YAGT: Best thing to do first: date or meet with mutual friends?

[Ilmater]

Met a girl last week that is apparently friends of two separate groups of my friends. Hit it off, got her number. Now one of those groups of friends (husband and wife) wants the two of us to come over for BBQ some night next week.

Question is, is it better to take her out myself or should I just wait for this?

 

[MiniDoom]

I would have a one on one first date to get to know each other better, and if it goes well do the couple thing on the second date.

 

[Kyanzes]

You could ask her.

 

[essasin]

Take her out before this so it won't be weird if things do not work out. Plus its always good to make a good first impression and show that you will take control and see her again.

 

[JS80]

meet for coffee beforehand and verify she's not a psycho

 

[krunchykrome]

Originally posted by: Ilmater
Met a girl last week that is apparently friends of two separate groups of my friends. Hit it off, got her number. Now one of those groups of friends (husband and wife) wants the two of us to come over for BBQ some night next week.

Question is, is it better to take her out myself or should I just wait for this?

Go out alone first. But do somethig interactive. Don't do dinner and a movie. Casual dinner is fine as long as you do something interactive before or after, like ice skating for example, or fishing.

 

[snoopdoug1]

Originally posted by: krunchykrome

Originally posted by: Ilmater
Met a girl last week that is apparently friends of two separate groups of my friends. Hit it off, got her number. Now one of those groups of friends (husband and wife) wants the two of us to come over for BBQ some night next week.

Question is, is it better to take her out myself or should I just wait for this?

Go out alone first. But do somethig interactive. Don't do dinner and a movie. Casual dinner is fine as long as you do something interactive before or after, like ice skating for example, or fishing.

What he said... if you just do the normal dinner + movie, and there isn't much interaction time, you won't learn a thing about her...

 

[MoPHo]

Originally posted by: snoopdoug1

Originally posted by: krunchykrome

Originally posted by: Ilmater
Met a girl last week that is apparently friends of two separate groups of my friends. Hit it off, got her number. Now one of those groups of friends (husband and wife) wants the two of us to come over for BBQ some night next week.

Question is, is it better to take her out myself or should I just wait for this?

Go out alone first. But do somethig interactive. Don't do dinner and a movie. Casual dinner is fine as long as you do something interactive before or after, like ice skating for example, or fishing.

What he said... if you just do the normal dinner + movie, and there isn't much interaction time, you won't learn a thing about her...

:thumbsup: only thing i would change is fishing...i dunno how much of a date thing that is..

 

[CellarDoor]

Originally posted by: krunchykrome

Originally posted by: Ilmater
Met a girl last week that is apparently friends of two separate groups of my friends. Hit it off, got her number. Now one of those groups of friends (husband and wife) wants the two of us to come over for BBQ some night next week.

Question is, is it better to take her out myself or should I just wait for this?

Go out alone first. But do somethig interactive. Don't do dinner and a movie. Casual dinner is fine as long as you do something interactive before or after, like ice skating for example, or fishing.

^^Excellent point. Go out alone first and do something fun and interactive. A good first date I had was bowling.

 

[j00fek]

Originally posted by: JS80
meet for coffee beforehand and verify she's not a psycho

:thumbsup:

 

[IceBergSLiM]

nah you guys are wrong. This is a perfect "first date" because there isn't a ton of pressure on them and he doesnt have to shell out any money.
The second date you want to be a bit more intimate so you can seal the deal.

 

[IceBergSLiM]

Originally posted by: JS80
meet for coffee beforehand and verify she's not a psycho

he knows she isnt pyscho this isnt a blind date.

 

[DannyLove]

yep. What some have already said.
Go out with her first. No coffee date or lunch date either. See how she is after dinner and with drinks in her system.

danny~!

 

[Lonyo]

Originally posted by: IcebergSlim
nah you guys are wrong. This is a perfect "first date" because there isn't a ton of pressure on them and he doesnt have to shell out any money.
The second date you want to be a bit more intimate so you can seal the deal.

