Any gay ATOT'ers here?

[91TTZ]

Originally posted by: JS80

You're not technically gay until you act out on it.

This is false, and ridiculous.

Your instinctual tendencies define whether you're gay or not. What you just said makes no sense. That's like saying that a guy isn't straight until they've had sex with a woman.

A guy knows he's gay, straight, or bi before he ever acts out on those tendencies. I knew I was straight before I ever was with a woman, since I was only sexually attracted to women. I'm not attracted to men.

 

[K1052]

Originally posted by: JS80

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: HeroOfPellinor

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: HeroOfPellinor

Originally posted by: moshquerade
imho, no one chooses to be gay. they are just born that way.

Imho, your statements has no pertinence to the OP's question. And, fwiw, I disagree with you and think suboptimal conditions lead to people being inclined that way.

my statement is related to the issue posed in the question.

explain these "suboptimal conditions" that lead to homosexuality.

Lack of father figure growing up, bad experiences with girls early on, molestation, people treating you like you're gay and making you doubt yourself, burning out/boredom with "orinary" sex, etc. Chart the rise in homosexuality with the increased number of broken homes.

Also, I have a cousin who is gay. He met the first condition above and I recall him stating in his adolescent years that he "wanted" to be gay and, surprise, he's now gay.

So, uh, what's your reason? You heard some guy on TV say something once? :thumbsup:

I don't know what programs you are watching on TV, but I've never heard a guy on "TV say something" even once about people being born with an inherent tendency to be homosexual. Your assumption that I am basing my opinion on a talking head on TV is borderline insultive and the reason that a lot of these threads do indeed become flame wars.

The reason I believe people are born homosexual is the same reason I believe people are born heterosexual. We have these feelings either way from the beginning. We can try to deny them, but they are there no matter what we do.

I know many gay people and they did not come from single parent homes, abusive homes, etc.
Otherwise, how would you explain siblings in the same exact home, and the same exact conditions NOT being gay?

And who wasn't picked on in their youth? It doesn't make someone "turn gay".
Also, I've never come across someone who couldn't get a girlfriend so they turned to pursuing a boyfriend. The only time I've seen that is because the person truly didn't have their heart into girls and they were in denial about their homosexuality.

Is there a "rise in homosexuality" or is there just a rise in those who dare to admit and to practice homosexuality? Even though not universally accepted, homosexuality is far more tolerated by the populace than it used to be, and more have dared to come out of the closet. That accounts for the "rise in homosexuality".

You're not technically gay until you act out on it. So I would say there technically IS a "rise in homosexuality" because of the "acceptance" by it in modern civilization, more people are willing to "try it out."

Or more likely (imo) because the threat of physical injury or possible death isn't usually a direct consequense of coming ot or being discovered anymore.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: 91TTZ

Originally posted by: JS80

You're not technically gay until you act out on it.

This is false, and ridiculous.

Your instinctual tendencies define whether you're gay or not. What you just said makes no sense. That's like saying that a guy isn't straight until they've had sex with a woman.

A guy knows he's gay, straight, or bi before he ever acts out on those tendencies. I knew I was straight before I ever was with a woman, since I was only sexually attracted to women. I'm not attracted to men.

agreed.

 

[JS80]

Originally posted by: 91TTZ

Originally posted by: JS80

You're not technically gay until you act out on it.

This is false, and ridiculous.

Your instinctual tendencies define whether you're gay or not. What you just said makes no sense. That's like saying that a guy isn't straight until they've had sex with a woman.

A guy knows he's gay, straight, or bi before he ever acts out on those tendencies. I knew I was straight before I ever was with a woman, since I was only sexually attracted to women. I'm not attracted to men.

Does someone who has tendencies to molest children but dies never acting upon it make him a pedophile?

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: JS80

Originally posted by: 91TTZ

Originally posted by: JS80

You're not technically gay until you act out on it.

This is false, and ridiculous.

Your instinctual tendencies define whether you're gay or not. What you just said makes no sense. That's like saying that a guy isn't straight until they've had sex with a woman.

A guy knows he's gay, straight, or bi before he ever acts out on those tendencies. I knew I was straight before I ever was with a woman, since I was only sexually attracted to women. I'm not attracted to men.

Does someone who has tendencies to molest children but dies never acting upon it make him a pedophile?

i think that's a stretch.
as 91TTZ said do you have to have sex with a woman before you are considered heterosexual?

