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YAGT: Social Proof

S

skywalker66

Banned
So guys,

I've thought about it, and I realize that if I am to go around and mack on chicks out in public I am going to need self confidence before doing so. And I've thought about it and there are 2 main things I need to improve on in my life in order to increase self confidence.

1. I obviously wouldnt mind if I looked better. So I will pursue that goal.

2. It would definately help if I had "social proof"

By social proof I mean this: a good group of friends that I hung out with on a regular basis.
As you all know I am a Christian and I like to have friends that share the same beliefs, and all throughout my life I've never really had a good close group of Christian friends. I had a good non-christian friend group in high school, but eventually that kind of fell apart when college started, and now we just hang out occaisionally sometimes over the summer.
I guess its safe to say that I havent really found any new close friends since highschool has ended. So as you can imagine, during the majority of the year, I dont have friends to hang around. And unfortunately a Christian female probably wouldnt be too impressed by the fact that my close friends are non-christian.

And this last year, yall know how I went to a private Christian college, but I didnt really make a tight group of friends there, mainly I think because I didnt put enough time into getting to know people, and also the people I did try getting to know were too stuck up to wanna be with me.

I realize one of the things that really hampers my self confidence is that I don't have a strong group of friends, Christian friends, (which is what I will probably need to have if I am trying to seek after a Christian girl)

Do you guys think that maybe perhaps I am going to be really limited in my confidence towards approaching women and my success with them, until I go out and establish a main group of friends?

I dont know why, but I feel that my success with women will be limited, until I do that.
 
I don't know why you'd need a bunch of dudes with you in order to get a woman, but it can't hurt to have friends.
 
Okay, advice from a Christian female here:

STOP PURSUING GIRLS! Seriously. Because you are so focused on "girls" as an objective, and not one girl because you're attracted to her, you're pretty much worthless as a bf. You seem like a loser because you don't have any other apparent object in life.

Get a life, some hobbies, some interests, some ministries, learn to HONESTLY focus on those things as your top priority, focus on God as your top priority, and you're going to be much more interesting to Christian girls. Make yourself somebody that people of all types like the hang out with and make friends with some females without wondering about dating them (I can tell that you're the type girls avoid because they know showing any friendship at all will lead to an uncomfortable period of you being interested in them regardless of their romantic interest level.)

Take a mental break from females, thinking about sex, thinking about relationships, and learn that there's a little more to life than that.
 
aren't you the person who posts similar topics like this exceedingly? all i can say is i hope you find the thing that is everlasting rather than this nonsence
 
Originally posted by: HotChic
Okay, advice from a Christian female here:

STOP PURSUING GIRLS! Seriously. Because you are so focused on "girls" as an objective, and not one girl because you're attracted to her, you're pretty much worthless as a bf. You seem like a loser because you don't have any other apparent object in life.

Get a life, some hobbies, some interests, some ministries, learn to HONESTLY focus on those things as your top priority, focus on God as your top priority, and you're going to be much more interesting to Christian girls. Make yourself somebody that people of all types like the hang out with and make friends with some females without wondering about dating them (I can tell that you're the type girls avoid because they know showing any friendship at all will lead to an uncomfortable period of you being interested in them regardless of their romantic interest level.)

Take a mental break from females, thinking about sex, thinking about relationships, and learn that there's a little more to life than that.
Click to expand...

Your wisdom will be lost on him.
 
Originally posted by: HotChic
Get a life, some hobbies, some interests, some ministries, learn to HONESTLY focus on those things as your top priority, focus on God as your top priority, and you're going to be much more interesting to Christian girls. Make yourself somebody that people of all types like the hang out with and make friends with some females without wondering about dating them (I can tell that you're the type girls avoid because they know showing any friendship at all will lead to an uncomfortable period of you being interested in them regardless of their romantic interest level.)
Click to expand...
I :heart: this girl. She's giving you the straight truth.

