- Dec 28, 2001
- 11,391
- 3
- 0
Motherfvcker's gotta go.
Alright, here's the scenario. I had to find a place for the past (spring) semester. I moved in with a few acquaintences of mine, thinking it's not that bad . . . they're a bit messy, but it'll be over in a semester.
Not by a longshot.
The situation's this; I live with 3 other dudes now in a 3-story townhouse (basement, 1st floor, 2nd floor) - those guys are in ninjutsu, so I refer to them as Ninjas, and rightfully so. Well, the head fvcking ninja, walks around like he fvcking owns the place. That'd be fine, except that he's a messy motherfvcker in all the common areas. I've tried yelling, pleading, begging, etc. for him to clean, but he won't budge.
What about the other two, you ask? Well, one's . . . well, frankly, all of them have some sort of dementia I'm guessing;
#1 - one is half the weight of what he's supposed to be, drinks gallons of mountain dew, and never leaves his room. His room is a pig sty. One time, he took out 8 trashbags' worth of garbage out of his room - I couldn't tell the difference. Thankfully, when in the common area, he's clean (partially because he never goes outside other than to work 3rd at Steak and Shake - he got kicked out of school) The same kid thinks it's odd that I find women attractive. He's not gay or anything, but it never occurs to him to get laid. I've also seen him wonder around the apartment murmuring to himself - and answering back. He's 22.
#2 - The other one, well, he's the embodiment of sloth. He also got kicked out of school. He currently attends a community college, and eats once a day. And you know what? That motherfvcker does not cook for himself - all he does is order in pizza and the occasional burger (did I mention that he doesn't eat vegetables or "foreign food" [he won't eat Chinese/Mexican even - not even Taco Bell - and he likes his burger without anything - just the buns and the meat] of any kind?). Oh, you guys might be asking, "how can he afford it?" Well, apparently, in a prior apartment his parents found him 40 pounds lighter because he couldn't be bothered cook/eat for himself. So they make sure he has enough money to eat out if he feels like it. After living with the guy, well, I'm not suprised. he's 24.
Speaking of, none of them use dishes or silverware. Well, in the case that must, they use paper plates, plastic cups, and plastic silverware so that they don't hae to fvcking do the dishes. I've moved in in January - and I've seen some dishes (believe it or not, I guess they cooked something at some point in time - don't get excited - it was frozen pizza) in the sink, there before I moved in, finally get cleaned in March. Well, some of it - the rest are still there. In addition, I have yet to see anyone, besides myself, use the stove.
Honestly, those two aren't that bad - aside from their . . . "quirks", they're generally well-behaved, and clean up after themselves. Now, #3, the head ninja (he's the group leader for his club) - that motherfvcker's got problems. #1 just plain doesn't care because he's in his room all the time, and #2's just a bufoon who's scared of the head ninja - so he gets to walk all over the damn place. He leaves open cans of soda all over the living room. He let piles of pizza boxes just sit there. He never takes out the trash. Whatever he's doing in there, he's leaving little short red hairs all over the bathroom, and I sh!t you not here folks, it's been there so long some pieces have crusted over from some other toiletry that is left open, so it spills onto the countertop. Speaking of, I don't knwo what he's doing, but the trash is overflowing in the bathroom - I don't know what it is, and I don't feel comfortable going near that thing. He calls the landlord whenever the neighbors would play the music a "bit too loud" - of course when the landlord came by, they always "turned it down" - of course, none of us have problems with it (motherfvcker's deaf in one ear - how's he hearing all this?). Everytime he'd see me cook, he'd say something stupid in the line of "food is just for survival" or some other inane sh!t - I asked him why he wouldn't cook once - he said, with a straight face, that cooking is for women. He's 28. It irritated me a bit, but things started getting complicated . . ..
- It got irritating to the point where I would eat in my room and such. Not too much of a bad thing, considering I am always in and out of the apartment anyways, but when the warm weather came, ants would start crawling in to my trash. Suprised, I tell #2 about it, and his reply? "Oh, not again" - he goes upstairs and comes back down with a plastic bag full of bugspray! Motherfvcker's not told about this before I moved in! The same day I find out that their sewage line, connected through *my room*, burst 3 times. Oh, did I mention that the bugs, apprently, come through my room to get to the crap lying in the living room as well?
I was furious, to say the least. I wanted to move out on the spot, but I didn't want to break the contract. I called the landlord, who's somewhat understanding of the situation, and he sprayed the spot right away. That's fine. That was a month or so ago.
Then, a couple weeks ago, it begins to rain - the bathroom ceiling on the first floor begins to leak - I'm like, what's this? It's pretty bad - there's mildew on the ceiling and the cilgin's starting to fall apart, literally. It's been happening for a while, I suspect, but I never paid particular attention because the motherfvckers have fvcked up the place. Well, I call the landlord and let him know what's up. He comes that night and sees it - he says it's not the rain that's doing it, but rather the toilet in the 2nd bathroom is leaking! He just tells us not to use the bathroom on the 2nd floor.
Yesterday, we're sitting on the living room watching TV - I talked to #3 about the pizza boxes and sh!t in the living room a week after I found about the bug infestation, and we almost rolled right there - but suprisingly, he got his sh!t together and the room's moderately clean now - anyhow, I don't talk to the guy anymore, and vice versa, but he just walks up to the bathroom on the 2nd floor, and uses the fvcking toilet.
Needless to say, I'm no longer using the toilet in the apartment.
Now here's the coup de gras - a few days ago in the living room, I see that there's a new computer that's lying there - I'm not too suprised - they're a bunch of computer nerds and #2 is spoiled anyways, plus the fact that it's not mine, so I just let it go without thinking much about it. Well I found out that a kid that we knew needed a place to stay for a week after the end of the semester. #3 goes ahead and says that it's okay to this kid, without asking any of us. Of course, this motherfvcker lies and tells him that we all said that it's okay.
I'm the head instructor of a kids' martial arts class. I also lead the adults class and have private students. In my position I can't afford to plow through him (I've attended his classes before - his group is why some martial arts are called McDojos [of course, this dumbsh!t believes that he's a badass mofo - it's not just me, I've had several accounts of others checking out his class and their opinions of it]), but I'm oh so tempted to right now.
I mean, as much as I harp on #1 and #2, I get along with them. They're good guys and I get along with them. But #3, nothing would bring me greater satisfaction, succor if you will, than the feeling of my fists making his face into putty. I know, ultimately, I'm the idiot for sticking through with this, but damn if this doesn't piss me the fvck off. Only two more weeks . . .. What else is holding me back? Well, the other three are closer friends as well, and since I'm leaving, I don't want to have to deal with living with someone who'd bitch and whine (he's a lousy loser as well) plus, it'd acheive nothing.
Oh, and yeah, I do have pics of the apt. , but they're in my cellphone and my bluetooth dongle is refusing to work at the moment . . ..
cliffs notes:
- I hate my roommate
- The apartment is a piece of sh!t dump
- I'm so very close to sending one of them to the hospital
Alright, here's the scenario. I had to find a place for the past (spring) semester. I moved in with a few acquaintences of mine, thinking it's not that bad . . . they're a bit messy, but it'll be over in a semester.
Not by a longshot.
The situation's this; I live with 3 other dudes now in a 3-story townhouse (basement, 1st floor, 2nd floor) - those guys are in ninjutsu, so I refer to them as Ninjas, and rightfully so. Well, the head fvcking ninja, walks around like he fvcking owns the place. That'd be fine, except that he's a messy motherfvcker in all the common areas. I've tried yelling, pleading, begging, etc. for him to clean, but he won't budge.
What about the other two, you ask? Well, one's . . . well, frankly, all of them have some sort of dementia I'm guessing;
#1 - one is half the weight of what he's supposed to be, drinks gallons of mountain dew, and never leaves his room. His room is a pig sty. One time, he took out 8 trashbags' worth of garbage out of his room - I couldn't tell the difference. Thankfully, when in the common area, he's clean (partially because he never goes outside other than to work 3rd at Steak and Shake - he got kicked out of school) The same kid thinks it's odd that I find women attractive. He's not gay or anything, but it never occurs to him to get laid. I've also seen him wonder around the apartment murmuring to himself - and answering back. He's 22.
#2 - The other one, well, he's the embodiment of sloth. He also got kicked out of school. He currently attends a community college, and eats once a day. And you know what? That motherfvcker does not cook for himself - all he does is order in pizza and the occasional burger (did I mention that he doesn't eat vegetables or "foreign food" [he won't eat Chinese/Mexican even - not even Taco Bell - and he likes his burger without anything - just the buns and the meat] of any kind?). Oh, you guys might be asking, "how can he afford it?" Well, apparently, in a prior apartment his parents found him 40 pounds lighter because he couldn't be bothered cook/eat for himself. So they make sure he has enough money to eat out if he feels like it. After living with the guy, well, I'm not suprised. he's 24.
Speaking of, none of them use dishes or silverware. Well, in the case that must, they use paper plates, plastic cups, and plastic silverware so that they don't hae to fvcking do the dishes. I've moved in in January - and I've seen some dishes (believe it or not, I guess they cooked something at some point in time - don't get excited - it was frozen pizza) in the sink, there before I moved in, finally get cleaned in March. Well, some of it - the rest are still there. In addition, I have yet to see anyone, besides myself, use the stove.
