Worst Joke of the Day!

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J

J0hnny

Platinum Member
Jul 2, 2002
2,366
0
0
A police detective was investigating a homicide. As he questioned the on-scene officer, he learned the body was that of a young woman. The body was found with a bowl over her head and a spoon stuck in her back.

The on-scene officer asked what the detective thought had happened to the woman.

The detective responded, "I think it's obvious. A cereal killer got her!"
 
F

ForumMaster

Diamond Member
Feb 24, 2005
7,792
1
0
fine J0hnny. you got it. that deserves a -1/100. it sucks bad. i guess it's what you wanted so here you go.
 
A

altonb1

Diamond Member
Feb 5, 2002
6,432
0
71
How about...

What nationality are you when you have to go to the bathroom?
-- Russian (rushing)

What nationaility when you are in the bathroom?
-- European

What nationiality when you are leaving?
-- Finnish



Thank you, thank you...I'm here all week!
 
J

J0hnny

Platinum Member
Jul 2, 2002
2,366
0
0
Originally posted by: altonb1
How about...

What nationality are you when you have to go to the bathroom?
-- Russian (rushing)

What nationaility when you are in the bathroom?
-- European

What nationiality when you are leaving?
-- Finnish



Thank you, thank you...I'm here all week!
Click to expand...

You got a chuckle from me because that was so lame...
 
D

DaShen

Lifer
Dec 1, 2000
10,710
1
0
Originally posted by: J0hnny
Originally posted by: altonb1
How about...

What nationality are you when you have to go to the bathroom?
-- Russian (rushing)

What nationaility when you are in the bathroom?
-- European

What nationiality when you are leaving?
-- Finnish



Thank you, thank you...I'm here all week!
Click to expand...

You got a chuckle from me because that was so lame...
Click to expand...

Same here ;) :p I will have to use that one.
 
Ika

Ika

Lifer
Mar 22, 2006
14,264
3
81
Originally posted by: DaShen
Originally posted by: J0hnny
Originally posted by: altonb1
How about...

What nationality are you when you have to go to the bathroom?
-- Russian (rushing)

What nationaility when you are in the bathroom?
-- European

What nationiality when you are leaving?
-- Finnish



Thank you, thank you...I'm here all week!
Click to expand...

You got a chuckle from me because that was so lame...
Click to expand...

Same here ;) :p I will have to use that one.
Click to expand...

haha, those are pretty lame/good.
 
R

ruffilb

Diamond Member
Feb 6, 2005
5,096
1
0
Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony
wasn't much, but the
reception was excellent.
 
J

JDrake

Banned
Dec 27, 2005
10,246
0
0
Originally posted by: ruffilb
Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony
wasn't much, but the
reception was excellent.
Click to expand...
LMFAOOOO
these corny jokes crack me up more than the non corny ones
 
atybimf

atybimf

Platinum Member
Sep 17, 2005
2,390
0
0
Originally posted by: ruffilb
Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony
wasn't much, but the
reception was excellent.
Click to expand...

1.5/10, very nice
 
R

ruffilb

Diamond Member
Feb 6, 2005
5,096
1
0
A penguin was driving through Arizona on a hot, summer Sunday when he noticed his oil light was on.

He got out of the car and, sure enough, it was leaking oil all over the road.

The penguin drove around the corner to a service station and asked the mechanic to take a look at it.

The mechanic said he had a few others to look at first but if he came back in an hour he could tell the penguin what was wrong with his car.

The penguin agreed and went for a walk.

He found an ice-cream shop and thought a big bowl of vanilla ice cream would really hit the spot, since he was a penguin and it was Arizona in the summer, after all.

He sat down at the counter and started in on his ice cream.

Of course he had no hands so it was rather messy.

By the time he was done he had ice cream all over his flippers, and his mouth was a total mess.

He walked back to the service station and said to the mechanic, "Did you find out what is wrong with my car?"

The mechanic replied, "It looks like you've blown a seal."

"No no," said the penguin. "It's just ice cream."
 
J

JDrake

Banned
Dec 27, 2005
10,246
0
0
Originally posted by: ruffilb
A penguin was driving through Arizona on a hot, summer Sunday when he noticed his oil light was on.

He got out of the car and, sure enough, it was leaking oil all over the road.

