YAGT : How long to wait to call

[DaShen]

Originally posted by: Stefan

Originally posted by: Garth
Personally, I think the idea of abiding by these rigid rules of interaction totally misses the point of achieving a successful interpersonal relationship. The rules do not allow you to BE YOURSELF, but instead set up an artificial standard so that you can in effect "protect yourself from yourself." Implicitly this must mean that you lack confidence, and are to some extent afraid of yourself. Usually, this is not an attribute that women find attractive.

There's no necessary reason why calling the next day would "ruin everything." The question you should be asking yourself is: "why do I want to call her?" If you have a good reason to call her the next day, DO IT! There aren't any cookie-cutter answers to relationship questions, so make up your own mind about what is reasonable. Nobody else knows the nature of your relationship with her thus far better than you and she do.

-Garth

Thank you! At least a few people get it

Rigid rules in relationships don't work, but having guidelines of what to do in most situations do. Sorry, but in most cases calling a girl up the next day will make her think you are needy. If there is a legitimate reason to call, then call, but otherwise why bother. The problem with most of the people that post is that they are too insecure to have a meaningful relationship in the first place, so they stick to these guidelines like a rulebook. People pick it up quite easily when someone is being fake just to impress. But in general good advice is good advice.

 

[Accipiter22]

Originally posted by: DaShen

Originally posted by: Stefan

Originally posted by: Garth
Personally, I think the idea of abiding by these rigid rules of interaction totally misses the point of achieving a successful interpersonal relationship. The rules do not allow you to BE YOURSELF, but instead set up an artificial standard so that you can in effect "protect yourself from yourself." Implicitly this must mean that you lack confidence, and are to some extent afraid of yourself. Usually, this is not an attribute that women find attractive.

There's no necessary reason why calling the next day would "ruin everything." The question you should be asking yourself is: "why do I want to call her?" If you have a good reason to call her the next day, DO IT! There aren't any cookie-cutter answers to relationship questions, so make up your own mind about what is reasonable. Nobody else knows the nature of your relationship with her thus far better than you and she do.

-Garth

Thank you! At least a few people get it

Rigid rules in relationships don't work, but having guidelines of what to do in most situations do. Sorry, but in most cases calling a girl up the next day will make her think you are needy. If there is a legitimate reason to call, then call, but otherwise why bother. The problem with most of the people that post is that they are too insecure to have a meaningful relationship in the first place, so they stick to these guidelines like a rulebook. People pick it up quite easily when someone is being fake just to impress. But in general good advice is good advice.

qft

 

[mrchan]

okay, who in the world voted email????

 

[tweakmm]

Originally posted by: DaShen

Originally posted by: Stefan

Originally posted by: Garth
Personally, I think the idea of abiding by these rigid rules of interaction totally misses the point of achieving a successful interpersonal relationship. The rules do not allow you to BE YOURSELF, but instead set up an artificial standard so that you can in effect "protect yourself from yourself." Implicitly this must mean that you lack confidence, and are to some extent afraid of yourself. Usually, this is not an attribute that women find attractive.

There's no necessary reason why calling the next day would "ruin everything." The question you should be asking yourself is: "why do I want to call her?" If you have a good reason to call her the next day, DO IT! There aren't any cookie-cutter answers to relationship questions, so make up your own mind about what is reasonable. Nobody else knows the nature of your relationship with her thus far better than you and she do.

-Garth

Thank you! At least a few people get it

Rigid rules in relationships don't work, but having guidelines of what to do in most situations do. Sorry, but in most cases calling a girl up the next day will make her think you are needy. If there is a legitimate reason to call, then call, but otherwise why bother. The problem with most of the people that post is that they are too insecure to have a meaningful relationship in the first place, so they stick to these guidelines like a rulebook. People pick it up quite easily when someone is being fake just to impress. But in general good advice is good advice.

:thumbsup:

 

[webcammie]

Originally posted by: Stefan
You guys and your fscking "rules"...

There are no rules. You guys think too much. It's no wonder so many people have so many problems. If a girl likes you, she doesn't care when you call, just that you do.

EXACTLY!

If a girl doesn't like you, you won't score regardless of how smooooth you are. If she does like you, calling her the next day would put a smile on her face! It just shows that you are interested and can't wait to see her again. Waiting a couple of days screams, "I AM FOLLOWING THE RULES," and that itself is just plain pathetic. If you wait too long, she might even think that you can't find anyone better so you are crawling back to her. Seriously, call her WHENEVER you want.

 

[randomlinh]

Originally posted by: Stefan
You guys and your fscking "rules"...

There are no rules. You guys think too much. It's no wonder so many people have so many problems. If a girl likes you, she doesn't care when you call, just that you do.

 

[HamSupLo]

6 days is kinda money

 

[rgwalt]

If you feel that calling the next day is too forward, then wait one more day. Don't wait too long because it shows a lack of interest and the moment may be lost.

R

 

[DaShen]

Originally posted by: webcammie

Originally posted by: Stefan
You guys and your fscking "rules"...

There are no rules. You guys think too much. It's no wonder so many people have so many problems. If a girl likes you, she doesn't care when you call, just that you do.

EXACTLY!

If a girl doesn't like you, you won't score regardless of how smooooth you are. If she does like you, calling her the next day would put a smile on her face! It just shows that you are interested and can't wait to see her again. Waiting a couple of days screams, "I AM FOLLOWING THE RULES," and that itself is just plain pathetic. If you wait too long, she might even think that you can't find anyone better so you are crawling back to her. Seriously, call her WHENEVER you want.

Interesting, how does waiting a couple days cry, I am following the rules? But I would have to agree with your first point. If a guy blows it at the date, the girl isn't unless she is too nice and unexperienced going to reciprocate any feelings when the guy calls. If you are boring on the date, forget about it. If you call up the girl the next day to hang out or do something, fine. But too often when a guy, really likes the girl and calls the next day, even if he was cool on the date, he could blow it by coming off too needy. It is better to cool off for a few days for the guy, too. Just FYI. Guidelines aren't bad in a situation where the guy really "digs" the girl.

Of course if the guy has it all together, best case scenario, it won't matter when he calls. A day, 2, 3, a week... the girl will pick up on the confidence and be attracted to it. NO RULES, JUST RIGHT

 

[eakers]

JUST BE YOURSELF!

if you ignore her for 3 days shes going to think she did something wrong and you don't like her.

 

[crzylgs]

Originally posted by: DannyLove
this is a no brainer. 6 days

DannyLove is right cuz he listens to leykis 101. wait 6 days. these 3 day pussies are predictable.

 

[EyeMWing]

Seems to me that you're friends already. Time delay rules only apply for dating outside a group of friends. Continue as normal.