Worst analogies ever written in high school essays

[Iron Woode]

http://trig.net/~dave/analogy.html

lol

 

[giantpinkbunnyhead]

Originally posted by: Iron Woode

McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soup.

sounds like something from a 1940's pulp detective story.

"I'm an eye, see? Private eye. The call came in this morning... a dame saw the man pushed from the roof. He fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soup...."

Hmm.

 

[Jeff7]

This thread is funny like something that is humorous.

It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.

This one reminded me of something out of Police Squad or The Naked Gun.

"It's like drinking a gallon of Draino. Sure it cleans you out, but it leaves you feeling hollow inside."

"It hurt, like jumping on a bicycle with the seat missing."

 

[shortylickens]

The vegetable soup almost made me crap myself.

I think some of these came from Police Squad and Naked Gun.

 

[Spacehead]

"She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature British beef. "

"She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up. "


:laugh:

 

[RedArmy]

This thread is full of win

 

[videogames101]

Pretty good stuff, 9/10

 

[Kadarin]

Originally posted by: Iron Woode
His fountain pen was so expensive it looked as if someone had grabbed the pope, turned him upside down and started writing with the tip of his big pointy hat.

This one

 

[Regs]

Originally posted by: Iron Woode
http://trig.net/~dave/analogy.html

lol

Todd was slightly less angry than a man who, after returning to his parking spot to find a truck double parked in front of his car and having spent the last hour in the lineup at the bank (all the while, thinking about the way his best friend had been flirting with his wife at a party the night before) followed by a run-in outside the bank with a bratty little kid carrying a water gun full of grape juice on the day the man had worn his new silk shirt, had just stepped on some gum.

LOL

 

[TehMac]

As for the analogy, I don't really have one for you. I never really liked analogies anyway. I always felt that they were like union negotiations where the two sides tried to make two radically different ideas meet, except that the ideas were sort of similar already, and there wasn't really anybody on either side negotiating.

:laugh:

 

[Aquaman]

Dec 17th beware :evil:

Cheers,
Aquaman

 

[shabby]

Originally posted by: destrekor

He was as tall as a six-foot three-inch tree.

i don't really know why, but that had me LOLing. :laugh:

Ya what the hell, this one had my laughing the most

 

[CraKaJaX]

Originally posted by: Kadarin

Originally posted by: Iron Woode
His fountain pen was so expensive it looked as if someone had grabbed the pope, turned him upside down and started writing with the tip of his big pointy hat.

This one

:laugh:

Great thread. :thumbsup:

 

[MyThirdEye]

Originally posted by: Aflac

Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36pm traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19pm at a speed of 35 mph.

hahaahaaaahahaha.

 

[Evadman]

Originally posted by: thereds
The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

Boo!!! Buncha bastards.