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WWATOTD: Ethics of friendship

E

EyeMWing

Banned
Let's say you have a friend. A VERY close, long-time friend. That alone may require some imagination for some of you. You're 17 or 18, they're 17. Either gender. Lets say they begin to take up an activity of some sort of activity that imminently threatens their life. I don't know, nor do I care what activity you choose. Drugs do not count. Now, if you allow this friend to continue the activity, it will severely damage your friendship with that person, if not destroy it, and actually puts their continued survival as a human being on the line. That means that they could die. You have the option to do the unthinkable: Rat your friend out to their parents and/or the police. Do you do it?

My thoughts will follow after a few replies.
 
Umm. . .can you give us some indication of exactly how dangerous this activity is? Is it skydiving dangerous? Driving on the freeway dangerous? Or skydiving onto the freeway dangerous?

Give us some stats, and a comparable risk activity. Either that, or tell us WTF they're doing.
 
Is what they are doing riskier than drugs?

If they are playing russian roulette for money, I'd say go to the police.

If they've started commuting to work (a high-risk activity), I wouldn't worry about it.
 
Originally posted by: Kibbo
Umm. . .can you give us some indication of exactly how dangerous this activity is? Is it skydiving dangerous? Driving on the freeway dangerous? Or skydiving onto the freeway dangerous?

Give us some stats, and a comparable risk activity. Either that, or tell us WTF they're doing.
Click to expand...

Lets say drug courier dangerous, or if you'd like it to be on a more personal level, repeated suicide attempts. And yes, this is hypothetical. I had to make a similar decision for real, but it wasn't nearly as imminently deadly.
 
Story that could fit the situation.


John and Mike


John is 17 and Mike is 18. They have been friends since childhood. They have become room mates out of a mutual need for money. John has discovered a new fun hobby. He has begun making explosives out of the house hold chemicals that mike buys. He then likes to set fires in small places around the house ontop of tin foil to keep it under control. Mike tells John that he might fall asleep making his lil minifires at night but John loves watching the fires burn. Mike cannot seem to talk John out of this dangerous hobby and he cant afford to move out. John continues to light his minifires.

Mike must now make the choice, potentially save both of their lives by telling the police about John and gettting him put in a mental hospital or to let him continue on and enjoy life and his fires?

If you were Mike, what would you do? Bear in mind once John goes into the mental hospital, he will probably never come out and you will never see your best friend again.
 
Originally posted by: EyeMWing
Originally posted by: Kibbo
Umm. . .can you give us some indication of exactly how dangerous this activity is? Is it skydiving dangerous? Driving on the freeway dangerous? Or skydiving onto the freeway dangerous?

Give us some stats, and a comparable risk activity. Either that, or tell us WTF they're doing.
Click to expand...

Lets say drug courier dangerous, or if you'd like it to be on a more personal level, repeated suicide attempts. And yes, this is hypothetical. I had to make a similar decision for real, but it wasn't nearly as imminently deadly.
Click to expand...

Either way, you're going to lose a friend. The choice is, do you want to lose that friend permanently (I.E. death), or do you want to lose them for a long time/temporarily (them being pissed for you ratting on them, but eventually seeing that you only intended to help).
 
Guess it depends on whether or not said activity is illegal or legal. If it was illegal, I'd give the friend one chance to stop and then go to police. It was legal, then I'd be more inclined to go to the parents. Either way I think there's a very good chance that you'll lose that person as a friend, but then you'd definitely lose your friend if they died from their activity.

edit. apparently I type too slow, see post above
 
Originally posted by: Schadenfroh
Story that could fit the situation.


John and Mike


John is 17 and Mike is 18. They have been friends since childhood. They have become room mates out of a mutual need for money. John has discovered a new fun hobby. He has begun making explosives out of the house hold chemicals that mike buys. He then likes to set fires in small places around the house ontop of tin foil to keep it under control. Mike tells John that he might fall asleep making his lil minifires at night but John loves watching the fires burn. Mike cannot seem to talk John out of this dangerous hobby and he cant afford to move out. John continues to light his minifires.

Mike must now make the choice, potentially save both of their lives by telling the police about John and gettting him put in a mental hospital or to let him continue on and enjoy life and his fires?

If you were Mike, what would you do? Bear in mind once John goes into the mental hospital, he will probably never come out and you will never see your best friend again.
Click to expand...

Have fun in your new white coat John!
 
At any rate, here are my thoughts on the issue: It's better to have no friend than to have a dead friend. In my situation, it did take me a few minutes of soul-searching to commit either way, but it was clear that it should be done. I had a few regrets a few minutes after informing the appropriate authority figures, but I'm now very comfortable with what I did and await the consequences, good and bad.
 
If it's a guy friend, which I would imagine would be the case in the "long term best friend" situation, then I voted No, you can't break the trust.

In my honorific view of the world, there is never any excuse for breaking the trust between two best friends. My best friend could kill someone and I'd go to jail lying for him if that's what he wanted. I'd help him out of any jam, any situation at all. I'd lie to his wife if he were having an affair. There is nothing more important than the trust between two best friends.
 
I would because they are not yet an adult. At 18 I would reconsider, but they are still under the guardianship of their parent and as such the parents should be in the know if something is endangering their child.
 
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