 

[91TTZ]

Take a look at a lot of priests... a high percentage of them are gay, that's probably why they wanted to be a priest in the first place. If you're religious and know there's something wrong because you're attracted to men and not women, what are you to do? Become a priest, where you can't be with women. Perfect cover.

Of course, their tendencies often overcome them, which is why there's so many scandals with priests.

 

[91TTZ]

Originally posted by: JS80


Does someone who has tendencies to molest children but dies never acting upon it make him a pedophile?

Yes. Definitely.

Check out the definition:

Pedophile

"ped·o·phile (ped'?-fil', pe'd?-) Pronunciation Key
n. An adult who is sexually attracted to a child or children. "

In your example you already said they have the tendency, so yes, someone with that tendency is, by definition, a pedophile.

 

[JS80]

lol i give up.

 

[Zysoclaplem]

Originally posted by: JS80
lol i give up.

People don't want an answer. People want to give their opinions.
This isn't a situation where you can win, so you cannot technically give up.
The question was "If you could snap your fingers and suddenly become heterosexual, would you?"
It's like asking a black man/woman if he/she could snap his fingers and become white, would he?
Is white better than black?
Is straight better than gay?
Is male better than female?
Is Honda better than Toyota?

 

[Platypus]

Hmm, I'll do something I've never done before and reply to one of these threads.

I love these threads.... where straight people sit around and argue whether or not being gay is a choice or not.

There's no silver bullet here but I'll chime in my personal experience: no, being gay is NOT a choice, it's something I've known as long as I've been able to have cognitive thought. Would I snap my fingers and become straight? That's a question I don't think I can answer.

One part of me would say hell yes, that way I can stop living the two completely different lives that have been tearing me apart for 13 years... I can live a normal life where because of something completely out of my control, I'm seen as a lesser human being. I can wake up in the morning and say 'I'm so glad I don't have to worry about my supposedly close friends turning on me because of what I like to do in my bedroom.' I can be a person defined by my actions instead of by my sexual preference. I get so tired of lying to people all the time at work about why I don't have a girlfriend or why I don't like oggling all the girls at work, coming to functions alone rather than make everyone there uncomfortable by showing up with a guy. I'm stuck in that position where I don't want to tell people because it's none of their business but at the same time I'm tired of painting a pretty picture to cover up the truth.

The other part says.. fvck those people. Forget all the ignorant close minded assholes who think they're somehow better than I am because they rolled a 6 instead of a 2 in the game of life. Being gay has made me who I am today and for that I don't think I'd change anything. I wouldn't want to be just like everyone else, the status quo. The way I've had to live my life for so long like I'm a walking virus to people, always worried that I'd make people uncomfortable, that's made me the person I am today.. a much more compassionate, caring person completely open to lots of ideas and choices. I won't lie and say that this is easy for me to post, in fact I've avoided the topic for years here because I want people to know me for who I am inside, not what I do in my room. I don't think it matters but obviously there are those out there that do.

I invited a very homophobic member of this forum to come hang out with me one time. He had no idea that I was gay and I didn't feel it neccesary to bring up because it's no one's business. En route he discovered the truth and he told me he pulled off to the side of the road halfway here and contemplated turning around and not seeing it through. He ended up coming and realizing that there's no way you'd know unless I told you. Lots of people have this image in their minds of gay people, fashion concious, lisp talking, emotional.. I'm just a regular guy, I like beer and football and all the normal things everyone else does from my sex. He said he felt so sad that for so long he was so hateful and ignorant to the way things really were that he thanked me so much for showing him that we're just normal people too. He's still a good friend till this day and I'm proud to call him the same.

I won't lie and say it's easy.. hell I've been sitting here hovering over the post button for 20 minutes now, but I've finally gotten the courage to just say fvck it, I can't change this and I might as well get used to it or I'll continue to live a horrible life of depression and self-loathing. If that causes people to think of me differently, fine, I'm not going to stop that no matter how hard I try, but hopefully someone out there who's been hiding as long as I have will read this and get the tiny piece of hope someone gave me not so long ago.

Does that help?

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: Platypus
Hmm, I'll do something I've never done before and reply to one of these threads.

I love these threads.... where straight people sit around and argue whether or not being gay is a choice or not.

There's no silver bullet here but I'll chime in my personal experience: no, being gay is NOT a choice, it's something I've known as long as I've been able to have cognitive thought. Would I snap my fingers and become straight? That's a question I don't think I can answer.