Go for this.
Then go ice skating. (Theoretically you can't lose with ice skating)

 

[IceBergSLiM]

Originally posted by: DannyLove
yep. What some have already said.
Go out with her first. No coffee date or lunch date either. See how she is after dinner and with drinks in her system.

danny~!

r u stupid? you dont take girls out to lavish dinners with drinks. Drinks maybe. No dinner though. They can get wined and dined once the deal has been sealed.

 

[pontifex]

Originally posted by: essasin
Take her out before this so it won't be weird if things do not work out. Plus its always good to make a good first impression and show that you will take control and see her again.

so it won't be weird if they go out together 1st and it doesn't work out but then both show up to the friends bbq?

 

[IceBergSLiM]

Originally posted by: pontifex

Originally posted by: essasin
Take her out before this so it won't be weird if things do not work out. Plus its always good to make a good first impression and show that you will take control and see her again.

so it won't be weird if they go out together 1st and it doesn't work out but then both show up to the friends bbq?

The bbq is perfectt because there are other people around if you are not liking her you can talk to the husband or wife or vice versa. Same thing if you are stuck with soemthing to talk about you can strike up a convo with the other an dthen pul the girl back into it. Way easier and alot less presure to just meet at the dang bbq. why does nobody else see this.

 

[Ilmater]

Originally posted by: IcebergSlim
he knows she isnt pyscho this isnt a blind date.

I appreciate the comment, but in all fairness, until we're married, I won't know for sure if she's psycho or not.

 

[Ilmater]

Originally posted by: Lonyo
Go for this.
Then go ice skating. (Theoretically you can't lose with ice skating)

Ice skating is right out. I don't have size 18 skates, and they don't rent them. Never been because of it.

 

[Riverhound777]

How about a local ballgame? I might do this myself. In the same situation as you, got a number from a girl i hung out with last week who i met through a friend. I'm thinking of asking her to a local tripple A baseball game(cheap, but still fun). Then maybe hanging out with our mutal friends.

 

[pontifex]

Originally posted by: IcebergSlim

Originally posted by: pontifex

Originally posted by: essasin
Take her out before this so it won't be weird if things do not work out. Plus its always good to make a good first impression and show that you will take control and see her again.

so it won't be weird if they go out together 1st and it doesn't work out but then both show up to the friends bbq?

The bbq is perfectt because there are other people around if you are not liking her you can talk to the husband or wife or vice versa. Same thing if you are stuck with soemthing to talk about you can strike up a convo with the other an dthen pul the girl back into it. Way easier and alot less presure to just meet at the dang bbq. why does nobody else see this.

i'm agreeing the bbq is better 1st date

 

[Koing]

Date to see her. Not her and your mutual mates!

You want to get to know her.

If it doesn't work out it won't be weird going to the BBQ. Not as if you have to say much to her. Just be nice and say hi and bye etc. If she isn't mature enough to handle that then wtf...

Koing

 

[Blazin Trav]

NO POLL?!?!?!?

WTFBBQ?!?!?!?

 

[Ilmater]

Originally posted by: Blazin Trav
NO POLL?!?!?!?

WTFBBQ?!?!?!?

You're right, completely ridiculous.

Edit: also, a thought I just had, I've always heard it's better to date just the two of you where you can talk on the first date, but part of me says... I'm in no fvcking hurry. I can just hang out with our two other friends, see if we enjoy it, and go from there. I don't HAVE to get to know her this very weekend. I can see the "pick a place where the two of you can talk" thing if I'm in desperate need to be with someone or to decide yea or nay on this, but I'm not in that position.

 

[IAteYourMother]

Originally posted by: pontifex

Originally posted by: IcebergSlim

Originally posted by: pontifex

Originally posted by: essasin
Take her out before this so it won't be weird if things do not work out. Plus its always good to make a good first impression and show that you will take control and see her again.

so it won't be weird if they go out together 1st and it doesn't work out but then both show up to the friends bbq?

The bbq is perfectt because there are other people around if you are not liking her you can talk to the husband or wife or vice versa. Same thing if you are stuck with soemthing to talk about you can strike up a convo with the other an dthen pul the girl back into it. Way easier and alot less presure to just meet at the dang bbq. why does nobody else see this.

i'm agreeing the bbq is better 1st date