YAGT: (Now Ex-GF) Just Called and Said...

PCMarine

Diamond Member
Oct 13, 2002
3,277
0
0
Man what the hell!

My GF just called today and told me that our relationship (since January) just won't work out. This didn't come as a total surprise to me, but I still feel like total crap. Just over the past week or two, I've noticed that she has been a little distant, not being in contact as much as she used to, and just not very friendly to me. However she is very "into" school, and she has her AP exams and finals this week or next, so I assumed that she was just stressed out with studying. However, I now know the truth :(

Our relationship was great before she went on spring break (first week in april), and ever since she came back, she just hasn't been the same.

Back to the phone call, she then said "There was nothing that you or I could have done to change this," which is total bullsh!t. Ever since we started dating, I made sure to keep in contact often and made her feel special, and she initially did the exact same thing. We used to always have a pretty good time, and obviously something I did or didn't do has changed her opinion. Go figure, the girl lets me worry about her for weeks while she stops communicating, and then decides to ditch me with a fricken 30 second phone call.

Finally, I'm a very nice guy, who is a hard worker and a good sense of humor. I guess this just isn't enough :( Nice guys DO finish last these days :(
 

hevnsnt

Lifer
Mar 18, 2000
10,868
1
0
I think at spring break she found out that she is not ready to be tied down.

(or is it that she IS READY to be TIED UP?) (sorry)
 

BCYL

Diamond Member
Jun 7, 2000
7,803
0
71
You should find out what happened to her during spring break... Chances are she screwed another guy...
 

Kelvrick

Lifer
Feb 14, 2001
18,422
5
81
AP tests and spring break. High schoolers, huh? Senior or Junior? If Senior, you guys gonna move apart for college? It probably won't work out anyway.

Better to break it off now, recover and have fun with a ton of friends (and more girls) before you cut it clean and start a new life in college.
 

amoeba

Diamond Member
Aug 7, 2003
3,162
1
0
sounds exactly like what I went through man, except my ex not in high school.

They say that spring is the time for breaking up and also for getting in to new relationships.

Sometimes stuff like this happens, girls usually don't want to be tied down until their late 20s. I'm sure you are taking the break with quite a bit of shock. The important thing now is to just get over her and whatever you do, DON"T CALL HER. ignore her. treat the whole thing as a fling. Besides, you guys only dated for 3 months so don't take it so hard.

Anyways, heres a bit of wisdom, make girls earn your love, don't give it out freely.
 

EmperorOfIceCream

Senior member
Jan 23, 2004
316
0
0
Ever since we started dating, I made sure to keep in contact often and made her feel special, and she initially did the exact same thing.
Somewhere behind this statement lies the real answer to what happened.

The biggest mistake a guy can make is keeping in contact so much that they come off as needy. Also, when she stopped doing things to make you feel special, did you ask her about it? Or did you just ignore it and continue to contact her and make her feel special?
 

Yax

Platinum Member
Feb 11, 2003
2,866
0
0
Originally posted by: PCMarine
Man what the hell!

My GF just called today and told me that our relationship (since January) just won't work out. This didn't come as a total surprise to me, but I still feel like total crap. Just over the past week or two, I've noticed that she has been a little distant, not being in contact as much as she used to, and just not very friendly to me. However she is very "into" school, and she has her AP exams and finals this week or next, so I assumed that she was just stressed out with studying. However, I now know the truth :(

Our relationship was great before she went on spring break (first week in april), and ever since she came back, she just hasn't been the same.

Back to the phone call, she then said "There was nothing that you or I could have done to change this," which is total bullsh!t. Ever since we started dating, I made sure to keep in contact often and made her feel special, and she initially did the exact same thing. We used to always have a pretty good time, and obviously something I did or didn't do has changed her opinion. Go figure, the girl lets me worry about her for weeks while she stops communicating, and then decides to ditch me with a fricken 30 second phone call.

Finally, I'm a very nice guy, who is a hard worker and a good sense of humor. I guess this just isn't enough :( Nice guys DO finish last these days :(

I see two very big mistakes right there already. She's bored of you. Girls are like that, if you're just a nice guy, you're boring. They like bad guys. Guys that they think they can change. If you're already a nice guy, there's nothing to change so the challenge is over.
 

NikPreviousAcct

No Lifer
Aug 15, 2000
52,763
1
0
Originally posted by: PCMarine
Man what the hell!