One part of me would say hell yes, that way I can stop living the two completely different lives that have been tearing me apart for 13 years... I can live a normal life where because of something completely out of my control, I'm seen as a lesser human being. I can wake up in the morning and say 'I'm so glad I don't have to worry about my supposedly close friends turning on me because of what I like to do in my bedroom.' I can be a person defined by my actions instead of by my sexual preference. I get so tired of lying to people all the time at work about why I don't have a girlfriend or why I don't like oggling all the girls at work, coming to functions alone rather than make everyone there uncomfortable by showing up with a guy. I'm stuck in that position where I don't want to tell people because it's none of their business but at the same time I'm tired of painting a pretty picture to cover up the truth.

The other part says.. fvck those people. Forget all the ignorant close minded assholes who think they're somehow better than I am because they rolled a 6 instead of a 2 in the game of life. Being gay has made me who I am today and for that I don't think I'd change anything. I wouldn't want to be just like everyone else, the status quo. The way I've had to live my life for so long like I'm a walking virus to people, always worried that I'd make people uncomfortable, that's made me the person I am today.. a much more compassionate, caring person completely open to lots of ideas and choices. I won't lie and say that this is easy for me to post, in fact I've avoided the topic for years here because I want people to know me for who I am inside, not what I do in my room. I don't think it matters but obviously there are those out there that do.

I invited a very homophobic member of this forum to come hang out with me one time. He had no idea that I was gay and I didn't feel it neccesary to bring up because it's no one's business. En route he discovered the truth and he told me he pulled off to the side of the road halfway here and contemplated turning around and not seeing it through. He ended up coming and realizing that there's no way you'd know unless I told you. Lots of people have this image in their minds of gay people, fashion concious, lisp talking, emotional.. I'm just a regular guy, I like beer and football and all the normal things everyone else does from my sex. He said he felt so sad that for so long he was so hateful and ignorant to the way things really were that he thanked me so much for showing him that we're just normal people too. He's still a good friend till this day and I'm proud to call him the same.

I won't lie and say it's easy.. hell I've been sitting here hovering over the post button for 20 minutes now, but I've finally gotten the courage to just say fvck it, I can't change this and I might as well get used to it or I'll continue to live a horrible life of depression and self-loathing. If that causes people to think of me differently, fine, I'm not going to stop that no matter how hard I try, but hopefully someone out there who's been hiding as long as I have will read this and get the tiny piece of hope someone gave me not so long ago.

Does that help?

:heart:

 

[GeekDrew]

Originally posted by: sm8000
Not all gays get ostracized, disowned, and hated by society.

Most do, at some point.

As for me... if I had the choice back at puberty as to if I could be gay or straight, I would have taken straight without hesitation. It would have made my life *much* easier.

At this point, however, I can say with absolutely certainty that there is no way I would "turn straight", even if there was a foolproof way to do so. It's my life, and a very significant part of it at that, I'm not about to completely abandon it altogether (and that's exactly what I would be doing). Would you be willing to abandon your life as you've always known it, just to conform to what some other people want you to be? I'm not. Yes, there's an uphill battle, but I can do it, and I *have* done it, over and over. I've already "fought the fight", so to speak.

While life will be a continual battle for gays for quite some time into the future, I've already gained acceptance from quite a few people that I never dreamed possible -- and many, many people have told me that I'm the reason that they now accept gays. One coworker, for example, was very homophobic, and I finally just told him. A few months later, he said "thanks"; he considered me a friend, and realized that not all gays conform to the annoying stereotypical bs. I know of other employees at that company that have since come out of the closet, and have spoke with me recently, saying that the environment as it applies toward gays is drastically different there now, as compared to what it was before I worked there.</ramble>

 

[Excelsior]

:thumbsup: Drew.

 

[judasmachine]

I'd snap my fingers and switch sexuality based on the ratio of men to women at a given party/bar/reststop.

 

[ThePresence]

Originally posted by: Platypus
Hmm, I'll do something I've never done before and reply to one of these threads.

I love these threads.... where straight people sit around and argue whether or not being gay is a choice or not.

There's no silver bullet here but I'll chime in my personal experience: no, being gay is NOT a choice, it's something I've known as long as I've been able to have cognitive thought. Would I snap my fingers and become straight? That's a question I don't think I can answer.

