yagt: marriage related...

[Nitemare]

You both love each other, so why not?


Korean though...uggh, is she Materialistic?

 

[PanzerIV]

Semidevil, I think there is some great advice and experience in this thread. I haven't had this happen to me but I will say make 100% sure that this is what you want to do and not what anybody tells you is right or that you feel you should do out of obligation. In the end that will turn out to be a disaster and cause resentment on both sides.

Sure you'll be losing a lot like you said but you're also possibly gaining something wonderful and that could make you very happy for the rest of your life (hopefully). You've got a lot of thinking and soul searching to do and I hope it works out for the best for both of you.

 

[Rumpltzer]

I have two points to add:

#1 I'm 30. On the day of my 30th birthday, I asked a girl (a foreigner) to marry me.

I dated a girl long distance for two years in high school, and then we went to the same college. I had plans to ask her to marry me (after four years, when I was 21) in the spring of our junio year of undergrad. Instead, she cheated on me and we broke up in the winter. It's a different story.

I'm glad I didn't get engaged when I was 21. That four yeaar relationship is a very distant memory now, and (after several other long-term relationships) I'm glad I didn't marry that girl.

What does this girl major in? Grad school is free for engineers, most scientists, and math people. I know people getting grad degrees in poly-sci and psych who are on a free ride with research and teaching stipends. From what I can tell, paying for non-law, non-med grad school is not hard to figure out.

Don't marry her to keep her in the country. That's not what marriage is about, and chances are high that you'll regret it.

#2 My fiancee is Taiwanese. The standard of living and perception of America is quite similar to that of South Korea. I'm not sure she's "giving up" as much as you perceive.

I'm half Taiwanese, and my family is in Taiwan. My mother is the only one in her family who has left Taiwan. My Taiwanese family is very suspicious that my fiancee is just using me so she can move to the States. Her family thinks she's insane because we have no immediate plans for her to leave Taiwan for at least a year (she owns a business there and it'd be hard for her to just walk away).

I'm trying to point out that leaving home to live in the States is not so much a burden as it may be a goal. Keep it in mind?

Good luck.

 

[Mareg]

Originally posted by: Semidevil
and no, she probably doesn't want to wait....I know her, and she is a very girly girl, she needs love, and care...and can't wait...so.....

... you really sure you want to suffer all your life. I've already been with 3 gf that where mildly to very "girly" and lived litteraly trough hell with these GF. I would really reconsider all of your option solely based on this very disturbing affirmation if I where you !

 

[Azurik]

Hmm... you know, I would have to agree with the other poster. Maybe she does like you, but I smell green card also. She's coming from a relatively poor Asian country... and I've seen many US men fall head over heels too quickly and it ends up in disaster.

This is all scenario of course, and nothing against Asians in general. I am one

Just watch out, we are oppurtunistic

 

[imported_vr6]

Originally posted by: Rumpltzer
I'm trying to point out that leaving home to live in the States is not so much a burden as it may be a goal. Keep it in mind?
Good luck.

and that is the bottom line. I am chinese and i have heard MANY stories of men like you that gets fooled into the marriage so the woman can get their citizenship. Come to think of it someone close to me did that. He was 22, she was 21. They are still together and happy, and i don't forsee them divorcing anytime in the future. So its not always a bad thing, but it is a possibility.

 

[thirdlegstump]

But then again, you don't want a manly manly girl either. S[he]'ll start saying stuff like...."...wut? I could DO wut U could DO fool! BEND OVER BIATCH!!!!"

 

[Bulldog13]

OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT


MY OLDER BROTHER JUST GOT TAKEN BY ONE OF THESE IMMIGRANT WOMAN! BITCH WAS OUTTA THERE THE NEXT DAY.

CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT ? GETTING MARRIED AND LEAVING THE NEXT DAY TO GO ON "VACATION". THE PRE-REQ OF THE VACATION BEING "He can't come".

SHE TRIED TO TAKE ALL THE COPIES OF MARRIAGE CERT, HIS LAPTOP, AND HIS PASSPORT ! ONLY GAVE THEM UP AFTER WE THREATENED TO CALL THE POLICE!

OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT

I AM NOT SAYING SHE IS ONE. MAYBE SHE LOVES YOU! AT 21 DO YOU WANT TO BE FVCKEN MARRIED ?!!!

THAT'S GREAT, LETS START A FAMILY AT 21. DO YOU HAVE ANY CONCEPT OF HOW DIFFICULT THAT IS $$$ WISE? !! DON'T YOU HAVE ANY TOWNIE FRIENDS OR SOMETHING TO POINT OUT AND GO. "THAT S WHY YOU SHOULDN'T GET MARRIED AT 21 AND START A FAMILY."

OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT
OMFG DON'T DO IT