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Your most shamefull moment

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I once laid a monumental baguette-sized turd in a gas station bathroom. There wasn't a plunger or anything to break it up with to get it to flush. I just kept flushing and flushing and flushing in hopes that the water would break it apart. Someone was knocking on the door, repeatedly. I sensed their escalating sense of urgency and decided to leave it and bolt. As I darted out the door I just said "sorry" to the few guys standing in line without making eye contact and wished for invisibility as I tried to inconspicuously flee from the crime scene.
I never went back to that gas station again.
 
1st day at school, 1st grade, 1st school lunch, I hurled it right back onto the tray, 2 other people hurled at the sight of me hurling, the school nurse called my mom and she had to come bring me home..
 
I threw up on a stripper during a lap dance. The night had started with jagerbombs and ended up with too many irish car bombs. Ah, college. Great times.
 
One time I was at the store and they had like three check outs open for boat loads of customers and... I used the tens items or less line.

Even though I technically had something like 12 items. 🙁
 
i ate a peanut butter sandwich for breakfast at the table with the family

and farted nearly %100 of said sandwich into my pants 5 minutes later 🙁
 
I took a shit so massive in a Walmart toilet once that it overflowed as soon as I flushed it. I was living in the parking lot of said Walmart at the time (waiting on my house to become available and had run out of money for a hotel for another week).
 
Oh C'mon. This forum is full of internet nerds and nary a one story of middle school shame? No swirlees? No atomic wedgies? Nope, none of that. This thread is full of huge turd moments, of which I'm sure the poster's are proud, not embarrassed.

Most embarrassing moment of my life was in 7th grade social studies class. Without being too graphic lets just say that at that time I liked to wear sweatpants and had problems with a certain portion of my body doing things that no 12 year old wants to happen in front of a group of pre-teens who would like no better than to rip a kids ego to shreds faster than a pack of starving piranhas. On the fateful day in question lil Sho'Nuff was being particularly annoying - and then I was called to the front of the class to give a presentation on how a bill becomes a law.
 
lol, some good stuff here. Keep it coming. Be fearless. Remember, none of us are that important. Let it flow. Just let it flow.
 
Sho'Nuff said:
Oh C'mon. This forum is full of internet nerds and nary a one story of middle school shame? No swirlees? No atomic wedgies? Nope, none of that. This thread is full of huge turd moments, of which I'm sure the poster's are proud, not embarrassed.

Most embarrassing moment of my life was in 7th grade social studies class. Without being too graphic lets just say that at that time I liked to wear sweatpants and had problems with a certain portion of my body doing things that no 12 year old wants to happen in front of a group of pre-teens who would like no better than to rip a kids ego to shreds faster than a pack of starving piranhas. On the fateful day in question lil Sho'Nuff was being particularly annoying - and then I was called to the front of the class to give a presentation on how a bill becomes a law.
Click to expand...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nKyihoV9z8

I can hear you getting a boner.
 
I don't recall what grade, maybe like 7 or 8. One of my aunts, who's a bit awkward, decided she'd want to make a nice gesture and buy me lunch and come visit me at the school. My name got called at the intercom and there she was, all 500lbs of her, in her scooter, holding a bag of KFC for me. She had already eaten hers on the way to come see me. They found a little room for us to eat, well, me eat, and her watch. It was in the principal's office and there was a window. Everyone kept looking inside wondering what was happening since here I was eating with her watching me. Was so awkward. Thankfully the school told her to never do that again, and so did my mom. :biggrin: Nice gesture, really poor execution. 😛

I also almost set the class on fire in grade 4 when a science experiment failed, but that's probably more funny than embarrassing.
 
Is it shameful if I literally jizzed in my pants because my high school gf's mom came up stairs to tell us dinner was ready a few seconds before I blew?
 
When I was a freshman in high school, I started feeling pretty sick to my stomach in biology class. I felt all of a sudden like I had to throw up, but my dumb @$$ raised my hand and waited for the teacher to excuse me, which he did on his first glance my direction, stating I was "looking a little green". I made it as far as closing the classroom door before hurling all over the hallway floor, right in front of the door. The whole class heard me, as well as a few nearby classes, and I had to go back in to get my stuff and take it to the office after I finished, but before class was over. That was pretty embarassing for me........
 
Party at a girl classmate's house in the summertime between 3rd and 4th grade. We played spin the bottle. I was a wretched noob at such things. My turn was first, and the bottle miraculously stopped in front of the girl I had a secret crush on.

Not knowing exactly how it was done, I closed my eyes in blissful expectation and leaned into the middle of the circle in her direction for what I expected to be her kiss.

Seconds passed . . . very, very looooooong seconds. Then, the laughter started. 😳
 
Perknose said:
Party at a girl classmate's house in the summertime between 3rd and 4th grade. We played spin the bottle. I was a wretched noob at such things. My turn was first, and the bottle miraculously stopped in front of the girl I had a secret crush on.

Not knowing exactly how it was done, I closed my eyes in blissful expectation and leaned into the middle of the circle in her direction for what I expected to be her kiss.

Seconds passed . . . very, very looooooong seconds. Then, the laughter started. 😳
Click to expand...

Definition of awkward right there...
 
Friend's story:
Went to a Girl Scout Rollerskating Outing and went to use restroom. He was surprised to see urinal in middle of room, but what the heck... Whilst midstream in walks one of the Scouts mothers who quickly backs out of room. After completion and looking around room Friend realizes he just used communal washstand as urinal and he flees building in embarrassment. Call daughter on cell and says meet me in parking lot.
 
A close friend of mine told me something in confidence. Another close friend and I were drinking and I told her what I had been told by the first girl. I, understandably, lost a good friend over that one 🙁
 
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