Any advice on dealing with haemorrhoids (piles)?

[StinkyPinky]

I've been quite lucky with this stuff but I think I'm starting to get one. At the moment it is bearable but it does hurt a bit when I do a #2 and there's a very tiny bit of blood when I wipe. Is there any way to get this thing to go away by itself or am I stuck with it? My wife thinks I'm screwed as she's had them for a few years now and they haven't really gone for her. D:

 

[smackababy]

I'd just like to point out, you picked a wonderful username well in advance of this thread. Other than that, I am of little to no help. Maybe they can be lanced off by a doctor? I know they sell cream for them.

 

[Scotteq]

Glue sandpaper on a dildo, put the un-papered end in a blender, sit, and press the button.


There's also a Russian cure which involves an airbag...

 

[StinkyPinky]

Glue sandpaper on a dildo, put the un-papered end in a blender, sit, and press the button.


There's also a Russian cure which involves an airbag...

Huh, I don't need to. Our toilet paper achieves the same result. :'(

 

[AyashiKaibutsu]

Cutting it off with a butter knife or burning it off with a bic are the only two known cures.

The fix for it is actually surgery, but that isn't done unless it's very bad.

Changing diet (higher fiber and whatnot) and making sure you don't strain when you go is the main thing you're supposed to do to reduce them.

 

[ControlD]

There is a new(ish) procedure that they do around here called banding which is a fairly quick process. A band is placed around the protrusion which cuts off the blood flow and it simply falls off. I haven't had it done but know of people that have and it seems to work well and doesn't require a surgical visit.

 

[Murloc]

well you should go to a doctor, show him your anus and he should tell you if you just need to put anti-hemorroid cream on it or if doing what dave suggested is better.
I don't know if those creams require a prescription, if they don't, you may try that first.

 

[StinkyPinky]

I'm sure everyone here was eagerly awaiting further news on my damaged anus. After getting probed not so gently, it's apparently a fissure and not piles. Overall this is good news as they usually slowly heal over a month or two. Why does it take so long I hear everyone ask. Well that's because every time you crap you reopen the wound. This is natures way of reminding you how much it hates you.

Anyway, you can all rest easy now and inform everyone else you told. My anus will live on.

 

[Blackjack200]

Awesome tag.

Just a thought, but when you eat less, you crap less, so maybe this is a good time to go on a crash diet, lose a few pounds, and let you ass heal at the same time?