Young professionals, do you find more use in praise or criticism?

[gorcorps]

This question applies to more than just young folk, but I'll tell you why I'm singling them out.

I myself am a young professional, and am getting up to my first year of the career my education was completed for. I like it and feel like I'm doing well. Well I should be honest... I don't particularly FEEL like I'd doing well, but I'm TOLD I'm doing well. Since I'm told I'm doing well, I just go about my business at that normal pace. However, it's a pace that I consider slow and I believe I can surpass. Yet because of the constant praise I don't want to burn myself out, even though I think I can do better.

While getting a pat on the back is nice, there's something to be said about somebody telling you how you fucked something up. It seems like more often than not I get praised regardless of how much effort I gave something, and I don't know how I feel about that. Are they just going through the motions because I'm newish and they don't want to break my spirit yet? Is this really all they expect given that the other young engineer is widely regarded as a world class fuck up? If they're just saying it to say it I'd rather hear what they don't like so I can work on that. I can't improve if I don't know what specifically I should be improving on. And because of that I'm worried that in a years time I won't have made the progress expected because as far as I knew I was doing great.

I understand we're all supposed to be self motivated and self lead, but IMO that's partially an excuse for lazy management. At times you need to light a fire under people's asses to find out what they're REALLY capable of, just to get a better judge on if their normal pace is actually working fairly hard or if it really is slacking off for them. Whatever... maybe I should just shut up and quit worrying about it like a child.

The management at my stable, rewarding job doesn't challenge me enough.
/firstworldproblems

 

[Spikesoldier]

maybe objectively you were doing well compared to your (previous) peers

 

[Udgnim]

praise = I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing

monetary praise = actually being appreciated for what I'm doing

criticism = what I can do better to improve

 

[gophins72]

praise = I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing

monetary praise = actually being appreciated for what I'm doing

criticism = what I can do better to improve

agree with this, they aren't all mutually exclusive.

 

[mjrpes3]

Praise is relative. Where I work we've had some mediocre employees. So the ones who maybe aren't exceptional but can at least learn and follow systems, not to mention go at it with a positive attitude, are praised highly.

 

[Mr. Pedantic]

Criticism. It's nice to have achievements and ability recognized once in a while, but I'm more concerned about helping patients. And if nobody ever tells me how, or even if I screw up, then I won't ever improve. But I've noticed that people higher up the heirarchy have often forgotten what it's like to be in a junior, starting-out kind of situation and what you know and don't know. So sometimes I'll get the feeling that people are heaping unreasonably high expectations on me, and other times I'll get the feeling that they're patronising me and my ability, where it's most likely just that they've forgotten what they knew at this level, or they had different training when they were younger.

 

[Baptismbyfire]

It depends on who it's coming from. If it is that guy who says good things about everyone, the praise doesn't mean much, and the same for criticisms.

 

[AreaCode707]

Praise helps me not be neurotic so I appreciate it. Only praise makes me neurotic. I balance this by asking frequently, "do you see any areas in which I can improve?" or "what could I have done to make the project even better?" It converts criticism into feedback, delivered without sting or political impact. I don't always get an answer but the route is always open and I've never had anyone that didn't appreciate it.

 

[arcenite]

Both are equally effective.

Praise tells you what to do again.
Criticism tells you what you need to change in order to turn it into praise.

 

[darkswordsman17]

Praise helps me not be neurotic so I appreciate it. Only praise makes me neurotic. I balance this by asking frequently, "do you see any areas in which I can improve?" or "what could I have done to make the project even better?" It converts criticism into feedback, delivered without sting or political impact. I don't always get an answer but the route is always open and I've never had anyone that didn't appreciate it.

We can tell. :biggrin:

 

[rcpratt]

I kind of feel similarly with my current work situation. I know I'm good at my job, and I know my bosses think I'm good at my job, but I sometimes feel like that when I don't do something as well as I'd like or as well as I could, I still don't receive much (or any) criticism. Praise is all good and everything, but I'd like to hear some honest opinions when things don't go as well as planned. Or maybe they just truly have expectations below mine.

 

[Rage187]

When my kid started to potty train, we would reward her with M&Ms every time she made it. When she didn't, we told her at least she tried.

As we kept working on it, eventually the M&Ms went away. We also showed more disappointment when she didn't make it.


