YAGT: Heartbroken

[raildogg]

There is this girl I like - lets say she is in college and we talk on and off. Whenever we see each other we always say hi and she says it first. Anyway, we talk a lot sometimes when we have the time. She is culturally similar to me and I know some of her family, so that helps. Anyway, I had the feeling that there was mutual romantic feelings between us, especially because I heard other people say this.

I always had wanted to tell her how I felt about her - felt so strongly about her. I have never ever felt this way toward another girl in my life. I truly love her and still do. So I asked her if we should go out on a particular day when she and I are off, she said her parents would object to it. Then she said she would not do anything to make her parents upset. She said that she does not date and do other stuff that typical Americans do. Btw, she is from India.

Can a person really feel that strongly about the other person even if that person does not feel that way at all? If so, then I have given my heart anyway.

That kind of saddened me but I kept up the good face and didn't show it. I said no problem because all I want is truth; no use in lying and then ending up in more trouble.

I still kind of feel that she didn't tell me the entire story - but whatever. I am off right now, maybe things will improve. And maybe this happened for the better. At least the weight that was on my heart is off.

 

[Feneant2]

Just tell her you love her.

 

[leftyman]

kidnap her.

 

[DaShen]

Meh, if she is worth it, talk to the parents, or get your parents to talk to her parents.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: raildogg
There is this girl I like - lets say she is in college and we talk on and off. Whenever we see each other we always say hi and she says it first. Anyway, we talk a lot sometimes when we have the time. She is culturally similar to me and I know some of her family, so that helps. Anyway, I had the feeling that there was mutual romantic feelings between us, especially because I heard other people say this.

I always had wanted to tell her how I felt about her - felt so strongly about her. I have never ever felt this way toward another girl in my life. I truly love her and still do. So I asked her if we should go out on a particular day when she and I are off, she said her parents would object to it. Then she said she would not do anything to make her parents upset. She said that she does not date and do other stuff that typical Americans do. Btw, she is from India.

Can a person really feel that strongly about the other person even if that person does not feel that way at all? If so, then I have given my heart anyway.

That kind of saddened me but I kept up the good face and didn't show it. I said no problem because all I want is truth; no use in lying and then ending up in more trouble.

I still kind of feel that she didn't tell me the entire story - but whatever. I am off right now, maybe things will improve. And maybe this happened for the better. At least the weight that was on my heart is off.

are you Indian?

 

[raildogg]

Originally posted by: Feneant2
Just tell her you love her.

I told her I liked her a lot. I didn't say the word "love". I don't think it will make a difference, but who knows. I might see her again today, but I don't want to act desperate and force things. Forcing things is the last thing I want since I want her to be happy - even if shes with someone else.

 

[raildogg]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: raildogg
There is this girl I like - lets say she is in college and we talk on and off. Whenever we see each other we always say hi and she says it first. Anyway, we talk a lot sometimes when we have the time. She is culturally similar to me and I know some of her family, so that helps. Anyway, I had the feeling that there was mutual romantic feelings between us, especially because I heard other people say this.

I always had wanted to tell her how I felt about her - felt so strongly about her. I have never ever felt this way toward another girl in my life. I truly love her and still do. So I asked her if we should go out on a particular day when she and I are off, she said her parents would object to it. Then she said she would not do anything to make her parents upset. She said that she does not date and do other stuff that typical Americans do. Btw, she is from India.

Can a person really feel that strongly about the other person even if that person does not feel that way at all? If so, then I have given my heart anyway.

That kind of saddened me but I kept up the good face and didn't show it. I said no problem because all I want is truth; no use in lying and then ending up in more trouble.

I still kind of feel that she didn't tell me the entire story - but whatever. I am off right now, maybe things will improve. And maybe this happened for the better. At least the weight that was on my heart is off.

are you Indian?

Yes.

 

[raildogg]

The other thing is that she and I have always had those awkward silent moments. When we talk, there is interest on my end and her end but we still have those awkward silent moments. When I was telling her what I felt yesterday, she and I stood there completely silent for about 10 minutes a couple of times. We talked for like an hour and a half and there had to be at least 10 silent moments. Wow.