Forget women, they're like tides in the ocean. They'll roll in on their own. Focus on self-betterment solely for the sake of bettering yourself, and it'll come naturally.
 
Originally posted by: skywalker66
And unfortunately a Christian female probably wouldnt be too impressed by the fact that my close friends are non-christian.
Click to expand...

only if she's as unaccepting of others' beliefs as you seem to be.
 
Why are you guys/gals flaming this guy??? He's just making a hypothesis about girls...

Most of you don't know him personally, so you can't really say anything about how he interacts with people and girls...

My explaination for his theory is that if you are a cool personal socially with your own gender, then that should lead you to do well with people of the opposite sex. Anyways... I don't know where I'm going with this... I'm bored.
 
All I have to say is
................./´¯/)
...............,/¯../
............../..../
......../´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
...../'/.../..../......./¨¯\
...('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
....\.................'...../
.....\...\.......... ....·´
.......\..............(
.........\.............\....
 
I had a good non-christian friend group in high school, but eventually that kind of fell apart when college started...
Click to expand...

Did it fall apart right about the time you started declaring all non-christians to be heathens? Or at leat implied it? Thats what happened with my nutball friend. He became religious and started telling me that I'd be going to hell. Apparently what someone else told him in a few months about those the evil in those who didn't believe that a man existed in the sky, mattered more than his own experiences with me over the course of 7 years.
 
Originally posted by: bleeb

Most of you don't know him personally, so you can't really say anything about how he interacts with people and girls...
Click to expand...

We judge people by what they posts, and unfortunately I've read his stuff here and on YAGT and ... well, just like some times I can be a jerk.
 
I honestly don't htink it matters.
Social Proof, unless she doesn't have some friends on her own.

You'll end up spending less time with your "Social Proof" anyways once you start dating.
 
All I have to say is
................./´¯/)
...............,/¯../
............../..../
......../´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
...../'/.../..../......./¨¯
...('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
....\.................'...../
.....\...\.......... ....·´
.......\..............(
.........\.............\....
Click to expand...

Hate to say it, werk, but....

Troll. :thumbsdown::roll:
 
Originally posted by: HotChic

STOP PURSUING GIRLS!
Click to expand...

i'd have to say is the utter truth. most people i know have little success in finding a girl because they are doing simply that, going on a hunt to find a girlfriend. the way i've found 2 of my 3 past girlfriends are simply because i started out as good friends with them, and then along the way we both found each other more interesting than just friends.

if you go out searching (or hunting) for a girlfriend, you arent going to have much success. my advice is to just stop looking for a girlfriend, and just start looking for a good friends you can hang out with all the time (both guys and girls). your friends will introduce you to more people and your social network will just expand. eventually (if its fated, willed by God, whatever you believe) you'll meet someone that you will find a certain connection with, and it can just proceed from there.

i personally just think that if you start out as good friends, a more intimate relationship between you two will be sure to last alot longer than if you just met at a bar and decided to go out on a few dates ...
 
Originally posted by: HotChic
Okay, advice from a Christian female here:

STOP PURSUING GIRLS! Seriously. Because you are so focused on "girls" as an objective, and not one girl because you're attracted to her, you're pretty much worthless as a bf. You seem like a loser because you don't have any other apparent object in life.

Get a life, some hobbies, some interests, some ministries, learn to HONESTLY focus on those things as your top priority, focus on God as your top priority, and you're going to be much more interesting to Christian girls. Make yourself somebody that people of all types like the hang out with and make friends with some females without wondering about dating them (I can tell that you're the type girls avoid because they know showing any friendship at all will lead to an uncomfortable period of you being interested in them regardless of their romantic interest level.)

Take a mental break from females, thinking about sex, thinking about relationships, and learn that there's a little more to life than that.
Click to expand...

:heart: Darn straight!
 
If you're such a hardcore Christian, why dont you go to church. I thought that's where Christian kids meet each other and be holy together
 
The advantage of having a group of friends is it increases the odds of meeting women through networking and parties. That is if Christians go to parties.
 
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