Guess what? Your being potty trained. They'll tell you how awesome you are right now so you don't get discouraged but eventually more will be expected out of you and the attaboys will go away.

It is a management concept.

 

[gorcorps]

When my kid started to potty train, we would reward her with M&Ms every time she made it. When she didn't, we told her at least she tried.

As we kept working on it, eventually the M&Ms went away. We also showed more disappointment when she didn't make it.


Guess what? Your being potty trained. They'll tell you how awesome you are right now so you don't get discouraged but eventually more will be expected out of you and the attaboys will go away.

It is a management concept.

I'm getting gyped... I haven't gotten a single m&m

 

[dbk]

praise.. I need that boost

 

[Gibson486]

Well, you need a mix of both. It's something that my previous company was not good at. However, I always attributed it to them (them being people outside my immediate group) just not liking me. In the end, it seemed like all I got was criticism and I thought lots of times I was blamed simply because I was the new person there. I mean really, should you be pissed at me b/c you under budgeted the project and by the time it got to me, you not only changed scope, but you also had no budget left? Man, that job really killed my spirits.

 

[RearAdmiral]

It all depends on who it is coming from. Each person/generation has a different way of giving praise and criticism.

The less my managers talk to me the better. Most of them stink and have no idea what is going on.

 

[DominionSeraph]

The management at my stable, rewarding job doesn't challenge me enough.

You're probably missing the point of the praise. A young professional lacks the perspective to tell him how much work is actually needed, so they tend to overdo -- they'll go "More more more," even into a company that has an established and stable customer base and so all it requires is the day-in and day-out work of maintaining its supply. The people praising you are probably just trying to tell you that you burning yourself up is out of place given the context, and so you should slow down and just slot into the place they hired you for.

 

[brandonb]

Now that I'm older, 35, I can honestly say that if people tell you that you are doing a good job, they are actually trying to motivate you into doing a better job by making you feel good about yourself.

No news is good news. If you hear good news, there is another reason.

Here is a phrase to think about:

"Blowing smoke up your ass."

 

[Macamus Prime]

When you wake up in the morning, write the word 'WHORE' (backwards) on your forehead with lipstick and stare in the mirror. Smear some lipstick and eyeliner all over your face. Then just smack yourself screaming how worthless and dirty you are.

If you have trouble with the beating part, you can hire someone.

However, it's a pace that I consider slow and I believe I can surpass. Yet because of the constant praise I don't want to burn myself out, even though I think I can do better.

Then, you don't need anyone to push you. Welcome to adulthood. Where you can decide how much of a hard worker you can really be.

No one, at your level, can tell you; "this is not good enough". And, frankly - if you are well liked amongst your co-workers and stakeholders, they will love you even when you do fuck up or deliver short.

So, if you want to provide deliverables that surpass what you are currently doing, get to it. No need for someone to shit on you, in order for you to do better.

 

[spidey07]

Managers training I was in said the young ones crave and need constant feed back and positive affirmation.

 

[Imp]

Constructive criticism is what I prefer. I get mostly praise because people are afraid of ruffeling feathers, so I never really know I fucked up or how to be better.

I hate praise actually. I was brought up to be "perfect", so I'm extremely self-critical and a perfectionist. Thus, praise just comes off as phony to me no matter how genuine.

 

[gorcorps]

Managers training I was in said the young ones crave and need constant feed back and positive affirmation.

You know, I took training when I started that was about the differences in generations, and that's what they said about the youngest working generation. That's just as bad as profiling by any other method. These companies are supposed to not discriminate based on age, but apparently can lump us all into one neat little group and assume each group wants to be treated a specific way. Fuck that...

 

[Imp]

Managers training I was in said the young ones crave and need constant feed back and positive affirmation.

That's what every news article says nowadays when they talk about the "young" sub-30 generation. Apparently, we all need praise, ass kissing, gifts, and perks so that we don't quit and move to another company that does... Just give me my damn paycheck.

 

[JS80]

Millenials and women need praise or they will hate their job.

 

[magomago]

Constructive criticism is what I prefer. I get mostly praise because people are afraid of ruffeling feathers, so I never really know I fucked up or how to be better.

I hate praise actually. I was brought up to be "perfect", so I'm extremely self-critical and a perfectionist. Thus, praise just comes off as phony to me no matter how genuine.

Geez must suck to be you