the reasoning behind such policies).

 

[GotIssues]

It is rude to ask what someone makes. If you volunteer the information, that's fine and cool, but one should never flat out ask you.

I have a mix of friends. A couple that will matter of factly state it out of the blue, one that states it to try to brag about how much he makes (which is funny, because he makes jack shit compared to the rest of us), and the white collar workers who don't talk about it. The ones that share the information willingly are the ones that always ask, and the response is always "I do ok." Keeps it vague so they don't know, and sends the message that I'm not going to tell them.

 

[rcpratt]

Don't worry, putting people down here is his way of trying to compensate for real life.

I'm not too concerned about what TridenT, of all people, thinks.

 

[dud]

Absolutely not. This is a great way to get fired ...

 

[Cookie]

My ex's friends used to ask me all the time. It might have been a cultural thing that they thought it was no big deal to ask. I never told them how much, but they would continue to ask.

At work everyone knows, it's public record.

 

[Imp]

I recognize that it's a sensitive subject, but will ask most friends how much they make. It's not like I'll pillage your house and blackmail your ass. "OMFG, yous a loser, yous no make da moneys!"

 

[vshah]

If someone asks, I don't mind sharing, as long as it isn't someone at my company.

I don't ask anyone other than close friends, and that too only if it comes up in a conversation.

 

[GotIssues]

I recognize that it's a sensitive subject, but will ask most friends how much they make. It's not like I'll pillage your house and blackmail your ass. "OMFG, yous a loser, yous no make da moneys!"

It's not that people are worried you are going to rob them, it's just that it's none of your business. If it's cool in your circle of friends, that's fine. But most people don't want to talk about their finances with people who don't NEED to know.

Do you ask your female friend when their time of the month is?

 

[TridenT]

It's not that people are worried you are going to rob them, it's just that it's none of your business. If it's cool in your circle of friends, that's fine. But most people don't want to talk about their finances with people who don't NEED to know.

Do you ask your female friend when their time of the month is?

The bolded is usually something I don't think of. Knowing what someone makes allows you to say, "No, you can easily afford that. You just don't want it. Stop lyin', asshole."

 

[KidNiki1]

I think it's just worth knowing. Gives more perspective on how to view the person.

:thumbsdown::thumbsdown::thumbsdown:

it's rude.

the answer is an uncomfortable 5-7 second silent stare at the person.

unless its someone you really dont mind telling like a close friend.

 

[Ns1]

The bolded is usually something I don't think of. Knowing what someone makes allows you to say, "No, you can easily afford that. You just don't want it. Stop lyin', asshole."

except you only asked about revenues, not expenses. so don't make assumptions, asshole.

 

[TridenT]

except you only asked about revenues, not expenses. so don't make assumptions. asshole.

You can make assumptions on expenses quite easily if you know anything about the person. You can also make assumptions that if the person has expenses that are too large to afford X item with Y revenue then they are probably bad with finances to begin with. If they have any brains they won't spend everything they have every month IF they have sufficient income. (For instance, I have to spend all I have pretty much every month because I don't have enough income to save) As well, if the person is not a complete dumbass they wouldn't get a 3 bedroom apartment in NYC all to themselves with a non-ridiculously-high income. One can keep getting more perspective on the personality of the person through what they own, don't own, rent, don't rent, and earn.