One part of me would say hell yes, that way I can stop living the two completely different lives that have been tearing me apart for 13 years... I can live a normal life where because of something completely out of my control, I'm seen as a lesser human being. I can wake up in the morning and say 'I'm so glad I don't have to worry about my supposedly close friends turning on me because of what I like to do in my bedroom.' I can be a person defined by my actions instead of by my sexual preference. I get so tired of lying to people all the time at work about why I don't have a girlfriend or why I don't like oggling all the girls at work, coming to functions alone rather than make everyone there uncomfortable by showing up with a guy. I'm stuck in that position where I don't want to tell people because it's none of their business but at the same time I'm tired of painting a pretty picture to cover up the truth.

The other part says.. fvck those people. Forget all the ignorant close minded assholes who think they're somehow better than I am because they rolled a 6 instead of a 2 in the game of life. Being gay has made me who I am today and for that I don't think I'd change anything. I wouldn't want to be just like everyone else, the status quo. The way I've had to live my life for so long like I'm a walking virus to people, always worried that I'd make people uncomfortable, that's made me the person I am today.. a much more compassionate, caring person completely open to lots of ideas and choices. I won't lie and say that this is easy for me to post, in fact I've avoided the topic for years here because I want people to know me for who I am inside, not what I do in my room. I don't think it matters but obviously there are those out there that do.

I invited a very homophobic member of this forum to come hang out with me one time. He had no idea that I was gay and I didn't feel it neccesary to bring up because it's no one's business. En route he discovered the truth and he told me he pulled off to the side of the road halfway here and contemplated turning around and not seeing it through. He ended up coming and realizing that there's no way you'd know unless I told you. Lots of people have this image in their minds of gay people, fashion concious, lisp talking, emotional.. I'm just a regular guy, I like beer and football and all the normal things everyone else does from my sex. He said he felt so sad that for so long he was so hateful and ignorant to the way things really were that he thanked me so much for showing him that we're just normal people too. He's still a good friend till this day and I'm proud to call him the same.

I won't lie and say it's easy.. hell I've been sitting here hovering over the post button for 20 minutes now, but I've finally gotten the courage to just say fvck it, I can't change this and I might as well get used to it or I'll continue to live a horrible life of depression and self-loathing. If that causes people to think of me differently, fine, I'm not going to stop that no matter how hard I try, but hopefully someone out there who's been hiding as long as I have will read this and get the tiny piece of hope someone gave me not so long ago.

Does that help?

Wow.

 

[Juice Box]

Originally posted by: Platypus
Hmm, I'll do something I've never done before and reply to one of these threads.

I love these threads.... where straight people sit around and argue whether or not being gay is a choice or not.

There's no silver bullet here but I'll chime in my personal experience: no, being gay is NOT a choice, it's something I've known as long as I've been able to have cognitive thought. Would I snap my fingers and become straight? That's a question I don't think I can answer.

One part of me would say hell yes, that way I can stop living the two completely different lives that have been tearing me apart for 13 years... I can live a normal life where because of something completely out of my control, I'm seen as a lesser human being. I can wake up in the morning and say 'I'm so glad I don't have to worry about my supposedly close friends turning on me because of what I like to do in my bedroom.' I can be a person defined by my actions instead of by my sexual preference. I get so tired of lying to people all the time at work about why I don't have a girlfriend or why I don't like oggling all the girls at work, coming to functions alone rather than make everyone there uncomfortable by showing up with a guy. I'm stuck in that position where I don't want to tell people because it's none of their business but at the same time I'm tired of painting a pretty picture to cover up the truth.

The other part says.. fvck those people. Forget all the ignorant close minded assholes who think they're somehow better than I am because they rolled a 6 instead of a 2 in the game of life. Being gay has made me who I am today and for that I don't think I'd change anything. I wouldn't want to be just like everyone else, the status quo. The way I've had to live my life for so long like I'm a walking virus to people, always worried that I'd make people uncomfortable, that's made me the person I am today.. a much more compassionate, caring person completely open to lots of ideas and choices. I won't lie and say that this is easy for me to post, in fact I've avoided the topic for years here because I want people to know me for who I am inside, not what I do in my room. I don't think it matters but obviously there are those out there that do.

