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Would you ever date someone a few years older and who has kids?

H

hongkongfever

Senior member
From a guys point of view, would you date someone a few years older and has kids? Do you think society has become more accepting of single moms or is it still a "tisk tisk?"
 
At my age (20), definitely not. I can't be tied down by that. I don't even want another girlfriend period until I'm sure of what I'm going to do.
 
Few years older, sure. Kids, no fscking way jesus christ are you out of your goddamn mind?
 
I'm an older guy and I wouldn't consider kids unless the female was an outstanding example. I could deal with kids but honestly don't want that hassle unless the woman was really noteworthy and beautiful in some way... I'm talking like Pam Anderson type stuff, otherwise I want a mate with no children from a former bullsh!t relationship which will come back to visit me whether I like it or not. 😛
 
Depends. I have a tendency to avoid women with kids. I usually see them as too much trouble. That is a pretty rough generalization, though.

If she has kids as a result of lots of bad decision making then obviously that is a good indicator to steer clear of her. If she had mulitiple children from different fathers I would absolutely 100% run, not walk, in the opposite direction.

If she has one child I wouldn't pass her up on that alone. Especially if she was responsible and a good mother. If she had a college degree or was seeking one out, could hold down a good job and/or was very intelligent --all indicators of being a responsible adult, then I wouldn't pass her up just because she has a child.

In fact, I'd rather woman with a child than a woman who has many failed relationships (especially long-term). I'd date a single unwed mother before dating a woman with a failed marriage, even.
 
Yes I have...back when I was 19...she was 31 and had 2 kids, it was nothing serious though she just wanted some fun and I wanted to get my end wet....it worked out in the end and after we had our fun, 7 months worth, we went our seperate ways, no questions asked , no problems at all.

If only all relationships where as easy as that one.
 
Older, yes. Kids, hell no. I am not raising someone else's brats only to have the possibility of him wooing the mom back, or suing for custody down the road and having to face that hassle...
 
Olders yes, kids no f0cking way...maybe if I was older but kids are a deal breaker for me.

I was in this situation with the last girl I was seeing. I'm 23, she was 27, dated a few weeks, she drops in that she is a divorcee (totally unexpected, heart sank) and she had a 6yr old daughter (totally speechless)...kid wasn't in the country but it was too much baggage (responsibilities I didn't want to deal with at my point in life) for me to take and she was too serious. Visiting the daughter on holiday?! TF?

I was mulling the idea of continuing to see her but I didn't in the end.

I think your out of your mind if your mid 20's and are comptemplating this idea...but more power to you if you want it and make it work :thumbsup:. I liked her a lot but apparently not enough to continue seeing her. I do feel selfish that I couldn't look over the fact that she had a kid...

Koing
 
Originally posted by: Koing
I liked her a lot but apparently not enough to continue seeing her. I do feel selfish that I couldn't look over the fact that she had a kid...
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If it doesn't fit with what you want out of a relationship, it's good that you finished it before the kid got to know you.

 
Originally posted by: MmmSkyscraper
Originally posted by: Koing
I liked her a lot but apparently not enough to continue seeing her. I do feel selfish that I couldn't look over the fact that she had a kid...
Click to expand...

If it doesn't fit with what you want out of a relationship, it's good that you finished it before the kid got to know you.
Click to expand...

I'm actually amazing with kids (worked at a 3 summer camps, 4th one this year) but would rather not deal with a girl with a kid in a relationship.

Koing
 
Of course. But I'm 34 so things are a bit different for me than for someone who is 18 or 19. Then again when I was 19 I was dating a 26yr old with kids so... *shrug* I guess it depends on the person and what their priorities are.

I have no idea what society thinks because I don't believe in, or pay any attention to, society.
 
I'm 30, and yes. And I'm dating a 31 year old with 2 kids (age 8/7)

In fact, most women I date have kids, and I usually like the kids more than I like the woman I'm dating for the most part. Its odd, but its fairly common with those who date women with kids.
 
older, yes. kids, not sure.

i have a 1 year old niece and i love her to death, but she is a HANDFUL! i'm not sure i'm ready for that. hell, i can barely take care of myself.
 
Depends on the situation. I tend to find older women (not too much older 😛) a bit more mature than your younger ones, so that can be a plus. But kids? I used to be totally against it, but now I'm not sure what I'd do. I think I'd try to take everything into account like some sort of formula of love.
 
Originally posted by: Aikouka
Depends on the situation. I tend to find older women (not too much older 😛) a bit more mature than your younger ones, so that can be a plus. But kids? I used to be totally against it, but now I'm not sure what I'd do. I think I'd try to take everything into account like some sort of formula of love.
Click to expand...

please splain this formula of love...

 
Only if she's white, has lots of stretch marks, and is at least 60lbs overweight, and has at least $700 per kid coming in. (Thems Cadillac payments, ya know, yo!) 😛
 
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