yagt: to lie and to whom?

[slackerinabox]

this one it less melodramatic that most of them - i need quick advice before I call one girl to cancel.

I met two girls recently - hung out with one on friday (girl #1) and hung out with the other yesterday. I usually take things really slow to avoid screwing things up by seeming desperate, so I didn't hook up/make out with any of these girls the first time and was saving it for the 2nd time we meet up. I made plans with girl #1 that I forgot about. Girl #2 called me today and asked if wanted to see a dvd. I accepted but forgot about girl #1 until now.

Things with girl #2 went better (she wanted me to kiss her but I resisted saying "you're drunk - let's pick this up later when you're sober) but girl #1 is a cool girl. I don't want to cancel with her so do I tell #2 that I:
A) Have plans I forgot about and admit to it being a date if she digs or
B) Lie. Say I'm busy or something

I've never lied but, well, my past dating history sucks enough that I think that maybe I should have!

 

[Dragoon42]

C. Stop looking for advice on women from ATOT

entertaining, but the fact that I know this isn't your first YAGT, just seems really pathetic =(

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: Dragoon42
C. Stop looking for advice on women from ATOT

most of my friends are girls are gay - I have no where to turn to for the male perspective!

 

[thespeakerbox]

invite both to come over. If they both dont agree, start looking for girl #3

 

[Dragoon42]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: Dragoon42
C. Stop looking for advice on women from ATOT

most of my friends are girls are gay - I have no where to turn to for the male perspective!

Here's your solution

A. Think for yourself and learn
B. Keep posting 1000x YAGT

 

[Kelvrick]

I would answer differently if things went bad with girl 1, but since they still went good (not as good as girl 2, but still good), I would think that I'd feel better if I stuck with my commitment with girl 1.

 

[yowolabi]

Figure out which one you want the most. Keep the date with her. Call the other one and tell her you had a prior commitment you totally forgot about and ask to reschedule until 1 day later.

Best thing would be if you cancelled with girl #2 since you don't have to lie. If you say you have a prior commitment, she won't ask what it is.

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: thespeakerbox
invite both to come over. If they both dont agree, start looking for girl #3

Since I'm 25 and not 15, I wouldn't want a girl who was into 3-ways.

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: yowolabi
Best thing would be if you cancelled with girl #2 since you don't have to lie. If you say you have a prior commitment, she won't ask what it is.

Took your advice, which is common sense but common sense doesn't apply to women for the most part! I felt bad - when I called she said "hi sammmy!" in a cute voice and sounded disappointed but not upset. I hope I'm not officially "playing" her - I'm not that guy!

 

[yowolabi]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: thespeakerbox
invite both to come over. If they both dont agree, start looking for girl #3

Since I'm 25 and not 15, I wouldn't want a girl who was into 3-ways.

While I certainly wouldn't insist on it, what's the problem if she likes it?

 

[AbAbber2k]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: thespeakerbox
invite both to come over. If they both dont agree, start looking for girl #3

Since I'm 25 and not 15, I wouldn't want a girl who was into 3-ways.

I hope the is denoting sarcasm. Otherwise you might as well turn in your mancard right now.

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: yowolabi

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: thespeakerbox
invite both to come over. If they both dont agree, start looking for girl #3

Since I'm 25 and not 15, I wouldn't want a girl who was into 3-ways.

While I certainly wouldn't insist on it, what's the problem if she likes it?

Can I be completely honest? ATOT seems to be full of fellows with raging libidos - more power to them! Me? Maybe I'm a square but I can see myself, if ever in a situation with two girls, going insane trying to make sure that they're satisfied and feeling like I'm not capable of such.
Then there's the angle of worrying if the girl likes 3 ways with 2 girls would she ask me for a 3 way with two guys, then I'd have to accept since i don't want to be a hypocrite and I'd have to worry about things rubbing against some guys... things.. then i'd worry if the guy pleased her more than I could and then she ran off and.. yeah.. i'm a basket case.

 

[AbAbber2k]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: yowolabi

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: thespeakerbox
invite both to come over. If they both dont agree, start looking for girl #3

Since I'm 25 and not 15, I wouldn't want a girl who was into 3-ways.

While I certainly wouldn't insist on it, what's the problem if she likes it?

Can I be completely honest? ATOT seems to be full of fellows with raging libidos - more power to them! Me? Maybe I'm a square but I can see myself, if ever in a situation with two girls, going insane trying to make sure that they're satisfied and feeling like I'm not capable of such.
Then there's the angle of worrying if the girl likes 3 ways with 2 girls would she ask me for a 3 way with two guys, then I'd have to accept since i don't want to be a hypocrite and I'd have to worry about things rubbing against some guys... things.. then i'd worry if the guy pleased her more than I could and then she ran off and.. yeah.. i'm a basket case.

WTF

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212
most of my friends are girls are gay - I have no where to turn to for the male perspective!

Maybe that explains things...