I invited a very homophobic member of this forum to come hang out with me one time. He had no idea that I was gay and I didn't feel it neccesary to bring up because it's no one's business. En route he discovered the truth and he told me he pulled off to the side of the road halfway here and contemplated turning around and not seeing it through. He ended up coming and realizing that there's no way you'd know unless I told you. Lots of people have this image in their minds of gay people, fashion concious, lisp talking, emotional.. I'm just a regular guy, I like beer and football and all the normal things everyone else does from my sex. He said he felt so sad that for so long he was so hateful and ignorant to the way things really were that he thanked me so much for showing him that we're just normal people too. He's still a good friend till this day and I'm proud to call him the same.

I won't lie and say it's easy.. hell I've been sitting here hovering over the post button for 20 minutes now, but I've finally gotten the courage to just say fvck it, I can't change this and I might as well get used to it or I'll continue to live a horrible life of depression and self-loathing. If that causes people to think of me differently, fine, I'm not going to stop that no matter how hard I try, but hopefully someone out there who's been hiding as long as I have will read this and get the tiny piece of hope someone gave me not so long ago.

Does that help?

:thumbsup: Drew.....

I wish things were easier for people who others see as *different*, and it makes me so sad to see people get blown off for something that is completely out of their control. I am very happy to see you coming to terms with this, and I think that this is an excellent step in the right direction. As you said, you are a completely normal guy, and one that I am proud to call my friend. You were the one person who dis-proved all the cliches for me, and totally opened my eyes as to how hard it must be to be a homosexual in this country. I really do feel for you, and always have, and words cannot express the joy it brings me to know that you have finally accepted the life you were given, and are happy with being who you are. :beer:

Cheers Platypus, I know this took a lot for you to say..... =D

 

[CarlKillerMiller]

Originally posted by: Platypus
Hmm, I'll do something I've never done before and reply to one of these threads.

I love these threads.... where straight people sit around and argue whether or not being gay is a choice or not.

There's no silver bullet here but I'll chime in my personal experience: no, being gay is NOT a choice, it's something I've known as long as I've been able to have cognitive thought. Would I snap my fingers and become straight? That's a question I don't think I can answer.

One part of me would say hell yes, that way I can stop living the two completely different lives that have been tearing me apart for 13 years... I can live a normal life where because of something completely out of my control, I'm seen as a lesser human being. I can wake up in the morning and say 'I'm so glad I don't have to worry about my supposedly close friends turning on me because of what I like to do in my bedroom.' I can be a person defined by my actions instead of by my sexual preference. I get so tired of lying to people all the time at work about why I don't have a girlfriend or why I don't like oggling all the girls at work, coming to functions alone rather than make everyone there uncomfortable by showing up with a guy. I'm stuck in that position where I don't want to tell people because it's none of their business but at the same time I'm tired of painting a pretty picture to cover up the truth.

The other part says.. fvck those people. Forget all the ignorant close minded assholes who think they're somehow better than I am because they rolled a 6 instead of a 2 in the game of life. Being gay has made me who I am today and for that I don't think I'd change anything. I wouldn't want to be just like everyone else, the status quo. The way I've had to live my life for so long like I'm a walking virus to people, always worried that I'd make people uncomfortable, that's made me the person I am today.. a much more compassionate, caring person completely open to lots of ideas and choices. I won't lie and say that this is easy for me to post, in fact I've avoided the topic for years here because I want people to know me for who I am inside, not what I do in my room. I don't think it matters but obviously there are those out there that do.

I invited a very homophobic member of this forum to come hang out with me one time. He had no idea that I was gay and I didn't feel it neccesary to bring up because it's no one's business. En route he discovered the truth and he told me he pulled off to the side of the road halfway here and contemplated turning around and not seeing it through. He ended up coming and realizing that there's no way you'd know unless I told you. Lots of people have this image in their minds of gay people, fashion concious, lisp talking, emotional.. I'm just a regular guy, I like beer and football and all the normal things everyone else does from my sex. He said he felt so sad that for so long he was so hateful and ignorant to the way things really were that he thanked me so much for showing him that we're just normal people too. He's still a good friend till this day and I'm proud to call him the same.

I won't lie and say it's easy.. hell I've been sitting here hovering over the post button for 20 minutes now, but I've finally gotten the courage to just say fvck it, I can't change this and I might as well get used to it or I'll continue to live a horrible life of depression and self-loathing. If that causes people to think of me differently, fine, I'm not going to stop that no matter how hard I try, but hopefully someone out there who's been hiding as long as I have will read this and get the tiny piece of hope someone gave me not so long ago.

Does that help?

I don't know that anything I can say matches the amount of sincerity you put into that. Let it suffice to say that I'm proud of you, man. You've moved forward. It's not something just anyone can do. I hope that this in some way takes a burden off of your mind, even if it's just on some internet forum. Breathe easier, friend.

Neeraj

 

[Twista]

Originally posted by: moshquerade
imho, no one chooses to be gay. they are just born that way.

i disagree
i believe no-one is born gay.

 

[thirdlegstump]

Originally posted by: Twista

Originally posted by: moshquerade
imho, no one chooses to be gay. they are just born that way.

i disagree
i believe no-one is born gay.

Moron. I've heard plenty of gay people yell "I'm born gay and proud!"

 

[pontifex]

Originally posted by: Platypus
Hmm, I'll do something I've never done before and reply to one of these threads.

I love these threads.... where straight people sit around and argue whether or not being gay is a choice or not.

There's no silver bullet here but I'll chime in my personal experience: no, being gay is NOT a choice, it's something I've known as long as I've been able to have cognitive thought. Would I snap my fingers and become straight? That's a question I don't think I can answer.

One part of me would say hell yes, that way I can stop living the two completely different lives that have been tearing me apart for 13 years... I can live a normal life where because of something completely out of my control, I'm seen as a lesser human being. I can wake up in the morning and say 'I'm so glad I don't have to worry about my supposedly close friends turning on me because of what I like to do in my bedroom.' I can be a person defined by my actions instead of by my sexual preference. I get so tired of lying to people all the time at work about why I don't have a girlfriend or why I don't like oggling all the girls at work, coming to functions alone rather than make everyone there uncomfortable by showing up with a guy. I'm stuck in that position where I don't want to tell people because it's none of their business but at the same time I'm tired of painting a pretty picture to cover up the truth.

The other part says.. fvck those people. Forget all the ignorant close minded assholes who think they're somehow better than I am because they rolled a 6 instead of a 2 in the game of life. Being gay has made me who I am today and for that I don't think I'd change anything. I wouldn't want to be just like everyone else, the status quo. The way I've had to live my life for so long like I'm a walking virus to people, always worried that I'd make people uncomfortable, that's made me the person I am today.. a much more compassionate, caring person completely open to lots of ideas and choices. I won't lie and say that this is easy for me to post, in fact I've avoided the topic for years here because I want people to know me for who I am inside, not what I do in my room. I don't think it matters but obviously there are those out there that do.

I invited a very homophobic member of this forum to come hang out with me one time. He had no idea that I was gay and I didn't feel it neccesary to bring up because it's no one's business. En route he discovered the truth and he told me he pulled off to the side of the road halfway here and contemplated turning around and not seeing it through. He ended up coming and realizing that there's no way you'd know unless I told you. Lots of people have this image in their minds of gay people, fashion concious, lisp talking, emotional.. I'm just a regular guy, I like beer and football and all the normal things everyone else does from my sex. He said he felt so sad that for so long he was so hateful and ignorant to the way things really were that he thanked me so much for showing him that we're just normal people too. He's still a good friend till this day and I'm proud to call him the same.

I won't lie and say it's easy.. hell I've been sitting here hovering over the post button for 20 minutes now, but I've finally gotten the courage to just say fvck it, I can't change this and I might as well get used to it or I'll continue to live a horrible life of depression and self-loathing. If that causes people to think of me differently, fine, I'm not going to stop that no matter how hard I try, but hopefully someone out there who's been hiding as long as I have will read this and get the tiny piece of hope someone gave me not so long ago.

Does that help?

Awesome dude! great post too.

 

[3NF]

Originally posted by: moshquerade
imho, no one chooses to be gay. they are just born that way.

Exactly

 

[DainBramaged]

Originally posted by: Platypus
Hmm, I'll do something I've never done before and reply to one of these threads.

I love these threads.... where straight people sit around and argue whether or not being gay is a choice or not.

There's no silver bullet here but I'll chime in my personal experience: no, being gay is NOT a choice, it's something I've known as long as I've been able to have cognitive thought. Would I snap my fingers and become straight? That's a question I don't think I can answer.