 

[yowolabi]

Ask her to marry you. Problem solved.

Edit: Unless her parents don't like you in particular, in which case you need to speak to them and try to change their minds, or just forget about her.

 

[pontifex]

yeah, does sound kinda odd what she said about her parents. might just be a way to let you down without hurting your feelings.

better than stringing you along i guess.

 

[Wapp]

Originally posted by: raildogg

Originally posted by: Feneant2
Just tell her you love her.

I told her I liked her a lot. I didn't say the word "love". I don't think it will make a difference, but who knows. I might see her again today, but I don't want to act desperate and force things. Forcing things is the last thing I want since I want her to be happy - even if shes with someone else.

Chicks dig dudes that are forceful.

 

[raildogg]

Originally posted by: yowolabi
Ask her to marry you. Problem solved.

Edit: Unless her parents don't like you in particular, in which case you need to speak to them and try to change their minds, or just forget about her.

Well, I don't want to marry yet and I doubt she wants to marry yet either. I just want to get to know her better outside of the environment we meet. Why do I still love this girl? I have no clue but she is so different. Anyway, she seems to be one of those really good Indian girls that follow what their parents say. Oh well, I hope she is happy because that is all I want. I am sad, heartbroken and will always love her, but there is nothing more I can do.

Thanks guys.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: raildogg

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: raildogg
There is this girl I like - lets say she is in college and we talk on and off. Whenever we see each other we always say hi and she says it first. Anyway, we talk a lot sometimes when we have the time. She is culturally similar to me and I know some of her family, so that helps. Anyway, I had the feeling that there was mutual romantic feelings between us, especially because I heard other people say this.

I always had wanted to tell her how I felt about her - felt so strongly about her. I have never ever felt this way toward another girl in my life. I truly love her and still do. So I asked her if we should go out on a particular day when she and I are off, she said her parents would object to it. Then she said she would not do anything to make her parents upset. She said that she does not date and do other stuff that typical Americans do. Btw, she is from India.

Can a person really feel that strongly about the other person even if that person does not feel that way at all? If so, then I have given my heart anyway.

That kind of saddened me but I kept up the good face and didn't show it. I said no problem because all I want is truth; no use in lying and then ending up in more trouble.

I still kind of feel that she didn't tell me the entire story - but whatever. I am off right now, maybe things will improve. And maybe this happened for the better. At least the weight that was on my heart is off.

are you Indian?

Yes.

well then... she must not like you... sorry. i was going to say that she wouldn't be allowed by her parents to date anyone other than someone of her own Indian heritage, but that's not the case here.

are you just looking for someone who is Indian?

 

[Chryso]

Have your parents get with her parents to arrange a marriage.

 

[raildogg]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: raildogg

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: raildogg
There is this girl I like - lets say she is in college and we talk on and off. Whenever we see each other we always say hi and she says it first. Anyway, we talk a lot sometimes when we have the time. She is culturally similar to me and I know some of her family, so that helps. Anyway, I had the feeling that there was mutual romantic feelings between us, especially because I heard other people say this.

I always had wanted to tell her how I felt about her - felt so strongly about her. I have never ever felt this way toward another girl in my life. I truly love her and still do. So I asked her if we should go out on a particular day when she and I are off, she said her parents would object to it. Then she said she would not do anything to make her parents upset. She said that she does not date and do other stuff that typical Americans do. Btw, she is from India.

Can a person really feel that strongly about the other person even if that person does not feel that way at all? If so, then I have given my heart anyway.

That kind of saddened me but I kept up the good face and didn't show it. I said no problem because all I want is truth; no use in lying and then ending up in more trouble.

I still kind of feel that she didn't tell me the entire story - but whatever. I am off right now, maybe things will improve. And maybe this happened for the better. At least the weight that was on my heart is off.

are you Indian?

Yes.

well then... she must not like you... sorry. i was going to say that she wouldn't be allowed by her parents to date anyone other than someone of her own Indian heritage, but that's not the case here.

are you just looking for someone who is Indian?