My GF just called today and told me that our relationship (since January) just won't work out. This didn't come as a total surprise to me, but I still feel like total crap. Just over the past week or two, I've noticed that she has been a little distant, not being in contact as much as she used to, and just not very friendly to me. However she is very "into" school, and she has her AP exams and finals this week or next, so I assumed that she was just stressed out with studying. However, I now know the truth :(

Our relationship was great before she went on spring break (first week in april), and ever since she came back, she just hasn't been the same.

Back to the phone call, she then said "There was nothing that you or I could have done to change this," which is total bullsh!t. Ever since we started dating, I made sure to keep in contact often and made her feel special, and she initially did the exact same thing. We used to always have a pretty good time, and obviously something I did or didn't do has changed her opinion. Go figure, the girl lets me worry about her for weeks while she stops communicating, and then decides to ditch me with a fricken 30 second phone call.

Finally, I'm a very nice guy, who is a hard worker and a good sense of humor. I guess this just isn't enough :( Nice guys DO finish last these days :(

Sounds to me like she found someone else. Good riddance. Don't worry, though; if she can do it to you, she'll do it to him too. Find someone who's not going to leave you. Find someone who's willing to fight through fvcking hell and back to be with you. Then, and only then, do you have any hope for a guarantee of a long-time relationship. Start from there.
 

NikPreviousAcct

No Lifer
Aug 15, 2000
52,763
1
0
Originally posted by: cheapbidder01
Originally posted by: PCMarine
Man what the hell!

My GF just called today and told me that our relationship (since January) just won't work out. This didn't come as a total surprise to me, but I still feel like total crap. Just over the past week or two, I've noticed that she has been a little distant, not being in contact as much as she used to, and just not very friendly to me. However she is very "into" school, and she has her AP exams and finals this week or next, so I assumed that she was just stressed out with studying. However, I now know the truth :(

Our relationship was great before she went on spring break (first week in april), and ever since she came back, she just hasn't been the same.

Back to the phone call, she then said "There was nothing that you or I could have done to change this," which is total bullsh!t. Ever since we started dating, I made sure to keep in contact often and made her feel special, and she initially did the exact same thing. We used to always have a pretty good time, and obviously something I did or didn't do has changed her opinion. Go figure, the girl lets me worry about her for weeks while she stops communicating, and then decides to ditch me with a fricken 30 second phone call.

Finally, I'm a very nice guy, who is a hard worker and a good sense of humor. I guess this just isn't enough :( Nice guys DO finish last these days :(

I see two very big mistakes right there already. She's bored of you. Girls are like that, if you're just a nice guy, you're boring. They like bad guys. Guys that they think they can change. If you're already a nice guy, there's nothing to change so the challenge is over.

Girls are like that, yes. It's time he went looking for a real woman, otherwise known as a lady. Enough with the girlish bullsh|t. If he keeps subjecting himself to it, all it's going to do is get him hurt again and again.
 

PCMarine

Diamond Member
Oct 13, 2002
3,277
0
0
You guys are right on. Yeah she's a Junior in HS, and I knew deep down that it wouldnt work till at most college time, but her breaking it off right now was a surprise.

cheapbidder01 is probably right on the money as well. I am a nice, relatively quiet guy, not really a suave romantic person (although I was learning quickly), who can be pretty funny/outgoing at times. When we first started dating, it was real easy for me to be outgoing and funny and I had her bait, hook and line. But fast forward a month or two, after getting to know her, it was harder to maintain that image.

Now on Spring Break, she told me she met this "really cool" guy out east who is 17 as well, likes the out doors, and is in a rock band (thus kind of an "exciting guy").

This obviously leads me to believe that once she saw that there are guys much more exciting then me, she didn't want anything to do with me. How retarded is that!?

What sucks too, is that I was pretty good friends with her family (esp her brother), and bam now their friendships with me are out the window :(
 

NikPreviousAcct

No Lifer
Aug 15, 2000
52,763
1
0
Originally posted by: PCMarine
You guys are right on. Yeah she's a Junior in HS, and I knew deep down that it wouldnt work till at most college time, but her breaking it off right now was a surprise.

cheapbidder01 is probably right on the money as well. I am a nice, relatively quiet guy, not really a suave romantic person (although I was learning quickly), who can be pretty funny/outgoing at times. When we first started dating, it was real easy for me to be outgoing and funny and I had her bait, hook and line. But fast forward a month or two, after getting to know her, it was harder to maintain that image.

Now on Spring Break, she told me she met this "really cool" guy out east who is 17 as well, likes the out doors, and is in a rock band (thus kind of an "exciting guy").

This obviously leads me to believe that once she saw that there are guys much more exciting then me, she didn't want anything to do with me. How retarded is that!?

