You are likely a douchebag if..........

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cbrunny

Diamond Member
Oct 12, 2007
6,791
406
126
You own a cat
You think cats are better than dogs
Your e-mail address has the number 69 in it
Your e-mail address has an intentionally misspelled word
Your e-mail address is anything other than your name or nickname
On Facebook, you use your middle name as your last name
You post on Social Media about how you heart various things
You've said the phrase "What is the emoji for [emotion]?" or "I wish there was an emoji for [emotion]" or basically anything with the word emoji. It's emoticon dammit.
You have to travel to "find yourself"
You go away for Reading Week/Spring Break more than one year of college/university
You are an adult with posters on your bedroom walls
 

cbrunny

Diamond Member
Oct 12, 2007
6,791
406
126
You text while driving
You make a phone call without a handsfree while driving
 

Gibsons

Lifer
Aug 14, 2001
12,530
35
91
Oh, the Calvin peeing sticker. Or the Calvin praying sticker, although that one's at least a little ironic.
 

cbrunny

Diamond Member
Oct 12, 2007
6,791
406
126
You think Friends is better than Seinfeld
You are a young teacher in Ontario, or are in a teacher training program in Ontario
You suffer from resting bitch-face, but are a man
Your chest pubes are visible at the top of a button up shirt
You use the term "foodie" ever
You walk your dog without a leash in a public area
You take children to a dog park
Kale is on your shopping list often
 

CZroe

Lifer
Jun 24, 2001
24,195
857
126
They're EVERYWHERE here. Yet, I don't personally know anyone with a life that fits the "Salt Life" mantra.

Any time I see that (daily) I think "Gee. That person went to a beach once and wandered into a surf shop or something and want's me to think it defines them. Cute."
 

CZroe

Lifer
Jun 24, 2001
24,195
857
126
You own a cat
You think cats are better than dogs
Your e-mail address has the number 69 in it
Your e-mail address has an intentionally misspelled word
Your e-mail address is anything other than your name or nickname
On Facebook, you use your middle name as your last name
You post on Social Media about how you heart various things
You've said the phrase "What is the emoji for [emotion]?" or "I wish there was an emoji for [emotion]" or basically anything with the word emoji. It's emoticon dammit.
You have to travel to "find yourself"
You go away for Reading Week/Spring Break more than one year of college/university
You are an adult with posters on your bedroom walls
You need to add "juggalo" and "420" to your email filter. Also, FYI, emoji are not emoticons. Look it up.
 

highland145

Lifer
Oct 12, 2009
43,973
6,338
136
...if you're posting opinions this thread.:colbert: Dickheads.


I bought my wife one as a joke. She must be salt deficient because she eats it straight from the shaker. She takes the salt packet from restaurants to hoard them in her car. Strange but she's mine.

She enjoyed the joke but decided it meant 5:13.

She's pretty cool.:awe:




Oh, and I'm a cohorting asshole.:biggrin:
 

MongGrel

Lifer
Dec 3, 2013
38,466
3,067
121
You own a cat
You think cats are better than dogs
Your e-mail address has the number 69 in it
Your e-mail address has an intentionally misspelled word
Your e-mail address is anything other than your name or nickname
On Facebook, you use your middle name as your last name
You post on Social Media about how you heart various things
You've said the phrase "What is the emoji for [emotion]?" or "I wish there was an emoji for [emotion]" or basically anything with the word emoji. It's emoticon dammit.
You have to travel to "find yourself"
You go away for Reading Week/Spring Break more than one year of college/university
You are an adult with posters on your bedroom walls

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:colbert:
 
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Ns1

No Lifer
Jun 17, 2001
55,420
1,600
126
Men who piss on the seats at public restrooms because they were too lazy to lift up the seat. Seriously, Chinese water torture using the urine of Charlie sheen after a massive drug binge is the only reasonable punishment.
 

pete6032

Diamond Member
Dec 3, 2010
8,173
3,607
136
I'm sittin' here in my North Face and skinny jeans reading this thread.:whiste::'(