I am Indian but not the same religion as her. In India, marriages are based on your caste and religion - both of which are different in my case. I still don't think that matters though but I don't know. Again, I want her happiness and if that means I don't get to have her, so be it.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: raildogg

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: raildogg

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: raildogg
There is this girl I like - lets say she is in college and we talk on and off. Whenever we see each other we always say hi and she says it first. Anyway, we talk a lot sometimes when we have the time. She is culturally similar to me and I know some of her family, so that helps. Anyway, I had the feeling that there was mutual romantic feelings between us, especially because I heard other people say this.

I always had wanted to tell her how I felt about her - felt so strongly about her. I have never ever felt this way toward another girl in my life. I truly love her and still do. So I asked her if we should go out on a particular day when she and I are off, she said her parents would object to it. Then she said she would not do anything to make her parents upset. She said that she does not date and do other stuff that typical Americans do. Btw, she is from India.

Can a person really feel that strongly about the other person even if that person does not feel that way at all? If so, then I have given my heart anyway.

That kind of saddened me but I kept up the good face and didn't show it. I said no problem because all I want is truth; no use in lying and then ending up in more trouble.

I still kind of feel that she didn't tell me the entire story - but whatever. I am off right now, maybe things will improve. And maybe this happened for the better. At least the weight that was on my heart is off.

are you Indian?

Yes.

well then... she must not like you... sorry. i was going to say that she wouldn't be allowed by her parents to date anyone other than someone of her own Indian heritage, but that's not the case here.

are you just looking for someone who is Indian?

I am Indian but not the same religion as her. In India, marriages are based on your caste and religion - both of which are different in my case. I still don't think that matters though but I don't know. Again, I want her happiness and if that means I don't get to have her, so be it.

not trying to be insultive, but i think it's lame that some parents won't allow their children to date/marry outside of their caste or their religion.

 

[MisterJackson]

Odds are you don't "Love" this girl, you're just infatuated/in lust.

And if she cared that much for you then she'd date you, period. I know it's rough to hear, but if she was head over heels for you she'd date you and not tell the rents.

Sounds like a convenient excuse for her to fall back on dude.

Sorry, life sucks like that sometimes.....but we gotta get back up on the horse.

My bet, is if you suddenly become unavailable and not talk to her, period, she'll come to you and want more. Give it a try, what have you got to lose?

 

[necine]

The emo is strong in this one. Talk to her parents.

 

[MmmSkyscraper]

Enough with the nested quotes already! Learn to snip FFS.

 

[Chryso]

Originally posted by: raildogg
I am Indian but not the same religion as her. In India, marriages are based on your caste and religion - both of which are different in my case. I still don't think that matters though but I don't know. Again, I want her happiness and if that means I don't get to have her, so be it.

Is your caste above or below hers? If you are above you may still have a chance.
How do you feel about changing religions?

 

[ScottFern]

ABCD

 

[MisterJackson]

Originally posted by: ScottFern
ABCD

EFG

 

[raildogg]

Mosh, it is the way things are over there. Times are slowly changing but not that much.

MisterJackson, I love this girl because that is what I feel. If that means infatuated then I don't know. I don't think its lust related because I don't do things like that - it is serious stuff or no. I don't like to waste her time or my time, so that is why I don't date. If I like somebody, then I will.

I have not thought about the "suddenly become unavailable" option, but I really don't think it will work. I will try it though. Appreciate the help guys.

 

[ScottFern]

Originally posted by: MisterJackson

Originally posted by: ScottFern
ABCD

EFG

American Born Confused Desi

 

[raildogg]

Originally posted by: Chryso

Originally posted by: raildogg
I am Indian but not the same religion as her. In India, marriages are based on your caste and religion - both of which are different in my case. I still don't think that matters though but I don't know. Again, I want her happiness and if that means I don't get to have her, so be it.

Is your caste above or below hers? If you are above you may still have a chance.
How do you feel about changing religions?

She knows that I respect her religion, because I have an image of one of the holy figures of her religion on my cell phone. I have it not because of her, but just because the photo was in my house and I took it with my camera phone. I visit Sikh temples even though I am a hindu and she knows this. Some of our relatives are Sikh and my parents admire and respect the Sikh religion as well.

As for caste, I think it is similar in terms of level.