What sucks too, is that I was pretty good friends with her family (esp her brother), and bam now their friendships with me are out the window :(

Good thing she left you now instead of leaving you after getting married. Keeping a relationship for a few months isn't hard. Try several years. Try fighting and doing your damndest for your loved mate and the relationship that you share, only to have her spit it back in your face.

Be happy that you weren't that attached. It will make it easier when you move on with life.
 

ivol07

Golden Member
Jun 25, 2002
1,475
0
0
I say just let it go man. If you hooked up with her you should be able to do it again. You're only in highschool, you still have a whole life to live.

And if you like to hang out with her brother or whatever keep doing it. There is no reason to not stay friends.
 

Whisper

Diamond Member
Feb 25, 2000
5,394
2
81
First three months are the honeymoon period. Lots of relationships end during or after that time; it's just a part of life. Just move on, find someone new, and learn more about yourself with each girlfriend that you find.
 

KarenMarie

Elite Member
Sep 20, 2003
14,372
6
81
Finally, I'm a very nice guy, who is a hard worker and a good sense of humor. I guess this just isn't enough Nice guys DO finish last these days

No, nice guys get kicked around a bit, then end up with someone who loves, appreciates and takes care of them.
Be patient!
:) :)
 

NikPreviousAcct

No Lifer
Aug 15, 2000
52,763
1
0
Originally posted by: ivol07
I say just let it go man. If you hooked up with her you should be able to do it again. You're only in highschool, you still have a whole life to live.

And if you like to hang out with her brother or whatever keep doing it. There is no reason to not stay friends.

Who wants to hook up with someone like that again? It's like going YEAH! HURT ME! HURT ME AGAIN! YAY!!!! I'M A STUPID IN-LOVE GULLIBLE MALE WHO LISTENS TO HIS FVCKING HEART INSTEAD OF HIS BRAIN!!! I DESERVE MY HEART BREAK!!!!!

:|


GRR...
 

NikPreviousAcct

No Lifer
Aug 15, 2000
52,763
1
0
Originally posted by: KarenMarie
Finally, I'm a very nice guy, who is a hard worker and a good sense of humor. I guess this just isn't enough Nice guys DO finish last these days

No, nice guys get kicked around a bit, then end up with someone who loves, appreciates and takes care of them.
Be patient!
:) :)

Kicked around is an understatement. And not all "nice guys" are willing to open their very soul again to someone for fear of being hurt, yet again.
 

Yax

Platinum Member
Feb 11, 2003
2,866
0
0
Don't worry kid, at your age, its all about gettin laid. Be as big of a jerk as you can. Cheat on them, even with their friends. Do all you can. You don't want to be thinking about gettin serious and getting married and such at that age.

When you're old enough, you can find time to be a nice guy.
 

NikPreviousAcct

No Lifer
Aug 15, 2000
52,763
1
0
Originally posted by: cheapbidder01
Don't worry kid, at your age, its all about gettin laid. Be as big of a jerk as you can. Cheat on them, even with their friends. Do all you can. You don't want to be thinking about gettin serious and getting married and such at that age.

When you're old enough, you can find time to be a nice guy.

:Q Yeah, that's it! Ruin the building blocks for the rest of your life! No matter how hard you jump into habbit or mindset, at some point in life you MAGICALLY pop out of it and have a perfect life! :roll:


I hope Cheapbidder01's post was sarcastic...
 

PCMarine

Diamond Member
Oct 13, 2002
3,277
0
0
Sorry if I'm beating a dead horse into the ground, but this is why this sudden breakup feels like a punch in the stomach.

This was an email she sent to me late feb/early march.

You are a remarkable guy, Matt <edited out inside joke>... You?re incredibly hard-working and I find that to be a truly admirable trait. I?ve never seen someone so dedicated to his job and so willing to help out his parents. And you?re really an interesting, intelligent guy?you easily keep up a great conversation and you are so articulate when you speak. Plus, you have a wonderful sense of humor, so I can?t help but be perpetually smiling when I?m around you. :] You?re honestly the kindest, most thoughtful, and most considerate guy I?ve ever met and I?m so lucky to be able to call you my boyfriend?I look forward to every time I have to spend with you. You know, every girl imagines their first kiss to be with Prince Charming, the perfect guy, and I?m so happy to know that mine was. In my heart, I had ! no hesitation or second thoughts about it (although it may have seemed just the opposite) and I couldn?t help but think about you all day today. I really like you, Matt, and I love spending time with you, so never once doubt yourself because I never do.

God damn... girls make me sick!