Dads: Offer advice for the Delivery Room/Prep

[Patt]

Originally posted by: Geekbabe

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: Geekbabe
go out to the bar with your male relatives and friends... seriously.

Only if I'm wanting to get divorced ...

I had 3 kids, if I had it to do over the only person there would have been a female relative or a friend.

An interesting perspective ... but if my wife told me I wasn't welcome in the room, I'd have to reconsider my marriage.

 

[Armitage]

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: Geekbabe

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: Geekbabe
go out to the bar with your male relatives and friends... seriously.

Only if I'm wanting to get divorced ...

I had 3 kids, if I had it to do over the only person there would have been a female relative or a friend.

An interesting perspective ... but if my wife told me I wasn't welcome in the room, I'd have to reconsider my marriage.

Some women are of the opinion that babies are their responsibility alone - once you've planted the seed your job is simply to keep the cabinets stocked and a roof overhead. It doesn't fit their idea of male/female roles for dad to be involved in the birth or early parenting. Some guys are ok with that. Sounds absurd and unbelievable to me - but I've known two couples like this.

 

[Geekbabe]

Originally posted by: Armitage

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: Geekbabe

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: Geekbabe
go out to the bar with your male relatives and friends... seriously.

Only if I'm wanting to get divorced ...

I had 3 kids, if I had it to do over the only person there would have been a female relative or a friend.

An interesting perspective ... but if my wife told me I wasn't welcome in the room, I'd have to reconsider my marriage.

Some women are of the opinion that babies are their responsibility alone - once you've planted the seed your job is simply to keep the cabinets stocked and a roof overhead. It doesn't fit their idea of male/female roles for dad to be involved in the birth or early parenting. Some guys are ok with that. Sounds absurd and unbelievable to me - but I've known two couples like this.

A lot of otherwise very nice men become unbelievably annoying control freak PITA's in the labor/delivery room.

 

[Bryophyte]

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: Geekbabe

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: Geekbabe
go out to the bar with your male relatives and friends... seriously.

Only if I'm wanting to get divorced ...

I had 3 kids, if I had it to do over the only person there would have been a female relative or a friend.

An interesting perspective ... but if my wife told me I wasn't welcome in the room, I'd have to reconsider my marriage.

She's very bitter and she divorced that guy. She's said on here more than a few times that he was a lousy spouse.

 

[Patt]

Originally posted by: Armitage

Some women are of the opinion that babies are their responsibility alone - once you've planted the seed your job is simply to keep the cabinets stocked and a roof overhead. It doesn't fit their idea of male/female roles for dad to be involved in the birth or early parenting. Some guys are ok with that. Sounds absurd and unbelievable to me - but I've known two couples like this.

I'm certainly not OK with that, and know that isn't the way my wife feels anyway. If anything she wants me to be involved with 100% of the activities. In our household there really aren't male/female roles. I cook, clean the bathroom, do renovations and cut the lawn. She cooks, cleans and does renovations and cuts the lawn. The only thing we don't see me doing in terms of responsibilities is breast-feeding, and even then, I'm responsible for her nutritional requirements so things go as smoothly as possible.

 

[Geekbabe]

Originally posted by: Bryophyte

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: Geekbabe

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: Geekbabe
go out to the bar with your male relatives and friends... seriously.

Only if I'm wanting to get divorced ...

I had 3 kids, if I had it to do over the only person there would have been a female relative or a friend.

An interesting perspective ... but if my wife told me I wasn't welcome in the room, I'd have to reconsider my marriage.

She's very bitter and she divorced that guy. She's said on here more than a few times that he was a lousy spouse.

I've heard more than one story about husband's SO's acting in ways that caused their partners to lose respect for them in the delivery room.

Bitter ? no, realist ? yes !

 

[Armitage]

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: Armitage

Some women are of the opinion that babies are their responsibility alone - once you've planted the seed your job is simply to keep the cabinets stocked and a roof overhead. It doesn't fit their idea of male/female roles for dad to be involved in the birth or early parenting. Some guys are ok with that. Sounds absurd and unbelievable to me - but I've known two couples like this.

I'm certainly not OK with that, and know that isn't the way my wife feels anyway. If anything she wants me to be involved with 100% of the activities. In our household there really aren't male/female roles. I cook, clean the bathroom, do renovations and cut the lawn. She cooks, cleans and does renovations and cuts the lawn. The only thing we don't see me doing in terms of responsibilities is breast-feeding, and even then, I'm responsible for her nutritional requirements so things go as smoothly as possible.

