++ ATOT official NEF thread part IV ++

[eldorado99]

qqq

 

[alfa147x]

In my late 20s, I made an effort to socialize more and try to be happier. I still didn't go to corporate stuff, but I tried meeting more people and hanging out with others. I enjoyed it and made good friends.

Increasingly, though, I am isolating myself more as I get older. My wife has commented on it more than once.

I can kinda see that in me. Do you regret the decline?

 

[IndyColtsFan]

Now, we do have a yearly New Years Eve party and we'll probably have more summer parties this year because of our patio, but we typically invite people we know and I can at least tolerate (BARELY in the cases of some of my wife's friends ). Even still, the reason I've typically tried to have the NYE party every year is because I'm afraid if I don't, my wife will drag me somewhere else. No thanks!

 

[Gothgar]

Neff

 

[IndyColtsFan]

I can kinda see that in me. Do you regret the decline?

Good question. I suppose that if I had a regret, it wouldn't be my decline in socializing or my increased isolation; rather, my regret would be that I didn't really recognize the importance when I was younger and take more steps to resolve the issue. It is quite possible that I couldn't have resolved it regardless, but I guess I wish I would've tried.

 

[Gothgar]

I actually have decent social skills and present myself very well. My problem is that I don't really like socializing with most people. If any social activity at work is voluntary, for example, I won't show up. Work parties (holidays, picnics, etc)? I've been in the corporate world since 1996, and IIRC, I have been to exactly 1 corporate picnic and no holiday or other parties the entire time.

This is me pretty much, except corporate world from around 2001 to 05, now a contractor.

 

[Gothgar]

Nef

 

[IndyColtsFan]

Good question. I suppose that if I had a regret, it wouldn't be my decline in socializing or my increased isolation; rather, my regret would be that I didn't really recognize the importance when I was younger and take more steps to resolve the issue. It is quite possible that I couldn't have resolved it regardless, but I guess I wish I would've tried.

Even in high school, I recognized I was isolating myself and that I didn't think socializing with others was fun. However, I didn't think it was that important.

 

[Gothgar]

I also, don't really feel like socializing with people, though I am not shy, and can do it.

I just don't feel like it. Most people end up liking me when me wife drags me to things, I just would rather do none of it.

 

[Gothgar]

Nedff

 

[alfa147x]

My socializing hight was in high school. After I started dating my gf and moving to college away from my friends it's been a decline. I'm hoping it's because most people here are not my type of folks :\

 

[IndyColtsFan]

I also, don't really feel like socializing with people, though I am not shy, and can do it.

I just don't feel like it. Most people end up liking me when me wife drags me to things, I just would rather do none of it.

My wife has a few friends. Allow me to describe the main ones:

1. Couple #1: The guy is a geek, likes video games, and is funny and pretty cool. The wife is so annoying that I want a truck to run over my head when I'm around her.

2. Couple #2: The wife is a good person but incredibly naive, idealistic, and annoying. The husband was a guy she met online and dated a whopping 2 months before marrying (after she was "in love" with another guy she dated for 2 months). He is an IT guy but claims to be "passionate" about opera, cares about the brands of kitchen utensils, and is a pretentious "foody" and actually thinks an MBA is an "academic" pursuit. He is someone effeminate and my wife and her best friend think he might actually be gay.

3. Best friend: Single, good looking girl with big knockers. Very pretentious and her life is a wreck (finances and love life). Can't find any decent guys and the guys she does hook up with are generally a joke.

 

[IndyColtsFan]

My socializing hight was in high school. After I started dating my gf and moving to college away from my friends it's been a decline. I'm hoping it's because most people here are not my type of folks :\

It gets harder to make friends as you get older. The main difficulty my wife and I have is that we're childless and it is hard finding couples who are childless.

 

[eldorado99]

ned

 

[busydude]

This is me pretty much, except corporate world from around 2001 to 05, now a contractor.

You started working when you were 19?

 

[IndyColtsFan]

Well crap, looks like I may have to go to $150+ to win an Amiga 1000 on eBay.

 

[Locut0s]

You have to read that as "dress or backpack."

But it's more fun to read it as dress and backpack!

 

[SaDiZTiKStyLeZ]

stuff

 

[SaDiZTiKStyLeZ]

I would rather go to a smaller party with people I know.

Yep...
It doesn't matter how big or small the party is, as long as I've been acquainted with most, if not everyone.
Aside from concerts, I tend to get social anxiety around larger crowds of people I don't know.
I'm definitely not a social butterfly, but when alone with zero social interaction with other humans in real life, it comes a point when, fuck it.
I generally prefer quieter boring hole in the wall craft-beer joints than clubs & such. But that's obviously not where the females can be found so it's like, meh.

I went to a larger happenin' bar once in college. My anxiety kicked it after about an hour & I had to straight bail. I didn't tell anyone bye, or that I was leaving before I jetted. Started getting texts about an hour later. That was the last time they invited me out. They turned down my offers to go drinking at some nearby brewpubs too.

 

[IndyColtsFan]

I especially like these silly-ass corporate exercises when they claim they're trying to "get you out of your comfort zone" when they pair you in groups with other departments or people you don't know. Uh, sorry, all that does is annoy me for a few hours.

 

[Locut0s]

Yep...
It doesn't matter how big or small the party is, as long as I've been acquainted with most, if not everyone.
Aside from concerts, I tend to get social anxiety around larger crowds of people I don't know.
I'm definitely not a social butterfly, but when alone with zero social interaction with other humans in real life, it comes a point when, fuck it.
I generally prefer quieter boring hole in the wall craft-beer joints than clubs & such. But that's obviously not where the females can be found so it's like, meh.

Don't let your social anxiety become a medical condition. Trust me it's not good.

 

[IndyColtsFan]

We had a department meeting earlier this week and the head of our department (the CFO) said she has formed a "committee" of people in our department to come up with social activities for our group. She then mentioned that none of it would be mandatory, because she "knew many of us would not like that." I was happy to hear that but I also know they'll likely be keeping tabs on who shows and who doesn't.

 

[eldorado99]

;;;

 

[Locut0s]

I especially like these silly-ass corporate exercises when they claim they're trying to "get you out of your comfort zone" when they pair you in groups with other departments or people you don't know. Uh, sorry, all that does is annoy me for a few hours.

For others it might be stressful though?

 

[busydude]

There is a very good reason I don't go to house parties. The beer sucks.. I refuse to drink cheap beer. This guy I know almost forced me to drink PBR.. he went to say that.. "you are America so you must drink PBR." I just told him to fuck off.. left the place and bought my self a $12 bottle of Duvel.