You Know You're In College When.. (Personal, Experienced Jokes)

[vi edit]

You Know You're In College When..

1) a. There are kegs hidden away in the floor shower stalls
1) b. There is a naked man passed out with a dixie cup on his head in the stall next to the keg

2) McDonalds and Burger King are considered delicatessens

3) Porn and beer on Sudays in the RA's room is normal (I was the RA )

4) It's hard to tell if a moaning chick is real or on TV

5) Wearing pants and a clean shirt is "dressing up"

6) laundry is no longer sorted...it is simply "clean or dirty"

7) you find out that certain dryers work if you hit them hard enough, not costing you any money

8) the local liquor store already knows what your're going to buy and doesn't even have to ring it up

9) you consider your tuition as a $17,000 "cover charge"

10) you consume more alcohol by volume than water

 

[astroview]

Oh yea, I can't forget about the strange fear of one's freshman year roomate.

After all he not only would he disappear for weeks on end, but the University required psychiatric care (where he was diagnosed mildly schizophrentic) seemed to be not working after he broke his hand repeatedly punching the closet
:Q

 

[TheBlondOne]

You have to live with a broken toilet for weeks. The maintenance comes and claims they fixed it...but they didn't. So your toilet's still broken. SUCK!!!

 

[GasX]

When you party everyday because:

On Monday you have to ease back into the week
Tuesday Night Fiesta!
Wednesday is humpday
Thursday is the beginning of the weekend
Everyone parties on Friday - duh!
Saturday is the big night of the week
Sunday is still the weekend.

 

[palad]

When the custodian takes away all the toilet paper because all of a sudden, nobody can remember to flush when they take a dump.
When the architecture students are the most popular because they have the coolest rooms.
When you're on the third floor, and you realize the strange noises coming from your air conditioner are squirrels falling off the roof and landing on it.
When you played Ultima 6 and Wing Commander at home, so now you're the floor's computer expert.
When you loan out your deck of cards, then have to throw them away because they come back smelling like week-old cigar smoke.

 

[Looney]

Not too sure if this has been mentioned yet: you throw away tupperware and other dishes because they were too gross to clean

 

[OSUdrunk]

When...

-- You can't wake up for your 10:30 class, but you go to bed at 3AM and get up at 6 AM to get wasted while tailgating before every football game
-- Any class where attendance isn't taken suddenly becomes unimportant
-- Before leaving after taking you back to school, your parents buy you a case of beer
-- You have riots for no real reason and can't wait until the next one
-- You become less picky with women because theyre all the same with the lights off
-- A party consisting of 500 people on a lawn with 50 kegs is considered a small gathering
-- All silverware and condiments come courtesy of the local Wendy's and McDonald's
-- You switch around your schedule so you can share a book with somebody instead of paying $120 for it
-- You switch around your schedule so you can avoid the foreign guy nobody can understand
-- You never start any big project more than 24 hours before it's due
-- You never bother to look back at a hot girl that just walked by because you know another will pass you by in a minute
-- You have a whole collection of fake names and addresses so you can sign up for all the credit cards just for the free shirts
-- You buy a book, start photocopying it at Kinko's, then return it for a full refund, thus saving yourself $50
-- You then spend the aforementioned $50 on beer the next weekend
-- Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Sunday are no longer considered "School Nights"
-- Everything you buy at the grocery store is the store brand because it's 30 cents cheaper
-- You make it look like you're interested in pledging a Frat just to get into their parties, then buy caller ID so you never have to answer their repeated phone calls 2 weeks later
-- Suddenly free t-shirts from various businesses are considered cool to wear to class
-- The easiest way to save money is to go to somebody else's party so you don't have to buy the beer
-- Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday represents 96 hours of straight hangover

I love college. Can't wait for the next home football game (Oct. 6 vs. Northwestern)

astroview: Why'd you goto Case Western? Should've come down to Ohio State, we're better in engineering anyways (and 20K less per yr)

 

[tigerbait]

<< you throw away tupperware and other dishes because they were too gross to clean >>




so true..

 

[yobarman]

<< You never bother to look back at a hot girl that just walked by because you know another will pass you by in a minute >>



HA! NOT TRUE AT MY SCHOOL. if there's a girl walking by who's damn fine, everyone looks

 

[mastertech01]

The student sitting next to you is 45

 

[pamchenko]

good ones osudrunk...hehehe

 

[sohcrates]

<< 9) there is ethernet cable everywhere ... a complete fire hazard but a small price to pay for cheap off campus internet
>>



MAN! this is dead on. we topped off two 500 foot spools this year at my place....it's scary

 

[ProviaFan]

new uses for testing tubes?
all sizes too

Eww, nasty...I can't imagine why somebody would want to have their "personal time" with those.

 

[firestar46]

OSU, you are SO right...but that other one about throwing your dishes out is right too...thank god for paper plates, stowed away in my smuggled packing drum Damn, I love college so much more than high school...

 

[eakers]

1. if you get 4 hours of sleep you are doing well
2. the night before your biology final you get in a study group then decide to take a break and smoke then you end up playing trivial pursuit the whole night where only *1* question on what you were studying comes up and everybody gets it wrong. ((but i still did well in that class))
3. your friends steal a fake deer from someones yard and have it in their room all semester at the end of the semester they take it back ring the door bell and hide as the owner comes out to find it.
4. you fall asleep in the library wake up and go to the coffee house to sleep on the couch
5. you miss the first 15 minutes of class cuz you didnt wake up from the couch in the coffee house
6. someone covers you up with a blanket while you are asleep there and when you wake up you find that there are 2 people beside you asleep under the blanket.

*kat. <-- 4-6 happened to her today.