- Jun 19, 2003
- 23,454
- 41
- 91
The cards have revealed the depths of your lungs. I see little bits of them coming up slowly, but then it really won't matter because of that goddamn semi.
- Jun 19, 2003
- 23,454
- 41
- 91
The stars are speaking of a disastrous end to the True Night Crew when PM4E comes back and while making his takeover speech, is accidentally disemboweled by your Pit Bull. Unfortunatly, the police don't believe you. On the plus side, members of the NC visit you in prison for the next 24 years.
- Jun 19, 2003
- 23,454
- 41
- 91
The crystal ball has clouded over making it difficult to see, however, this much is clear. You will really regret ever telling Nik what "penis" was in French.
- Jun 19, 2003
- 23,454
- 41
- 91
- Jun 19, 2003
- 23,454
- 41
- 91
- Jun 19, 2003
- 23,454
- 41
- 91
The tarot cards reveal that you wrote a story about your best friend in college and that you had somebody proofread it. Unfortunatly, this is where your fortune ends and no amount of shuffling the cards will change it.
Hope you get something out of this.
- Jun 19, 2003
- 23,454
- 41
- 91
My crystal ball nearly fell off the stand when I consulted, however, it is very clear that that one night stand with Elton John will haunt your life for years if not decades.
- Jun 19, 2003
- 23,454
- 41
- 91
The Norse Gods have imparted the fact that your obsession with the final battle that will occur outside of Valhalla will involve your mother and your real father, whom you will not actually meet for another 27 years. The sad part is that you will actually only know him for about 45 mins before he has to go fight at Valhalla.
- Jun 19, 2003
- 23,454
- 41
- 91
- Jun 19, 2003
- 23,454
- 41
- 91
Didn't you read it? You get to meet your Dad in 27 years. For 45 mins. Want more? PLS INSERT KOIN.
- Jun 19, 2003
- 23,454
- 41
- 91
The stars revealed the numbers to me, however, they said you are a self-serving, greedy asshole who will take the money and divorce your wife and tell your own mom to go check into a nursing home, therefore they instructed me not to tell you. And since I am not self-serving, I won't use them either.
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