 

[rgwalt]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: yowolabi
Best thing would be if you cancelled with girl #2 since you don't have to lie. If you say you have a prior commitment, she won't ask what it is.

Took your advice, which is common sense but common sense doesn't apply to women for the most part! I felt bad - when I called she said "hi sammmy!" in a cute voice and sounded disappointed but not upset. I hope I'm not officially "playing" her - I'm not that guy!

I would have done the same thing, kept the first set of plans because it is the right thing to do. However, when I called girl 2, I would have asked to reschedule and try to get a day/time worked out to see each other again. That way she knows you aren't playing her and she knows you have some level of interest.

R

 

[yowolabi]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: yowolabi
Best thing would be if you cancelled with girl #2 since you don't have to lie. If you say you have a prior commitment, she won't ask what it is.

Took your advice, which is common sense but common sense doesn't apply to women for the most part! I felt bad - when I called she said "hi sammmy!" in a cute voice and sounded disappointed but not upset. I hope I'm not officially "playing" her - I'm not that guy!

There's nothing wrong with dating multiple girls, it's just when you try to make a girl believe she's the only one and that you're more committed to her than you actually are that you're "playing" her. At this point she has no reason to believe that she's the only girl you're seeing. She'll probably suspect that there's another girl or girls, but at this point it'll only make her want you more.

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: rgwalt

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: yowolabi
Best thing would be if you cancelled with girl #2 since you don't have to lie. If you say you have a prior commitment, she won't ask what it is.

Took your advice, which is common sense but common sense doesn't apply to women for the most part! I felt bad - when I called she said "hi sammmy!" in a cute voice and sounded disappointed but not upset. I hope I'm not officially "playing" her - I'm not that guy!

I would have done the same thing, kept the first set of plans because it is the right thing to do. However, when I called girl 2, I would have asked to reschedule and try to get a day/time worked out to see each other again. That way she knows you aren't playing her and she knows you have some level of interest.

R

I thought about it but there's the desperation angle - instead, I said that we should call each other tomorrow to make plans- the first person to call the other person back wins a prize, which she giggled at. I'll call her but not making plans was a good thing I think, if things work well with the girl tonight I don't want to have to cancel with the girl or be a man-ho

 

[bctbct]

I would want to see pics before I ever recommended a 3 way, shame on you guys.

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: yowolabi

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: yowolabi
Best thing would be if you cancelled with girl #2 since you don't have to lie. If you say you have a prior commitment, she won't ask what it is.

Took your advice, which is common sense but common sense doesn't apply to women for the most part! I felt bad - when I called she said "hi sammmy!" in a cute voice and sounded disappointed but not upset. I hope I'm not officially "playing" her - I'm not that guy!

There's nothing wrong with dating multiple girls, it's just when you try to make a girl believe she's the only one and that you're more committed to her than you actually are that you're "playing" her. At this point she has no reason to believe that she's the only girl you're seeing. She'll probably suspect that there's another girl or girls, but at this point it'll only make her want you more.

You're right, I'm sure she's dated multiple people at once as well. I just don't want it to be in her face so I schedule accordingly, i just screwed up this time.

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: bctbct
I would want to see pics before I ever recommended a 3 way, shame on you guys.

i've posted one of their pics before - it's not like my 1,000 yagts feature 1,000 girls - i wish i was that slick

 

[rgwalt]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: rgwalt

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: yowolabi
Best thing would be if you cancelled with girl #2 since you don't have to lie. If you say you have a prior commitment, she won't ask what it is.

Took your advice, which is common sense but common sense doesn't apply to women for the most part! I felt bad - when I called she said "hi sammmy!" in a cute voice and sounded disappointed but not upset. I hope I'm not officially "playing" her - I'm not that guy!

I would have done the same thing, kept the first set of plans because it is the right thing to do. However, when I called girl 2, I would have asked to reschedule and try to get a day/time worked out to see each other again. That way she knows you aren't playing her and she knows you have some level of interest.

R

I thought about it but there's the desperation angle - instead, I said that we should call each other tomorrow to make plans- the first person to call the other person back wins a prize, which she giggled at. I'll call her but not making plans was a good thing I think, if things work well with the girl tonight I don't want to have to cancel with the girl or be a man-ho

I don't think it would have been desperate of you to go ahead and try to make plans when you talked to her. Remember, you are 25. You are likely a busy young man, so double booking occasionally happens. What you want to avoid is a girl thinking you are blowing her off by telling her you have a "previous engagement" and then not suggesting an alternate date/time. If you reverse the situation, and really think about it, if she did the same thing to you and didn't suggest an alternate plan, you would immediately think that she was blowing you off.

There is a difference between being real and normal with a girl and being desperate. Honestly, I think your angle could have come off as desperate... kind of like you were giving her bait to call you back. But it sounds like she thought you were cute, so you are good. You could have rescheduled and left yourself a day in between, just in case you got lucky.

Not trying to crap here, just giving you a different opinion.

R