Honestly, those two aren't that bad - aside from their . . . "quirks", they're generally well-behaved, and clean up after themselves. Now, #3, the head ninja (he's the group leader for his club) - that motherfvcker's got problems. #1 just plain doesn't care because he's in his room all the time, and #2's just a bufoon who's scared of the head ninja - so he gets to walk all over the damn place. He leaves open cans of soda all over the living room. He let piles of pizza boxes just sit there. He never takes out the trash. Whatever he's doing in there, he's leaving little short red hairs all over the bathroom, and I sh!t you not here folks, it's been there so long some pieces have crusted over from some other toiletry that is left open, so it spills onto the countertop. Speaking of, I don't knwo what he's doing, but the trash is overflowing in the bathroom - I don't know what it is, and I don't feel comfortable going near that thing. He calls the landlord whenever the neighbors would play the music a "bit too loud" - of course when the landlord came by, they always "turned it down" - of course, none of us have problems with it (motherfvcker's deaf in one ear - how's he hearing all this?). Everytime he'd see me cook, he'd say something stupid in the line of "food is just for survival" or some other inane sh!t - I asked him why he wouldn't cook once - he said, with a straight face, that cooking is for women. He's 28. It irritated me a bit, but things started getting complicated . . ..
- It got irritating to the point where I would eat in my room and such. Not too much of a bad thing, considering I am always in and out of the apartment anyways, but when the warm weather came, ants would start crawling in to my trash. Suprised, I tell #2 about it, and his reply? "Oh, not again" - he goes upstairs and comes back down with a plastic bag full of bugspray! Motherfvcker's not told about this before I moved in! The same day I find out that their sewage line, connected through *my room*, burst 3 times. Oh, did I mention that the bugs, apprently, come through my room to get to the crap lying in the living room as well?
I was furious, to say the least. I wanted to move out on the spot, but I didn't want to break the contract. I called the landlord, who's somewhat understanding of the situation, and he sprayed the spot right away. That's fine. That was a month or so ago.
Then, a couple weeks ago, it begins to rain - the bathroom ceiling on the first floor begins to leak - I'm like, what's this? It's pretty bad - there's mildew on the ceiling and the cilgin's starting to fall apart, literally. It's been happening for a while, I suspect, but I never paid particular attention because the motherfvckers have fvcked up the place. Well, I call the landlord and let him know what's up. He comes that night and sees it - he says it's not the rain that's doing it, but rather the toilet in the 2nd bathroom is leaking! He just tells us not to use the bathroom on the 2nd floor.
Yesterday, we're sitting on the living room watching TV - I talked to #3 about the pizza boxes and sh!t in the living room a week after I found about the bug infestation, and we almost rolled right there - but suprisingly, he got his sh!t together and the room's moderately clean now - anyhow, I don't talk to the guy anymore, and vice versa, but he just walks up to the bathroom on the 2nd floor, and uses the fvcking toilet.
Needless to say, I'm no longer using the toilet in the apartment.
Now here's the coup de gras - a few days ago in the living room, I see that there's a new computer that's lying there - I'm not too suprised - they're a bunch of computer nerds and #2 is spoiled anyways, plus the fact that it's not mine, so I just let it go without thinking much about it. Well I found out that a kid that we knew needed a place to stay for a week after the end of the semester. #3 goes ahead and says that it's okay to this kid, without asking any of us. Of course, this motherfvcker lies and tells him that we all said that it's okay.
I'm the head instructor of a kids' martial arts class. I also lead the adults class and have private students. In my position I can't afford to plow through him (I've attended his classes before - his group is why some martial arts are called McDojos [of course, this dumbsh!t believes that he's a badass mofo - it's not just me, I've had several accounts of others checking out his class and their opinions of it]), but I'm oh so tempted to right now.
I mean, as much as I harp on #1 and #2, I get along with them. They're good guys and I get along with them. But #3, nothing would bring me greater satisfaction, succor if you will, than the feeling of my fists making his face into putty. I know, ultimately, I'm the idiot for sticking through with this, but damn if this doesn't piss me the fvck off. Only two more weeks . . .. What else is holding me back? Well, the other three are closer friends as well, and since I'm leaving, I don't want to have to deal with living with someone who'd bitch and whine (he's a lousy loser as well) plus, it'd acheive nothing.
Oh, and yeah, I do have pics of the apt. , but they're in my cellphone and my bluetooth dongle is refusing to work at the moment . . ..
cliffs notes:
- I hate my roommate
- The apartment is a piece of sh!t dump
- I'm so very close to sending one of them to the hospital
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