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A joke

X

Xylitol

Diamond Member
A bear walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "What can I get you?"
The bear says, "I'll have a gin...[big pause]... and a tonic."
The bartender goes, "What's with the big pause?"
And the bear says "What can I say, I'm a big bear."

It seems like girls usually find this joke funnier

-Credit to Tim Conway Jr.
 
Originally posted by: Xylitol
A bear walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "What can I get you?"
The bear says, "I'll have a gin...[big pause]... and a tonic."
The bartender goes, "What's with the big pause?"
And the bear says "What can I say, I'm a big bear."

It seems like girls usually find this joke funnier
Click to expand...

It seems like they're just humoring you to make you feel better.
 
Originally posted by: Xylitol
A bear walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "What can I get you?"
The bear says, "I'll have a gin...[big pause]... and a tonic."
The bartender goes, "What's with the big pause?"
And the bear says "What can I say, I'm a big bear."

It seems like girls usually find this joke funnier

-Credit to Tim Conway Jr.
Click to expand...

What's a Tim Conway...

hehe
 
I've heard the last line as "I don't know, I was born with them."

Cracked me up when I first heard it, but I think I was tired and drunk at the time.
 
*groan* that's really bad.
3/10

i've yet to find one as good as the one with the dog falling over. that one was classic.
 
Um, that joke is older than Tim Conway Sr.

Here's my favorite:

A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender "Do you have any grapes?"
The bartender, confused, says "No, we don't sell grapes." The duck then leaves.

The next day, the duck returns and asks "Do you have any grapes?"
The bartender starts to get irritated. "No! We don't sell grapes."

The next day, the duck returns and asks "Do you have any grapes?"
The bartender gets angry. "WE DO NOT sell any damn grapes! Understand???!!!"

The next day, the duck returns and the bartender cuts him off-
"LOOK, IF YOU ASK FOR GODDAMN GRAPES ONE-MORE-TIME, I'M GONNA NAIL YOUR FRICKIN' BILL TO THE WALL! ARE WE CLEAR????!!!!"

The duck pauses, then asks "Do you have any nails?"

The bartender, confused, answers "No..."

The duck then asks "Do you have any grapes?"
 
Oh. Paws.

Duh.

What do you call a bear with no teeth?
-A gummy bear.

How do you make a tissue dance?
-Put a little boogie in it.

Those 2 work well with the ladies.
 
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