Zero punctuation reviews Halo 3

[Whisper]

Haha, I love that guy's review of Manhunt

 

[Jeff7]

Easy Street
We've Got Hookers


Now that'd be a good slogan for some little Midwest town that only exists to serve motorists passing through on the highway.


Welcome to Craptown
"We've got hookers.®"

 

[Muadib]

Originally posted by: Xanis
That was excellent. :laugh:

 

[bunnyfubbles]

Originally posted by: Aikouka
I thought the mention of not caring about multiplayer was in pretty poor taste. This guy must've been one of the people to buy (errm have some company buy...) Tribes: Vengeance for the wonderful single player action! Most FPS games include single player stories just to placate people and the real meat is in the multiplayer. Is this guy going to diss Quake III Arena's "single player" mode next?

There's a pretty big difference. Tribes has always been about multiplayer. When Vengeance failed to deliver there, it was a huge letdown and basically killed off the franchise.

Halo 1 didn't support online play and thus multiplayer was very limited and not the primary selling point.

Then when we consider Halo 2 and 3's multiplayer is nothing unique or extraordinary (we can actually use your example of Tribes and how that game makes Halo multiplayer look like it was intended for small children). Halo's truest potential has always been in its story driven campaigns (more so with co-op). But the developers can get lazy when a lot of the focus is turned to multiplayer where you don't have to put forth half the effort to get the same quality as you do in a good campaign driven game.

 

[Gothgar]

Originally posted by: MrPickins
For those (like me) who hadn't heard of the guy, here's the rest of his videos.

http://www.escapistmagazine.co...ahtzee%20Croshaw/posts

I haven't laughed that hard in a while... felt like going through Maddox's site for the first time again, haha.

 

[Zim Hosein]

Finally an on-line video where I'm happy I watched it, thanks Demon-Xanth! :beer:

 

[JasonCoder]

Awesome review. And nice closing...

So if in the future we all find ourselves playing captain bland's monotonous adventure in what moments we can spare between toiling in the microsoft off-world mining complex I want you to know I fucking called it.

 

[Raduque]

Originally posted by: Aikouka
I thought the mention of not caring about multiplayer was in pretty poor taste.

I thought it was fine.

I don't give two flying shits about multiplayer.

 

[JasonCoder]

This guy's hilarious. In particular...

I don't recommend doing a Google image search for housewife with safesearch turned off. That was a frightening but instructful afternoon.

 

[Pheran]

Regardless of the quality of Halo 3, that is very funny. "Retarded ewoks" LOL.

 

[sandorski]

ROFL

 

[mb]

Originally posted by: Muadib

Originally posted by: Xanis
That was excellent. :laugh:

:thumbsup::laugh:

 

[adairusmc]

Originally posted by: Raduque

Originally posted by: Aikouka
I thought the mention of not caring about multiplayer was in pretty poor taste.

I thought it was fine.

I don't give two flying shits about multiplayer.

:thumbsup:

 

[Tiamat]

lol

 

[halik]

hilarious, all of his stuff is really funny

 

[MrPickins]

The console rundown is hilarious.

"For awhile it was like Schrödinger's console, in a quantum state of both bricked and unbricked until we finally tried playing something again, and the waveform collapsed."

:laugh:

 

[jagec]

Wow, that guy's amazingly hilarious. It takes a lot to make me laugh these days, but that did it.

 

[Sunner]

Genius!

 

[Nocturnal]

He sounds like the guy who does the world is ending flash movie.

 

[dighn]

Originally posted by: Aikouka
I thought the mention of not caring about multiplayer was in pretty poor taste. This guy must've been one of the people to buy (errm have some company buy...) Tribes: Vengeance for the wonderful single player action! Most FPS games include single player stories just to placate people and the real meat is in the multiplayer. Is this guy going to diss Quake III Arena's "single player" mode next?

Halo 3's advertising was heavily focused on the campaign. It's one of the biggest selling points of the entire series. So it's fair to expect a spectacular single player experience from it.

 

[Throckmorton]

Originally posted by: Nocturnal
He sounds like the guy who does the world is ending flash movie.

That was two American guys...

 

[thegimp03]

Hahah

 

[MazerRackham]

That's good shit.

 

[Aikouka]

Originally posted by: Raduque
I thought it was fine.

I don't give two flying shits about multiplayer.

Ummm congratulations? If you want to review a game, you tend to actually review a game and not say, "well, I hate multiplayer, so I don't even want to play that aspect of the game."

Hell face it, this guy isn't even a reviewer. His "reviews" are nothing more than humorous rants. That's not to say that I don't enjoy said rants, but to take them at face value is poor.

I play FPS games for the multiplayer. People that tend to hate on FPS multiplayer tend to be the people that suck at FPS games.

 

[0roo0roo]

it got a bit tiresome. ok i get it dude, you edited out all the pauses in your speech
4 player coop isn't something to be sneezed at, online play is a significant component. if that were truly the level of an "average" game we'd all be much better off