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A Letter to the President

Perknose

Perknose

Forum Director & Omnipotent Overlord
Forum Director
Got this in the mail from an activist friend. It would be funnier if the joke weren't on us.
Dear President Bush -

Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you any more. There's no more
money to spend--you used up all of that. You can't start another war
because you used up the army. And now, darn the luck, the rest of your
term has become the Bush family nightmare: helping poor people. Listen to
your Mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit cards maxed out. No one's
speaking to you. Mission accomplished.

Now it's time to do what you've always done best: lose interest and walk
away. Like you did with your military service and the oil company and the
baseball team. It's time. Time to move on and try the next fantasy job.
How about cowboy or space man? Now I know what you're saying: there's so
many other things that you as President could involve yourself in. Please
don't. I know, I know. There's a lot left to do. There's a war with
Venezuela. Eliminating the sales tax on yachts. Turning the space program
over to the church. And Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the
vote.

But, Sir, none of that is going to happen now. Why? Because you govern
like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so poorly I'm surprised that you
haven't given yourself a medal. You're a catastrophe that walks like a
man. Herbert Hoover was a sh2tty president, but even he never conceded an
entire city to rising water and snakes.

On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four
airliners, two trade centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of New
Orleans. Maybe you're just not lucky. I'm not saying you don't love this
country. I'm just wondering how much worse it could be if you were on the
other side.

So, yes, God does speak to you. What he is saying is: "Take a hint."

- Bill Mahrer
Click to expand...
 
It's not like Bill Mahre to make such a glaringly obvious ommission. Shrub also lost the support and respect of the majority of the American people. If I wasn't so true, I'd laugh. 🙁
 
Yes, I laughed when i was reading it, but then you think about it. I guess you can laugh and cry at the same time, but to me it's sader then funny.
 
Now I know what you're saying: there's so
many other things that you as President could involve yourself in. Please
don't. I know, I know. There's a lot left to do. There's a war with
Venezuela. Eliminating the sales tax on yachts. Turning the space program
over to the church. And Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the
vote.
Click to expand...

HAHAHA!
 
ROFLMAO. Mahrer can't talk half the time let alone write. I'll file this in the same category as Michael Moore's "letter" -- the sh!tcan.
 
My only thought for Bill Mahrer is whom he had to blow to get his job. I have seen his work prior to landing the talk show spot, and nothing about it suggest any future beyond waiting tables.

I do find the show funny now in a sort of Howard Cosell fashion, but Mahrer is just a talking head reading stuff others write for him, and preaching to the choir.
 
Bill Maher? i thought he was done. oh well. hes still old news

rather have Jon Stewart. at least his left wing show is worth watching
 
Originally posted by: mikeford
. . . Mahrer is just a talking head reading stuff others write for him . . .
Click to expand...
Mahrer does indeed write a good deal of his own stuff, he's a GREAT comedy writer, always has been.

 
The man does have a degree in English from Cornell University - last I looked they did require some basic writing skills to go with that. And he has been employeed as a writer at times in his career...

But what truly is convincing is his ad lib remarks...watching him off the cuff those quips makes you realize that even if he's pre-written half of them, the other half are still pretty amazing.

NB - doesn't it drive the neo-cons crazy that Maher is personally good friends with their pin-up girl, Ann Coultier? That he can take her to dinner, and they can't get a book signed? (Look it up on wikipedia if you don't believe...)

Future Shock
 
Originally posted by: Perknose
Got this in the mail from an activist friend. It would be funnier if the joke weren't on us.
Dear President Bush -

Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you any more. There's no more
money to spend--you used up all of that. You can't start another war
because you used up the army. And now, darn the luck, the rest of your
term has become the Bush family nightmare: helping poor people. Listen to
your Mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit cards maxed out. No one's
speaking to you. Mission accomplished.

Now it's time to do what you've always done best: lose interest and walk
away. Like you did with your military service and the oil company and the
baseball team. It's time. Time to move on and try the next fantasy job.
How about cowboy or space man? Now I know what you're saying: there's so
many other things that you as President could involve yourself in. Please
don't. I know, I know. There's a lot left to do. There's a war with
Venezuela. Eliminating the sales tax on yachts. Turning the space program
over to the church. And Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the
vote.

But, Sir, none of that is going to happen now. Why? Because you govern
like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so poorly I'm surprised that you
haven't given yourself a medal. You're a catastrophe that walks like a
man. Herbert Hoover was a sh2tty president, but even he never conceded an
entire city to rising water and snakes.

