Would this be considered putting my nose where it doesn't belong?

[XMan]

Was working on a machine in a retail store today. Myself and this young lady were the only people in there. She is muy gorgeous, and if I didn't know she had a boyfriend I'd have asked her out. Anyway, I'm hunkered up to the machine, somewhat out of sight, when the door slams open. Some guy (who I correctly assumed was her boyfriend) rushes in and starts ranting and raving about something. She pulls him toward the back of the store where they have a heated discussion which consisted mostly of him shouting. I was trying not to pay attention to them, so I didn't hear what they were saying, but I heard who was talking.

So anyway, after about five minutes he yells, "F*ck this, I'm out of here." and runs out of the store.

So here I am sitting in this empty store working on a copy machine and thinking to myself, "What the hell just happened." A couple customers come in, and the girl comes in out of the back. From the sound of her voice she's not doing so hot - probably crying, I don't know. So I'm waffling between acting like nothing happened or asking her if she's ok. A bunch of people come in, which makes me decide.

So I button the copier up, say goodbye, and leave. Later the same day I was at a different franchise of the same company and I asked one of the people that works there who I know if she knew the person at the other store. She said yes, and we started talking about her and her BF. Apparently this guy is a real jerk, and this is not something new.

So I have probably already overstepped my bounds by inquiring into the situation, but would it be even worse if I did something to cheer the lady up? Sent her a joke card or something? I've seen her probably ten times now in the store, and she always has a sad look on her face.

 

[mundania]

Well, if you do truly care that she's sad, then heck yea, do something to brighten up her day. We could all use something like that every once in a while.

But don't pursue it beyond that right now. Just get to know her. =D

 

[ltk007]

I never hurts to cheer someone up, no matter what kinda fool you might think you are making of yourself she'll probably appreciate it. It is however stupid to try to talk to her about her problems. Just be a nice guy and pay her some compliments, make her feel good about herself.

 

[buck]

Maybe not a joke card, go out with her and try to make her realize that shes not happy with that other guy. Hopefully that other guy isnt bigger than you.:Q

 

[XMan]

LOL, CKY. I would like to take her out but I don't know how I would go about doing it . . .

And yes, I'm much larger than her boyfriend. But at 6'6", you're much larger than most people.

 

[Plantanthera]

You should have said to her if she would like to talk, right after the frist argument. It is okay for you to talk to her now and ask her out for a coffee, but don't be having any thing more that that, because she is vulnerable at the moment.
Similar situation happend to me many years ago at college, and the girl endup dumped her boyfriend for me (a rebounced rlationship for her). It was a difficult 2 years we were together, because she was very sensitive and angry in our relationship. It doesn't matter how much I love her, but it wasn't enought, because she was jealous of every things, included my work & school.

 

[GL]

He might be abusive...I wouldn't do anything that might get her in trouble with him. Maybe he thinks a lot of guys are hitting on her and stuff. You never know...the most you should do is strike up a conversation with her. I bet you could make her smile by saying "Everytime I come in here I never see you smile".

-GL

 

[Viperoni]

You gotta be big to handle those mean, evil, grumpy copiers

 

[Stark]

Save her Xerox Man... it is your duty!!

Remember, Dennis didn't just stand by and let a woman be abused, he kicked some butt (en france)!!

Of course, fighting the guy might not be a wise career choice, but offering comfort to the abused is never wrong. You might not want to bring it up to her, but if she mentions it, tell her you think she's great and doesn't deserve to be treated like that. And don't ask for her number for at least a few more visits.

 

[Passions]

She's vulnerable right now, go in for the kill.

 

[Adul]

There is nothing wrong with cheering someone up who is feeling down. I do it myself just because it brings a smile to my face to do so. It require very little effort and the reward of a smile is worth it.

 

[Barrak]

Go for it, if she is unhappy she would probably give someone a chance. Just ask her for dinner or lunch to talk. Just dont go at her to strong.

 

[Tripleshot]

Be nice to her,and remain proffesional. A gentleman would offer sincere concern for her well being but you need to let her know you would be glad to be there for her WHEN she is free and available.

Sending cards or flowers or anything else is presumptuous and you would be asking for trouble. If her current boyfriend is abusive and tends to have a jealous streak,you may put her in harms way.

All that aside,I would like to kick the jerks ass just for GP,and I'm only 200lbs and 6'2". No interset in the woman,I just hate an A-hole that would embarass his girlfriend(I say that loosely)in public. But he must have something she likes or she would make a way to leave the abuse.

Maybe you should just stay out of it.Even though that may not seem the appropriate thing to do in the height of the emotion,but it is safer all the way around for all concerned.

You sound like a good person for caring enough to let us in on it.
Thanks for letting me vent.

 

[InnocentVictim]

You big pathetic softie.....................I say cheer her up! Everybody deserves a chance to smile one in a while...consider it your "duty" to give her a reason.

You sap........the boyfriend gives ya trouble, I'll back ya up!

 

[happykitten]

Be nice, but be careful. If, unfortunately, the lady *is* in an abusive relationship, your good intentions might not end up so good after all. If her boyfriend catches you trying to console her or make her feel better, he might go off the deep end again and accuse HER of cheating, flirting, being disrespectful to him, etc. (which could result in some VERY bad things).

It's very sweet of you to want to play the knight in shining armor, but until you know more about the situation... I'd stick with a kind smile and a friendly greeting the next time you see her in the store.

 

[littleprince]

THAT"S MY GF U $#*()$*(#@)$!!!!!!!!

joking.... no, seriously, she probaly deserves an anandtech guy....
go for her man!

 

[dc]

joking.... no, seriously, she probaly deserves an anandtech guy....

haha, something we don't hear very often or expect to hear.

 

[Ornery]

Two things. She's allowing the guy to walk all over her. As the girl in the other store said, "...this guy is a real jerk, and this is not something new." It's her own fault and I wouldn't feel much sympathy for her if she keeps going back for more abuse.

The other thing is, I would have talked to her about it right after he left. Doesn't bother me to stick my nose in where it doesn't belong! I would have told what a babe she is, deserves better, let's do lunch, yada yada... But you'll just have to be yourself and handle it in your own way. You only live once and this sounds like opportunity knocking. You did sabotage their copier so it would break down soon, right?