Your favorite joke
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SpunkyJones
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- Apr 1, 2004
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ViviTheMage
Lifer
ondarkness
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- Nov 10, 2004
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bear goes into a bar.
bartender says, " whats it gonna be bear?"
Bear replyes, " Let me have a, um........................................... Let me have a shot of Jack."
Bartender says, "Sure, .. but why the big pause?"
Bear says, "Because I'm a BEAR!" *SHOWS PAWS-
hehe
bartender says, " whats it gonna be bear?"
Bear replyes, " Let me have a, um........................................... Let me have a shot of Jack."
Bartender says, "Sure, .. but why the big pause?"
Bear says, "Because I'm a BEAR!" *SHOWS PAWS-
hehe
A guy and a girl were laying in bed after a marathon session of sex.
The girl turns to the guy and says, "I think you might be a pedophile."
The guy looks utterly shocked and says to the girl, "A PEDOPHILE!?! That's a mighty big word for an 8-year old."
HA HA HA!! Makes me lol every time.
The girl turns to the guy and says, "I think you might be a pedophile."
The guy looks utterly shocked and says to the girl, "A PEDOPHILE!?! That's a mighty big word for an 8-year old."
HA HA HA!! Makes me lol every time.
acheron
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- May 27, 2008
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:thumbsup:
A man went to South America to take a hike through the jungle. He hired a native guide to take him around. Before leaving on their hike, the guide warned the man about the dangers they could encounter in the jungle.
After describing the dangerous snakes, panther and other large animals, and the insects, the guide got to his final warning.
"The most dangerous of all is the foo bird," the guide said.
"Why is it so dangerous?" asked the man.
"It is very territorial, and if you go near it, or walk under a tree where it lives, it will relieve itself on you."
The man looked puzzled and said, "Well, that doesn't sound very pleasant, but why is it dangerous?"
"There's more. You can't wipe off the foo bird feces, or it will cause a chemical reaction that will instantly kill you."
The man thought this sounded highly unlikely, so paid it little mind.
They left for their hike. The native guide was able to keep them safe from the animals and snakes, but a few hours into the hike, he stopped.
"Don't move! I think you're under a foo bird nest!" he said to the man.
The man didn't stop moving in time, and felt a glob of foo bird feces hit him on the top of his head. Before the native guide could say or do anything, the man reached up and wiped it off. Sure enough, he dropped dead instantly.
Moral: If the foo shits, wear it.
ondarkness
Platinum Member
- Nov 10, 2004
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Originally posted by: Electric Amish
A guy and a girl were laying in bed after a marathon session of sex.
The girl turns to the guy and says, "I think you might be a pedophile."
The guy looks utterly shocked and says to the girl, "A PEDOPHILE!?! That's a mighty big word for an 8-year old."
HA HA HA!! Makes me lol every time.
lol-
I've passed it on.
and will keep on doin it- haha
SphinxnihpS
Diamond Member
- Feb 17, 2005
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The joke Judge Smails tells the Bishop while in the locker room, and the Bishop's pre-punchline response.
SphinxnihpS
Diamond Member
- Feb 17, 2005
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- 91
a girl and five guys are stranded on a desert island
after a week the girl is so ashamed of what she's been doing she commits suicide
after two weeks the guys are so ashamed of what they've been doing they bury her
after a week the girl is so ashamed of what she's been doing she commits suicide
after two weeks the guys are so ashamed of what they've been doing they bury her
SphinxnihpS
Diamond Member
- Feb 17, 2005
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ondarkness
Platinum Member
- Nov 10, 2004
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AstroManLuca
Lifer
- Jun 24, 2004
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Some of these may be repeats but I don't want to go searching through the entire thread again.
There's a priest and a rabbi walking down the street together. The priest sees a young boy up ahead of them, and whispers to the rabbi, "Hey, let's go fuck that little boy." The rabbi responds, "Fuck him? Out of what?"
There's a pedophile leading a little kid out into the woods at night. The kid says, "boy, it sure is scary out here at night." The pedophile responds, "You think you're scared? I have to walk back out of here by myself!"
A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper says, "Why would anyone name a drink Bob?"
There's a priest and a rabbi walking down the street together. The priest sees a young boy up ahead of them, and whispers to the rabbi, "Hey, let's go fuck that little boy." The rabbi responds, "Fuck him? Out of what?"
There's a pedophile leading a little kid out into the woods at night. The kid says, "boy, it sure is scary out here at night." The pedophile responds, "You think you're scared? I have to walk back out of here by myself!"
A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper says, "Why would anyone name a drink Bob?"
This guy loves going hunting.
Every year he asks his wife to go with him and she always says no.
One year, fed up with the no's, he tells her he is sick of her no's and she has 3 choices.
She can either go hunting with him, give him head, or take it up the ass.
She instantly tells him she definitely won't take the third choice, but to give her a few minutes to decide.
He says fine and goes outside to finish packing for the hunting trip.
Upon his return she tells him she will not go hunting, so she begins giving him head.
She almost immediately pulls him out of her mouth and in disgust tells him it tastes like shit.
This is when he informs her that the dog didn't want to go hunting either.
Every year he asks his wife to go with him and she always says no.
One year, fed up with the no's, he tells her he is sick of her no's and she has 3 choices.
She can either go hunting with him, give him head, or take it up the ass.
She instantly tells him she definitely won't take the third choice, but to give her a few minutes to decide.
He says fine and goes outside to finish packing for the hunting trip.
Upon his return she tells him she will not go hunting, so she begins giving him head.
She almost immediately pulls him out of her mouth and in disgust tells him it tastes like shit.
This is when he informs her that the dog didn't want to go hunting either.
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