SO I've been with this girl for 10 months now... I am 26 she is 25... we've had our ups and downs... but in short, I've fallen head over heels... and so has she. Things have been absolutely fantastic... however... there is an issue with sex. It is as follows...
She has extreme feelings of guilt from sex.... we first started some 6 months ago... and nearly broke up as a result of it. Everything seemed great from my end... but she was like damn I really didnt want to do that...
What really throws me off about it... is she is so into it, when we do... and every green light in the world is flashing... not a single "no" or "stop" of any kind.
She explains she doesnt want to have sex until we're at least engaged. I say I think thats silly, but if thats how she feels of course I will always respect her desire to not do anything.
Well several times throughout the last 10 months we've had sex anyway... she'll come on really strong and even initiate the sex herself... only to be extremely upset afterwards.
Well she spent virtually the whole month of February away... and just came back this past week.... so I did a welcome home/valentines day makeup.... took her to NYC, got tickets to a broadway show... booked a suite with a jacuzzi... champagne the whole nine yards. Laaate into the night one thing leads to another... and we end up doing the deed again.... and now she is depressed and upset... and I don't know what to do...
it's one thing to stop when someone says no... it's another thing to stop when someone is pushing you for something you actually want... This situation is bound to repeate itself...
Should I just be more of a man... and withhold it for her sake even when she's begging for it...
Understand I am deeply deeply in love with this girl... and engagement... provided we can survive the next couple months is certainly in the near future.
-Max
She has extreme feelings of guilt from sex.... we first started some 6 months ago... and nearly broke up as a result of it. Everything seemed great from my end... but she was like damn I really didnt want to do that...
What really throws me off about it... is she is so into it, when we do... and every green light in the world is flashing... not a single "no" or "stop" of any kind.
She explains she doesnt want to have sex until we're at least engaged. I say I think thats silly, but if thats how she feels of course I will always respect her desire to not do anything.
Well several times throughout the last 10 months we've had sex anyway... she'll come on really strong and even initiate the sex herself... only to be extremely upset afterwards.
Well she spent virtually the whole month of February away... and just came back this past week.... so I did a welcome home/valentines day makeup.... took her to NYC, got tickets to a broadway show... booked a suite with a jacuzzi... champagne the whole nine yards. Laaate into the night one thing leads to another... and we end up doing the deed again.... and now she is depressed and upset... and I don't know what to do...
it's one thing to stop when someone says no... it's another thing to stop when someone is pushing you for something you actually want... This situation is bound to repeate itself...
Should I just be more of a man... and withhold it for her sake even when she's begging for it...
Understand I am deeply deeply in love with this girl... and engagement... provided we can survive the next couple months is certainly in the near future.
-Max
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