The penguin drove around the corner to a service station and asked the mechanic to take a look at it.

The mechanic said he had a few others to look at first but if he came back in an hour he could tell the penguin what was wrong with his car.

The penguin agreed and went for a walk.

He found an ice-cream shop and thought a big bowl of vanilla ice cream would really hit the spot, since he was a penguin and it was Arizona in the summer, after all.

He sat down at the counter and started in on his ice cream.

Of course he had no hands so it was rather messy.

By the time he was done he had ice cream all over his flippers, and his mouth was a total mess.

He walked back to the service station and said to the mechanic, "Did you find out what is wrong with my car?"

The mechanic replied, "It looks like you've blown a seal."

"No no," said the penguin. "It's just ice cream."
Click to expand...
lol lemme see if I can find that jpg someone posted w/ an image of that :D
 
A

altonb1

Diamond Member
Feb 5, 2002
6,432
0
71
Originally posted by: ruffilb
A penguin was driving through Arizona on a hot, summer Sunday when he noticed his oil light was on.

He got out of the car and, sure enough, it was leaking oil all over the road.

The penguin drove around the corner to a service station and asked the mechanic to take a look at it.

The mechanic said he had a few others to look at first but if he came back in an hour he could tell the penguin what was wrong with his car.

The penguin agreed and went for a walk.

He found an ice-cream shop and thought a big bowl of vanilla ice cream would really hit the spot, since he was a penguin and it was Arizona in the summer, after all.

He sat down at the counter and started in on his ice cream.

Of course he had no hands so it was rather messy.

By the time he was done he had ice cream all over his flippers, and his mouth was a total mess.

He walked back to the service station and said to the mechanic, "Did you find out what is wrong with my car?"

The mechanic replied, "It looks like you've blown a seal."

"No no," said the penguin. "It's just ice cream."
Click to expand...

Booo...... :shocked: :thumbsup: :laugh:
 
R

ruffilb

Diamond Member
Feb 6, 2005
5,096
1
0

A guy is standing at a urinal when he notices that he is being watched by
a midget.



Although the little fellow is staring at him intently, the guy doesn't get
uncomfortable until the midget drags a small stepladder up next to him,
climbs it, and proceeds to admire his privates at close range.



"Wow," comments the midget, "Those are the nicest balls I have ever
seen!"



Surprised and flattered, the man thanks the midget and starts to move
away.



"Listen, I know this is a rather strange request," says the little fellow,
"but I wonder if you would mind if I touched them?"



Again the man is rather startled, but seeing no real harm in it, he
obliges the request.



The midget reaches out, gets a tight grip on the man's balls, and says,
"Okay, hand me your wallet or I'll jump off the ladder!"
 
BoomerD

BoomerD

No Lifer
Feb 26, 2006
66,007
14,409
146
Why do REAL cowboys wear Levi's brand condoms?


Because they shrink to fit!



What do you get when you cross a pygmy with a prostitute?
/\
A little fvcker bout so tall...
 
D

drpootums

Golden Member
Oct 22, 2004
1,315
0
0
I'm not trying to be racist, it's just the way the joke goes:


A black guy, Chinese guy, and an American guy are all living in an appartment, and each night they have to draw straws to see who gets the bed.

One night the Chinese guy got the bed, the American guy got the closet, and the black guy got the bathtub. In the middle of the night tho, the Chinese guy had to get up and use the bathroom, but he remembered the black guy was in the bathtub, so he pooped in the sheets and threw it in the closet.

In the morning the Chinese guy and the black guy heard a scream coming from the closet. They ran to see what was wrong and when they got there the American guy was panting, and yelled,

"THERE WAS A GHOST IN THE CLOSET, AND I BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF HIM!!!!"


I just figured i'd add to the list of bad jokes....;)
 
J

JDrake

Banned
Dec 27, 2005
10,246
0
0
Originally posted by: Iron Woode
Q: Why do people like dipping pieces of bread into cheese?

A: because it's fonduing it.
Click to expand...
Originally posted by: daveshel
Worse:

Duck walks into a drugstore, says, "Got any Chapstick?"
Clerk says, "Sure, here ya go."
Duck says, "Can you put it on my bill?"
Click to expand...
LMFAO (stolen from other thread incase you didn't see them)
 
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