One part of me would say hell yes, that way I can stop living the two completely different lives that have been tearing me apart for 13 years... I can live a normal life where because of something completely out of my control, I'm seen as a lesser human being. I can wake up in the morning and say 'I'm so glad I don't have to worry about my supposedly close friends turning on me because of what I like to do in my bedroom.' I can be a person defined by my actions instead of by my sexual preference. I get so tired of lying to people all the time at work about why I don't have a girlfriend or why I don't like oggling all the girls at work, coming to functions alone rather than make everyone there uncomfortable by showing up with a guy. I'm stuck in that position where I don't want to tell people because it's none of their business but at the same time I'm tired of painting a pretty picture to cover up the truth.

The other part says.. fvck those people. Forget all the ignorant close minded assholes who think they're somehow better than I am because they rolled a 6 instead of a 2 in the game of life. Being gay has made me who I am today and for that I don't think I'd change anything. I wouldn't want to be just like everyone else, the status quo. The way I've had to live my life for so long like I'm a walking virus to people, always worried that I'd make people uncomfortable, that's made me the person I am today.. a much more compassionate, caring person completely open to lots of ideas and choices. I won't lie and say that this is easy for me to post, in fact I've avoided the topic for years here because I want people to know me for who I am inside, not what I do in my room. I don't think it matters but obviously there are those out there that do.

I invited a very homophobic member of this forum to come hang out with me one time. He had no idea that I was gay and I didn't feel it neccesary to bring up because it's no one's business. En route he discovered the truth and he told me he pulled off to the side of the road halfway here and contemplated turning around and not seeing it through. He ended up coming and realizing that there's no way you'd know unless I told you. Lots of people have this image in their minds of gay people, fashion concious, lisp talking, emotional.. I'm just a regular guy, I like beer and football and all the normal things everyone else does from my sex. He said he felt so sad that for so long he was so hateful and ignorant to the way things really were that he thanked me so much for showing him that we're just normal people too. He's still a good friend till this day and I'm proud to call him the same.

I won't lie and say it's easy.. hell I've been sitting here hovering over the post button for 20 minutes now, but I've finally gotten the courage to just say fvck it, I can't change this and I might as well get used to it or I'll continue to live a horrible life of depression and self-loathing. If that causes people to think of me differently, fine, I'm not going to stop that no matter how hard I try, but hopefully someone out there who's been hiding as long as I have will read this and get the tiny piece of hope someone gave me not so long ago.

Does that help?

That took balls and honestly. Props, man. :thumbsup:

It's to my shame that I admit I was the ATOT'er mentioned in Drew's thread. Thanks for taking the time, man.

:music:On the turning away...:music:

 

[Crazee]

Originally posted by: JS80
Place that animal in front of a female in heat vs another male, it will hump the female 101% of the time. Humping something due to the lack of females does not make the animal homosexual.

Wrong. Read and learn.

Taken from the article:

Roy and Silo, two chinstrap penguins at the Central Park Zoo in Manhattan, are completely devoted to each other. For nearly six years now, they have been inseparable. They exhibit what in penguin parlance is called "ecstatic behavior": That is, they entwine their necks, they vocalize to each other, they have sex. Silo and Roy are, to anthropomorphize a bit, gay penguins.

Then in 1999, Bruce Bagemihl published "Biological Exuberance: Animal Homosexuality and Natural Diversity" (St. Martin's Press), one of the first books of its kind to provide an overview of scholarly studies of same-sex behavior in animals. Bagemihl said homosexual behavior had been documented in some 450 species.

Before you go spouting off crap like there are no homosexual animals, please try a google search.

 

[brownh2o]

Originally posted by: Twista

Originally posted by: moshquerade
imho, no one chooses to be gay. they are just born that way.

i disagree
i believe no-one is born gay.

Comprehension isn't a strong point for you, is it? Apparently, you managed to miss the last five pages, choosing instead to interject your opinion, fully believing that people care for it over an open discussion.

I suppose this is the same reason your signature says to "Buy American, buy Ford." I suppose if you did a bit of research, your signature might read, "Buy Canadian, Mexican, British, German, Brazilian, Argentinian, Australian, and Chinese -- BUY A FORD" or "Support the idling of most major plants and loss of American jobs, buy a Ford", or something similiar. But that wouldn't be a good repetion of rhetoric, nor would it be a good gut response. Facts get in the way of those things.

Next time you may want to think before embarassing yourself.

 

[bob4432]

i haven't read the posts, but op - if you could snap your fingers and be gay would you? there is the answer

being gay is not a choice. it just happens in the brain. one has no control of it. you don't choose what tickles your pickle