Sounds like you understand each other then :thumbsup:
That's the way I see it also - or did until my divorce (which had nothing to do with this subject). I've just known some couples who took the Leave it to Beaver caricature of sex roles to extremes. If both parties are on board with that - shrug - whatever works. It's not for me.

 

[Patt]

Originally posted by: Geekbabe

Originally posted by: Bryophyte
She's very bitter and she divorced that guy. She's said on here more than a few times that he was a lousy spouse.

I've heard more than one story about husband's SO's acting in ways that caused their partners to lose respect for them in the delivery room.

Bitter ? no, realist ? yes !

I'm sure that this happens, I have no doubt of it as a matter of fact. Despite that, the benefit of the doubt should be given to anyone that hasn't gone through it once. If I'm a dick in the delivery room for whatever reason, I'd expect to not be asked back if there is another instance. I'm sorry you had a difficult time with your partner, but believe me, I'm hoping to fill whatever need my wife has.

 

[Geekbabe]

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: Geekbabe

Originally posted by: Bryophyte
She's very bitter and she divorced that guy. She's said on here more than a few times that he was a lousy spouse.

I've heard more than one story about husband's SO's acting in ways that caused their partners to lose respect for them in the delivery room.

Bitter ? no, realist ? yes !

I'm sure that this happens, I have no doubt of it as a matter of fact. Despite that, the benefit of the doubt should be given to anyone that hasn't gone through it once. If I'm a dick in the delivery room for whatever reason, I'd expect to not be asked back if there is another instance. I'm sorry you had a difficult time with your partner, but believe me, I'm hoping to fill whatever need my wife has.

just don't put her in a position where she has to interceed for/cartake for or otherwise monitor you. Towards the end don't get offended if she acts like you aren't even there btw, when you transition over from labor to the pushing stafe it's just the woman and her body at that point,it's that intense physically.

 

[Fritzo]

Originally posted by: rudder
Do you have relatives nearby? The nurses will not let any one in the room if you ask. Seems rude, but it is a special time. My wifes family getting coming in and my wife was doing a natural pregnancy. They just would not get the message to leave. The nurses don't have a problem pushing people out the door.

I had a problem with this where my mom and wife's mom stayed in during the birth. I didn't have the heart to tell them to leave, but my wife was really uncomfortable with mostly my mom being in there. Tricky situation that you'll want to think about ahead of time.

 

[Fritzo]

Wow. After hearing about all this stuff and the pooping and the actual labor and fluids and such, I dont think there is anything beautiful about the actual labor. Magical, yes. Beautiful, no.

But what do I know, I dont have a kid yet.

Yeah...it ain't pretty. Picture a catcher's mitt full of lasagna. That's about as close as you'll get to the scene.

 

[MasonLuke]

Have a bag set and near the door just incase you have to "run out" of the house. in that bag, you should have things you would take if you were staying at a motel for a day or 2. also in that you should have bottled water and plenty of snacks.

In the delivery room, please be patient confident and in control at all times. you wife will be scared shitless and you need to be there for her. the process is long and tedious, but she will need your undivided attention.

During delivery, do not stand behind the doctor and "look" i recommmend you stand next to her facing the doctor so all you see is when the baby "pops" his head.

Congratulations and take care. Oh, dont forget your camera and video camera for the moments right after birth.

 

[Patt]

Originally posted by: Geekbabe

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: Geekbabe

Originally posted by: Bryophyte
She's very bitter and she divorced that guy. She's said on here more than a few times that he was a lousy spouse.

I've heard more than one story about husband's SO's acting in ways that caused their partners to lose respect for them in the delivery room.

Bitter ? no, realist ? yes !

I'm sure that this happens, I have no doubt of it as a matter of fact. Despite that, the benefit of the doubt should be given to anyone that hasn't gone through it once. If I'm a dick in the delivery room for whatever reason, I'd expect to not be asked back if there is another instance. I'm sorry you had a difficult time with your partner, but believe me, I'm hoping to fill whatever need my wife has.

just don't put her in a position where she has to interceed for/cartake for or otherwise monitor you. Towards the end don't get offended if she acts like you aren't even there btw, when you transition over from labor to the pushing stafe it's just the woman and her body at that point,it's that intense physically.

