hypothetically speaking..if you're a girl, and a guy invites you over to his place and asks you to study..should you be cautious that he wants to do more than just study? i mean, i'm sure most of you guys here are nice and innocent, based on lots of posts that i've read..but i'm wary that not all guys out there are as altruistic as you all may be..
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College guys: how trustworthy are they?
- Thread starter MiataGirl
- Start date
It's an iffy question.
Personally, I've asked several girls to meet at my place or the library to study without the thought of anything more even coming close to entering my mind. I don't work that way.
If a guy asks a girl over to his place to study, she's better off by countering with "why don't we go to a coffee shop or the library?" or suggest some other public place.
Personally, I've asked several girls to meet at my place or the library to study without the thought of anything more even coming close to entering my mind. I don't work that way.
If a guy asks a girl over to his place to study, she's better off by countering with "why don't we go to a coffee shop or the library?" or suggest some other public place.
Kerouactivist
Diamond Member
If you don't like this guy on a more than just want to study and maybe be friends level, maybe you should see if it would be alright if you met him at the library or Barnes & Nobles or something along those lines.
depends on the guy. but if you don't know him well enough to feel safe judging, why not suggest an alternate meeting place. say you need coffee to study or something 🙂
and if he does make any unwelcome moves (more than just expressing interest) or your intuition tells you something is wrong, get out of there!
heh, yeah. More like, '1 out of 4 girls at Ole Miss get sloppy ass drunk and don't remember enthusiastically volunteering for a DP. The return of sobriety also marks the return of the inhibitions to and shame of engaging in such behavior, they almost cannot believe they did it, so instead of having to face the consequences of their own horrible judgement, they pretend it did not happen consentually.'
I saw that happen a dozen times.
College guys are no more or no less criminal than the general male population.
often colleges do not enforce rules that would get you arrested or axe murdered elsewhere. I know a lot of women who have been raped on campuses, and they were not necessarily drunk. things get swept under the rug, or women are too scared/embarrased/ashamed to talk about it.
Chaotic42
Lifer
I don't doubt that this is the case in some of the allegations. From what I've heard, the rape test for women is terribly traumatic. Not something to put yourself through unless you were serious.
At any rate, you should always be careful in situations like these. Rules are more lax in colleges, and especially at schools like Ole Miss, some things are kept in the closet.
I wouldn't trust ONE college guy (despite the fact i'm still one), but i ESPECIALLY wouldn't trust a frat boy. They will do anything for each other (as brothers), including whatever it takes to get in your pants. My second to last alcoholic sorority-girlfriend was raped twice...both by frat boys. She got one of them suspended for a year from the school, only for him to come back and move RIGHT ABOVE her in her apartment complex. She demanded that she move out that day. It was nuts.
-=bmacd=-
-=bmacd=-
Why don't you counter-offer and suggest studying in the library? See how it goes a few times studying over there and then you can move the studying to his place or your place after you feel more comfortable with the situation. Be cautious, but don't be paranoid.
And no, not 100% of the guy population is only after one thing. There are those of us out there who are not in a hurry - if there's a potential for a good relationship. Actually, when I was dating the woman that I married, she confided in her friend that she was concerned because I wasn't making any moves on her. Her friend was dating my friend, so the word got back to me. Actually, I'm happy that I took the time to build a relationship and got to know my wife-to-be before moving onto other areas of the relationship. We're not all "horn dogs." 🙂
MainFramed
Diamond Member
hahahaha....thats a bit slef explaining right from the question 😉
Angrymarshmello
Lifer
Depends on the guy. If they're like most guys they just want to get you over and do stuff with you. Then again it may just be a guy who does want to study with you. You won't know until you go over there. Just make sure you lay down ground rules for the study date so to speak
if guy and study then
goto library
else
he will go for panties
goto library
else
he will go for panties
Here's my 0.02
You have to basically use your own judgement on this one. None of us have met this guy, so we have no idea and any opinion we could offer is essentially without merit. It'd be one thing if you were asking us:
"Ex-cons: how trustworthy are they?"
But you're just asking about guys in college. They could be great, they could be idiots. Just like guys before and after college. If you have any doubts, don't go or suggest meeting in a public place like a coffeehouse or something.
You have to basically use your own judgement on this one. None of us have met this guy, so we have no idea and any opinion we could offer is essentially without merit. It'd be one thing if you were asking us:
"Ex-cons: how trustworthy are they?"
But you're just asking about guys in college. They could be great, they could be idiots. Just like guys before and after college. If you have any doubts, don't go or suggest meeting in a public place like a coffeehouse or something.
propellerhead
Golden Member
If he tries anything, consider this... The infamous courtroom testimony of the Mississippi woman who grabbed her rapist by his tool and twisted until be begged for mercy.
Skyclad1uhm1
Lifer
But then, if the girl doesn't want to hurt his feelings when he tries something and hesitates with the rejection, there are guys who think that means their 'no' actually means 'yes', but that they are playing hard to get. One of my sisters was nearly raped that way, her landlord heard the noise though and came to check it out. Some guys think they are irresistable and will not stop at 'no'. I am not like that, and a lot of other guys aren't either, but they only need the bad luck to encounter one of the millions who are. Usually those are the more confident and self-aware types too, which tend to be more attractive to women, and therefor presume the girl will have agreed to meet for more than just studying.
The law should allow public lynching of rapists.
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