YAGT: Should I call up my ex?

[erub]

Here's the story: I met her thru a mutual friend back in April, I told our mutual friend that I thought she was attractive, got her screename, started talking to her, and hanging out with her. Everything was going well. We hooked up the week of finals, unfortunately we both live in different cities (although we go to the same college). Over the summer we talked every 3-4 days, I found myself thinking about her a lot...I went to go visit her and she came to visit me twice..

Everything was going well, except both of us knew going into the relationship that it was going to be a real long term thing because we have different religions and backgrounds. We get back to school, hang out some, and while our relationship didn't seem to be all that great, it wasn't bad either..then what seems like to be a random day she tells me she is worried that we are getting too close and wants to just be friends. That was almost two weeks ago..she IM'd me once since then, and then I called her and we chatted for about 20 minutes..I still find myself thinking about her, which I think is kinda weird since we weren't all that serious..I understand that long term this relationship wont work out, but I want to be friends with benefits, heh (of course what guy doesn't want that?)

 

[thereds]

No

 

[TMPadmin]

I didn't even read your post but NO. Whatever you said in your post doesn't matter. NO don't call.

<edit> Okay I read it. NO. Don't call.

 

[psydancerqt]

Originally posted by: thereds
No

 

[isasir]

(Speaking from experience)

Trying to be a friend with benefits to someone who's already showing emotional attachment basically means you're not gonna be able to remain just a friend with benefits. Since long term doesn't seem to be an option, you're better off not calling her.

 

[Wuffsunie]

No, definetly not.

From the sounds of things, she dumped you earlier on because she's found someone more compatible and/or more exciting than you.

Dead cause

 

[cheapgoose]

look else where.

 

[MangoTBG]

After speaking with MichaelD for the past few days via PMs....NO


NO

NO

NO

Michael is the fvcking man. Listen to his words.






If it wasn't clear enough. NO

 

[imported_Papi]

wheres the YAGT where buddy was fresh on this one chick and she ended up being a he. That thread rawked!

 

[MartyMcFly3]

Negatory

 

[freakflag]

Even though it sounds like a consolation hump might not be out of the question, I have to say NO.

 

[EXman]

sounds like you want a booty call girl to me.

 

[GermyBoy]

Originally posted by: TMPadmin
I didn't even read your post but NO. Whatever you said in your post doesn't matter. NO don't call. <EDIT>Okay I read it. NO. Don't call.

Wasn't that a waste of your read?

NO don't call.

 

[SethK28]

your in college chicks are a dime a dozen. go find another one that wants what you want

 

[Lamont Burns]

NO.

Get crunk, go out and have fun. ONE fun night regardless of a girl being there in the morning or not, and you will forget ALL about this girl.

Wasting time away with this is not good.

 

[Tetsuo]

No, go find a new one

Get crunk in da club!

 

[Aimster]

I didnt even read this I just read the title and I am going to give you the best answer:

NO NEVER NOT EVEN AN EMAIL.. STAY AWAY.

 

[Yax]

and to top it off with another vote: NO!

If you call her, you'll end up being just a friend. You're already in the friend zone. Just leave it alone.

NO NO NO!

 

[Hammer]

i didnt read the thread but i saw ex in the title, so no.

 

[isaacmacdonald]

there should be polls on these threads. the answer is no.

 

[iotone]

nope.

 

[Ulfwald]

Don't make the mistake I did in college, tying down to one girl.

there were so many young ladies at that school, and i made the mistake of staying with one girl, who eventually tore out my heart and stomped that sucker flat. I got depressed and left school, not giving a sh!t about anything or anyone. Came home to mom and dad and never really recovered from it until I finally kicked myself in the arse about 8 years ago.

 

[Budmantom]

Yes, you know you want to.

 

[pipster]

Originally posted by: erub
I still find myself thinking about her, which I think is kinda weird since we weren't all that serious..

Ha, that's exactly why you still think about her. You didn't get any closure on the situation. Trying to be her friend won't bring that closure. Neither will being it with benefits (even though the compensation for your time could be worth it).

So, these guys are right, don't do it... however, if you decide to ignore us all and go that route anyway, might as well give you some advice.

Trying to be someone's friends with benefits usually involves being to good for her to make her your gf. So, that's how you gotta be. Don't ever admit something like "thinking about her" unless you tell her the outright absolute truth (you think about f___ing her).

The slightest chance that it's not going anywhere, kill it. It's dead. On to the next.

 

[lilFajita]

YES!

haha, kidding, just thought you needed a little variety.

If you want a friends with benefits thing, you have nothing to gain by calling her, because all that would indicate is that you want a relationship. just chit chat with her when she calls, and if it happens, it happens. Realistically though, there's no point in making it worse for either of you