Great advice ... also what my mother told me at one point. I know it has nothing physically to do with me, and I will be there as a supporter. The moment I found myself becoming an obstacle for whatever reason, I'd remove myself from the proceedings. I'm not easily offended anyway, so I'm not worried about being ignored

 

[Fritzo]

Sorry for the shotgun posting, but I just remembered something very important!!!

During contractions, the woman will grab onto the first thing in arms reach and SQUEEZE!!!!!!! MAKE SURE YOUR GROIN AREA IN NO WHERE NEAR HER HANDS WHEN THEN HAPPENS!!!!

I'm speaking from exerience here, and I was never the same afterwards :shocked: Hospital beds have those metal rail things...I suggest you use them as a shield.

 

[Patt]

Originally posted by: Fritzo
Sorry for the shotgun posting, but I just remembered something very important!!!

During contractions, the woman will grab onto the first thing in arms reach and SQUEEZE!!!!!!! MAKE SURE YOUR GROIN AREA IN NO WHERE NEAR HER HANDS WHEN THEN HAPPENS!!!!

I'm speaking from exerience here, and I was never the same afterwards :shocked: Hospital beds have those metal rail things...I suggest you use them as a shield.

Thanks for the advice ... maybe I'll wear my cup

 

[HomeBrewerDude]

When she starts squeezing the easycheeze out of your hand, you should squeeze back twice as hard!



Seriously though, be flexible, and let nature take its course... do not go in thinking that you're going to have the baby a certain way (e.g., natural) because you might find yourself in a situation that is unexpected.

 

[krunchykrome]

I can't wait to have a little guy.

 

[Patt]

Originally posted by: krunchykrome
I can't wait to have a little guy.

Me either ... or little girl.

We don't know what is coming out yet ... I can't even imagine how amazing it is going to be.

 

[Electric Amish]

Stay home, crack a beer and put your feet up. It will be the last time you ever will.

 

[rudder]

Originally posted by: RKS
I am not sure about Canada but here we got two nights at the hospital before eviction. You may have the option of keeping the baby in the room or nursery. Let the pros keep the baby. It is a lot less worry and you will need all the sleep you can get.

The mother is the pro. At least here in the U.S. they keep the baby in the nursery for mintoring but it is brought to the mother every 2 hours or so for feeding. And remember breast is best!

 

[HomeBrewerDude]

Originally posted by: rudder

Originally posted by: RKS
I am not sure about Canada but here we got two nights at the hospital before eviction. You may have the option of keeping the baby in the room or nursery. Let the pros keep the baby. It is a lot less worry and you will need all the sleep you can get.

The mother is the pro. At least here in the U.S. they keep the baby in the nursery for mintoring but it is brought to the mother every 2 hours or so for feeding. And remember breast is best!

and cheaper... my wife has saved us over 4000 dollars with her mammies!

 

[Patt]

Originally posted by: rudder

Originally posted by: RKS
I am not sure about Canada but here we got two nights at the hospital before eviction. You may have the option of keeping the baby in the room or nursery. Let the pros keep the baby. It is a lot less worry and you will need all the sleep you can get.

The mother is the pro. At least here in the U.S. they keep the baby in the nursery for mintoring but it is brought to the mother every 2 hours or so for feeding. And remember breast is best!

We're removed from the hospital pretty quickly if there are no complications, especially as I'm in a small town and there aren't a lot of hospital beds to go around. Most folks are home within 24-48 hours with the little one!

We are planning on breastfeeding ... and I use we in the most loose context there

 

[RKS]

Originally posted by: Patt

Originally posted by: rudder

Originally posted by: RKS
I am not sure about Canada but here we got two nights at the hospital before eviction. You may have the option of keeping the baby in the room or nursery. Let the pros keep the baby. It is a lot less worry and you will need all the sleep you can get.

The mother is the pro. At least here in the U.S. they keep the baby in the nursery for mintoring but it is brought to the mother every 2 hours or so for feeding. And remember breast is best!

We're removed from the hospital pretty quickly if there are no complications, especially as I'm in a small town and there aren't a lot of hospital beds to go around. Most folks are home within 24-48 hours with the little one!

We are planning on breastfeeding ... and I use we in the most loose context there

The 1st time around with nursing my wife had a very difficult time with our boy latching on. Tell your wife not to get discouraged if it doesn't work immediately since I don't think it works as 'naturally' as they make it seem. I believe most hospitals have lactation consultants to help women get started. We even went in every week to make sure that the little one was getting enough milk and gaining weight. And as stated nursing is the best for the baby as well as your wallet.

 

[whistleclient]

Run.

Run now.