NotSoSimple
Senior member
No worries man. Happens to the best of us.
I do commend you for a pretty good laugh though...
I do commend you for a pretty good laugh though...
Originally posted by: bamacre
Originally posted by: Preyhunter
THIS IS WHERE IT BEGAN GOING TO HELL IN A HANDBASKET. We were lying there cuddling when I feel my weenie start to twitch. I?m thinking to myself that this is going to get ugly. I can just imagine getting full wood and embarrassing myself because I don?t have enough room to back away from her so that she doesn?t feel it pressing up against her butt.
Why be embarrassed about it. If that happens, just look at her and smile and say, "uh oh, someone's getting excited." Then you have an option of futhering the intimacy, or allowing her to do so. Otherwise, just blow if off and continue. Trust me, girls have it easier here, and they know it. If you don't show that you are ashamed of it, they won't feel nervous.
Girls love confidence. Live by those three words. Trust me.
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: ohtwell
Well, next time it happens just walk into the bathroom, jerk it in the sink (which probably won't take too long), wash hands and brush teeth, then come back and cuddle. If she asks why you were gone so long, tell her it's because you brushed your teeth.
Either that or walk in the bathroom and say, "Look dick, we'll pork her later. For now, just settle the fvck down and go limp again!"
: ) Amanda
Your knowledge of men is astounding
Originally posted by: monzi
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: ohtwell
Well, next time it happens just walk into the bathroom, jerk it in the sink (which probably won't take too long), wash hands and brush teeth, then come back and cuddle. If she asks why you were gone so long, tell her it's because you brushed your teeth.
Either that or walk in the bathroom and say, "Look dick, we'll pork her later. For now, just settle the fvck down and go limp again!"
: ) Amanda
Your knowledge of men is astounding
Uhhhhh, kinda creepy,.......how you know exactly how we think.
-Monzi
LMAO. You'll be able to go longer the next time, trust me 😉Originally posted by: NutBucket
Lol! 45 seconds! At any rate, nice work on actually following through!
Let?s just say that it was the most kick-@ss 45 seconds of my life.
LOL!!Originally posted by: njmodi
It took me longer to read your post than it did for you to... .ummm... nevermind... 🙂
Update #3 HERE IT IS!!(12/20):
December 18, 2004, will go down in history as one of the best days of my life. It will be known as the day I achieved studliness.
Here?s how it all went down. My gf called me Saturday morning just to chat and stuff because she was home by herself. My gf?s dad owns a restaurant here in town so he?s gone pretty much all the time. Her mom had just left to go do more Christmas shopping and my gf has no brothers or sisters. Being the thinker that I am, I asked her how long her mom was gonna be gone. She thought that it would be a fairly long time because her mom told her that she would be going to one of the malls close to here, then head up to the restaurant for lunch, then go to another mall or outlet mall or some crap. I really don?t remember, but it?s not that important anyway. At that point, I casually asked her if she wanted me to come over so that we could just hang out and talk face to face. She said that was fine with her if I wanted to come over. I told her that I?d be over there after a while and hung up. I hauled @ss to get cleaned up so I could get over there ASAP. I shaved and showered, gelled the hair and eyebrows, and got dressed. I didn?t wear my Halo 2 t-shirt this time cuz I caught so much sh!t over that in my first post. This time, I wore a Cisco t-shirt under a long-sleeve oxford with button down collar. It?s a pretty cool Hilfiger shirt with four different types of plaid panels combined in one shirt. It looks really cool and brings out the color in my eyes. After I applied some Tommy cologne, I snuck into my parents? room and stole a rubber from my dad?s sock drawer then went to my room and grabbed my mp3 mix cd and headed out the door. I had to keep myself from running all the way to her house like I wanted to do because I didn?t want to show up all sweaty and winded.
I rang the doorbell and she opened the door and invited me in. She offered me a drink so I took a Coke. We chatted for a little bit while sitting in her living room and watching Ghost on TV. It was at that part of the movie where Demi kisses the ghost and I said ?I could go for some of that right about now.? She said, ?Go for What?? and I said, ?Some of that lip lovin?.? She leaned in and we started lip locking for a while. Once we stopped, I told her that I brought an mp3 cd with me and we should go into her room to listen to it. She said ok, so we hopped up, I grabbed the cd, and we headed toward her room.
Once we got to her room, I handed her the cd and laid on the bed while she put the cd in the player and started it. I was lying on my side with my head propped up on my hand when she turned around and crawled up on the bed with me. She immediately rolled over and assumed the spooning position in front of me. Well, it wasn?t long before the inevitable happened again. This time, I kept myself from backing off. It was twitching and growing by the second when I leaned in and kissed her on the neck below her right ear. As I was leaned in and pressed against her, my weenie decided to make its presence known and did a hard twitch against her butt. There was no turning back at this point. I said ?Oops, sorry.? She said, ?About what?? and I said ?About that down there.? She said, ?You mean about this?? at about the same time she had reached around and grabbed my crotch through my jeans. That was completely unexpected. I said ?Oh sh!t!? in a high-pitched, but not uncool voice. She asked what was wrong and I told her nothing was wrong, but that I was taken by surprise. She asked if it was a good kind of surprise and I said ?Oh yea. I like those kinds of surprises.? We were making out while she was rubbing on my stuff and I was playing with her bewbies. She got up and said, ?Make yourself comfortable and I?ll be back in a minute? and winked at me, then turned and headed for the bathroom.
Things were starting to look really good for me. I jump off the bed and start stripping off my clothes. I left my socks on because she has hardwood floors and it?s kinda cold in her house. I jumped back on the bed and got under the covers. I pulled the covers up to my chin and waited. And waited. And waited some more. After eternity, she finally reappeared from the bathroom wearing a bathrobe and from what I could tell nothing underneath. The jeans that she had been wearing were not extending past the bottom of the robe. Things were starting to look even better for me. She crawled up on the bed and started kissing me again. She asked, ?Are you naked under there?? and I said ?Buck @ss naked.? She kinda chuckled and asked me if I had put my condom on. I told her no and asked how she knew I had one with me. She said she felt it in my pocket when she was rubbing on my crotchable area. I leaned over to where my jeans were lying on the floor and got the condom out of my pocket. She ?helped? me get it on. I?ll not go into detail about what happened next cuz this isn?t a pornographic story. Let?s just say that it was the most kick-@ss 45 seconds of my life.
Thanks to everyone that gave me the advice that made me confident enough to not run away this time. It has also made all of the ridicule I?ve received over my Halo 2 shirt and weenie twitches well worth it. J0hnnie, if you read this, send me a pm and I?ll tell you how you can get some poon, too.
thats just gotta be quotes a few more times LMAOLet?s just say that it was the most kick-@ss 45 seconds of my life.
Originally posted by: Mandos
Yeah um. I think he meant 45 seconds to get the condom on... I hope....
Let?s just say that it was the most kick-@ss 45 seconds of my life.