Your favorite quote from "The office"

[n0tdan]

"Michael Scott: My lord my liege.
Ryan Howard: Yes Michael.
Michael Scott: So I need a little treat for the gang, something to win their affections back.
Ryan Howard: Back? Why is that Michael?
Michael Scott: Well, I ran down Meredith in my car.
Ryan Howard: Ohhhh, did you do this on purpose?
Michael Scott: No, I was being negligent, but she's in the hospital, she's fine, recovering nicely, tiny little crack in her pelvis, but she will be up in...
Ryan Howard: Did this happen on company property?
Michael Scott: Yes. It was on company property with company property. So, double jeopardy. We are fine.
Ryan Howard: I don't think you understand how jeopardy works.
Michael Scott: Oh, right. I'm sorry. What is "we're fine"?
Ryan Howard: Hehhhhh."

 

[FoBoT]

nurgle

Angela: Gift-baskets are... the essence of class and fanciness. They are the ultimate present that a person can receive.
Dwight: What about cash? With cash you can buy whatever you want, including a gift-basket, so... it's kind of the best gift ever.
Jim: What about a gift-basket full of cash?
Andy: Yes! Cash-basket! Nice work, Tuna.

 

[JohnCU]

creed: "i'm not offended by homosexuality. in the 60's i made love to many women, often out doors, in the mud and the rain. it's possible a guy could've slipped in, would've been no way of knowing."

or something like that, i'm quoting from memory

 

[murphy55d]

Dwight: Don’t you want to earn Schrute bucks?
Stanley: No. In fact, I’ll give you a billion Stanley nickels if you never talk to me again.
Dwight: What’s the ratio of Stanley nickels to Schrute bucks?
Stanley: The same as the ratio of unicorns to leprechauns.

 

[Printer Bandit]

"that's what she said"

 

[coldmeat]

Oscar meyer weiner lover.

Just saw that episode the other night.

 

[slsmnaz]

Michael: Guys - meat it’s what’s for dinner. Who wants some man meat?

Dwight: I want some man meat!

Jim: Dwight wants your man meat.

Michael: Well then my man meat he shall have.

or

Dwight: And just as you have planted your seed in the ground, I am going to plant my seed in you.

and probably because those were on recently

 

[BTRY B 529th FA BN]

i am fucking loving this show more and more!!!

i am sorry, what is I am liking this show more and more?

 

[yh125d]

Angela: [on phone] Hello? Hello?
Andy: What is wrong with you?
Oscar: Why won't you do Andy?
Angela: What?
Andy: That was Oscar and he wants to know why you won't do me and I think it's a valid question.
Angela: Are you drunk?
Andy: This is Andy Bernard!
Angela: I know who this is!
Andy: I wanna take you to sex school.
Angela: What?
Dwight: [on phone] Who is that, Monkey?
Andy: Is somebody there?
Angela: Are you drunk?
Andy: I have needs.
Angela: We will discuss this later.
Andy: Naked.
Angela: What?
Andy: We'll discuss it later naked. I want to see you naked.

 

[gar3555]

Michael: Abraham Lincoln once said, if you are a racist I will attack you with the north.

 

[brblx]

'spin move!'

 

[mcveigh]

Dwight: Don’t you want to earn Schrute bucks?
Stanley: No. In fact, I’ll give you a billion Stanley nickels if you never talk to me again.
Dwight: What’s the ratio of Stanley nickels to Schrute bucks?
Stanley: The same as the ratio of unicorns to leprechauns.

mine too

 

[BTRY B 529th FA BN]

lol

 

[Chriscross3234]

"We all came into this room and gave you a golden shower. Well you know what? Where's my golden shower, Phyllis?" ~ Michael Gary Scott

 

[BTRY B 529th FA BN]

http://www.theofficequotes.com/

 

[immy85]

there are so many

Dwight: [bringing in a dead goose] I accidentally ran over it. It's a Christmas miracle!
Toby: C'mon, Dwight, we talked about this: no dead animals in the office.

 

[GeneValgene]

Kevin: Sweep the leg.

 

[tboo]

"Oscar is a douche"

 

[SpiderX]

"The eyes are the groin of the head"

 

[M0oG0oGaiPan]

Do I want to be feared or loved? Um... easy, both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.

 

[moshquerade]

creed: "i'm not offended by homosexuality. in the 60's i made love to many women, often out doors, in the mud and the rain. it's possible a guy could've slipped in, would've been no way of knowing."

or something like that, i'm quoting from memory

I came in here to post this.

When I heard Creed say that I about pissed my pants.