On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four
airliners, two trade centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of New
Orleans. Maybe you're just not lucky. I'm not saying you don't love this
country. I'm just wondering how much worse it could be if you were on the
other side.

So, yes, God does speak to you. What he is saying is: "Take a hint."

- Bill Mahrer
Click to expand...
Click to expand...

OMFG, Bill obviously frequents this Forum.

Great piece of writing Bill. :thumbsup:

Glad we could help 😀
 
Bill can be entertaining, but...

I believe Bill is what you would call a leftwing gatekeeper, that is, he perpetuates the myth that there is a viable difference between the left and right. The thing is, they are all corrupt left to right, top to bottom.

He may not even know he's a leftwing gatekeeper, believing in the false dichotomy himself. Trapped in a lifelong fight between staged opponents; a fight that keeps you all busy while the real politics go on behind the scenes by unelected psychos.

Hey, anyone who can call Ann Coulter their friend surely has something fubar in their head.
 
Originally posted by: Perknose
Got this in the mail from an activist friend. It would be funnier if the joke weren't on us.
Dear President Bush -

Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you any more. There's no more
money to spend--you used up all of that. You can't start another war
because you used up the army. And now, darn the luck, the rest of your
term has become the Bush family nightmare: helping poor people. Listen to
your Mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit cards maxed out. No one's
speaking to you. Mission accomplished.

Now it's time to do what you've always done best: lose interest and walk
away. Like you did with your military service and the oil company and the
baseball team. It's time. Time to move on and try the next fantasy job.
How about cowboy or space man? Now I know what you're saying: there's so
many other things that you as President could involve yourself in. Please
don't. I know, I know. There's a lot left to do. There's a war with
Venezuela. Eliminating the sales tax on yachts. Turning the space program
over to the church. And Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the
vote.

But, Sir, none of that is going to happen now. Why? Because you govern
like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so poorly I'm surprised that you
haven't given yourself a medal. You're a catastrophe that walks like a
man. Herbert Hoover was a sh2tty president, but even he never conceded an
entire city to rising water and snakes.

On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four
airliners, two trade centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of New
Orleans. Maybe you're just not lucky. I'm not saying you don't love this
country. I'm just wondering how much worse it could be if you were on the
other side.

So, yes, God does speak to you. What he is saying is: "Take a hint."

- Bill Mahrer
Click to expand...
Click to expand...

Has Mahrer still got that closet thing going on for Clinton. I mean, Clinton could do no wrong in his eyes and everytime he mentioned his name the eyes glittered!

 
I could only watch about half the current show, it was a bit sad to see that Carlin apparently is insane, or unwilling to drop out of character.
 
Originally posted by: TheSnowman
That is him, I'm guessing you just haven't seen much of the show if you think he is a Democract.
Click to expand...


Mahre is neither a Rep or Dem - he is a true definition of a Libertarian.

Pro-abortion, pro-death penalty

Originally OK with the war in Iraq, now thinks better of it

Dislikes tax cuts and financial irresponsibility

Anti-special rights (feminism, political correctness, etc.)

Basically, socially liberal enough so that the neo-cons hate him, and not sociall pro-active enough to warm the hearts of most Dems.

FS

And you have to love the post 9/11 quote that got him fired:

"Bush should stop calling the terrorists cowards: WE stand back 2000 miles and lob cruise missles. They drive an airplane right into the building. What ever they are, they are not cowards."
 
Originally posted by: Future Shock
Originally posted by: TheSnowman
That is him, I'm guessing you just haven't seen much of the show if you think he is a Democract.
Click to expand...


Mahre is neither a Rep or Dem - he is a true definition of a Libertarian.
Click to expand...

I was going to chime in and say that if you hadn't. From watching the show, I tend to see the same.
 
Originally posted by: Future Shock
The man does have a degree in English from Cornell University - last I looked they did require some basic writing skills to go with that. And he has been employeed as a writer at times in his career...

But what truly is convincing is his ad lib remarks...watching him off the cuff those quips makes you realize that even if he's pre-written half of them, the other half are still pretty amazing.

NB - doesn't it drive the neo-cons crazy that Maher is personally good friends with their pin-up girl, Ann Coultier? That he can take her to dinner, and they can't get a book signed? (Look it up on wikipedia if you don't believe...)

Future Shock
Click to expand...

WHat Pabster and the other knee jerk 'cons meant was "duhhhh, he don agree wit me so duhhh he be dumb...."
 
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