YAJT: The Old Lady's "Problem"

[GasX]

There was once a very prim and proper older lady who had a problem with passing gas. Since she came from a generation when people didn't even talk about this kind of problem it took a long time for her to seek help. Finally, however, she was persuaded to consult her family doctor.

After she filled out all the proper forms and had waited about 20 minutes in the waiting room the doctor called her into his office, leaned back in his chair, folded his hands into a steeple and asked her how he could help.

"Doctor," she said, "I have a very bad gas problem. Yesterday afternoon I had lunch with the Secretary of State and his wife and had six, um, er, ahhh... silent gas emissions. Last night I had dinner with the governor and his wife and had four silent gas emissions. Then, while sitting in your waiting room I had five silent gas emissions! Doctor, you've got to help me! What can we do?"

"Well," said the doctor raising his voice a little, "I think the first thing we're going to do is give you a hearing test."

 

[GasX]

Well, since that one didn't fly, I will try another even lousier joke...

A couple in their nineties is having problems remembering things, so they decide to go to the doctor for a checkup. The doctor tells them that they are physically okay but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember. Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair.

Wife: "Where are you going dear?"

Husband: "To the kitchen"

Wife: "Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?"

Husband: "Sure."

Wife: "Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?"

Husband: "No, I can remember that!"

Wife: "Well, I'd like some strawberries on top. You'd better write it down 'cause I know you'll forget it."

Husband: "I can remember that! You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries."

Wife: "I'd also like whipped cream. Now I'm certain you'll forget that, so you'd better write it down."

Husband: "I don't need to write it down. I can remember that! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream!"

He then grumbles all the way to the kitchen. After about 20 minutes the old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs.

She stares at the plate for a moment and says, "Where's my toast? "

 

[maziwanka]

hahhaha

 

[mitaiwan82]

haha

/pity chuckle

 

[Nohr]

lol those were both good. :thumbsup: