Why the #$% am I so socialy inept?

[Mucman]

Hubris - Exactly! Sometimes I wonder if I missed my oppurtunity... anyways, I still got my 'puters

snow patrol - the obscure music must be messing up our mind (holy alliteration batman ). Stop teasing me with your darn FTP server! I am not going to leech off of you . btw, did you checkout my collection?

 

[snow patrol]

not yet, just about to go and pick at it now

 

[Bluefront]

Dude, Hubris is 100% right on. Opportunities like you just had don't come around very often. If you go for it and get rejected...so what? No big deal. Now for what you did, you will have to live with a life-time of regrets, of what-ifs. When this opportunity comes around again with another girl, just go for it...you'll feel better afterward even if you are rejected.

 

[Mucman]

Man... I forgot to mention that a year ago, some girl one the train started talking to me... asking about the book I was reading (Code by Charles Petzold). She was running away from home to joing the Canadian military . She asked if I wanted to go out for lunch...

 

[snow patrol]

Originally posted by: Mucman
Man... I forgot to mention that a year ago, some girl one the train started talking to me... asking about the book I was reading (Code by Charles Petzold). She was running away from home to joing the Canadian military . She asked if I wanted to go out for lunch...

....and?

 

[Mucman]

I ran away with my tail between my legs! I said something about not really looking for relationships...

Someone kick me in the ass!

 

[snow patrol]

without wanting to sound gay, bend over mate. It's time to get booted!!

 

[Mucman]

Thanks! I will stop being so stupid now.

 

[jooxed]

If I were you I'd bang the shiite out of that beatch if you ever see her again. Then she will remeber you and not just you remembering her. Make it a moment to remember!


Cheers}{

 

[Mucman]

jooxed -

 

[ultimatebob]

Wow, at least you can get women to randomly start talking to you in public! That's better than I've been doing lately! Maybe I should try reading books in public places more often

Seriously though, I think that my I/T support job seems to be making my existing anti-social behavior even worse. Usually, the only time people want to talk to me at work is when:

A) They broke something, and either need me to fix it or give them advice on how to do so.
B) It's a manager assigning me a new project to work on.

The funny thing is that the amount of friendly smalltalk seems to increase depending upon how badly they need my help. If all they need is a password change or a new user account, they won't do much more than say hello. BUT, when people start visiting my office and asking me how my weekend was, it usually means that they have a six-hour server installation scheduled for me

Some of my friends and family members aren't much better, and treat me like I'm their personal tech support line. It's really easy to stop trusting people when they are constantly trying to take advantage of you

 

[Mucman]

ultimatebob - I gues you are right... it's better than being completely ignored... heck, a 50 year old woman told me I looked cute when I was wearing this shirt. Actually I've had half a dozen comments on that shirt... yeesh... what the heck am I doing??? btw, I work in tech support, but I am very very informal with the customers... today I sent a customer pictures of my cats . I also gave another customer tips on making his own computer... my boss doesn't like it but too bad for him. The customers like me

 

[Kadarin]

Originally posted by: caramel
Some of us just will never know what to do/say/think at the right time. That doesn't make you inept. And Adul is right, if things are meant to be, they'll happen.

caramel, isn't that kind of the definition of inept? But I agree, if things are meant to happen, they will. You just need to put yourself in a situation where it's possible.

Yesterday morning a strange event happened to me. A girl started talking to me :Q

Mucman.. I don't even know how to begin responding to that. I suggest getting out more..

 

[Turkey]

Hey, it's like this: usually when a guy starts talking to a "random" girl, he wants some, and when a girl starts talking to a "random" guy, she wants to use him for something. Just the way things go... you probably did yourself a favor.

 

[gotsmack]

you need to start building up those social skills. I was pretty much the same way up until this year. now I'm pretty good at making small talk, but I just don't want to do it.

 

[Hammer]

lol

Originally posted by: Mucman
jooxed -

 

[tcsenter]

instead I go back to my books pretending that I am a 1337 h4x0r or a mighty wizard doomed to marry my computers, cats, and my guitar!

Why the #$% am I so socialy inept?

Because you even know what 1337 h4x0r is and use words like Mighty Wizard. I've found that virtually every computer + Magic the Gathering nerd is paralyzed in social situations involving women.

 

[JellyBaby]

Anyway, I'm pretty awful in the "reading the signals" dept., too. I do OK with traffic lights but the vibes sent out by our females don't register properly with me.

And remember girls rarely come to you; you must come to them.

 

[Mucman]

Astaroth33 - I get out everyday . I have commute 3 hours daily by transit to work. Lunch breaks I am usually walking around downtown, checking out the local shops. Usually when I get home I go for a walk or a bike ride. My Sundays are spent visiting my Mom, and then visiting my Dad. Mondays (I work tues-sat) are spent doing crap I need to get done. If by "out" you mean going to bars/clubs, no thanks. I hate those places.

tcsenter - Do those words imply that is all I know about? I admit that I am extremely geeky, but that's not going to change. I will always watch the Discovery channel, read tech journals not Maxim, play with my computers, play my guitar, listen to obscure music. Nobodies going to change me... although that is what I was looking for in this thread wasn't I? Who knows, love is a hard game, and the end guy is really tough

JellyBaby - I usually never approach girls... I am never on the "hunt" so when I am out and about doing my thing, that's not the first thing on my mind... maybe that will have to change... who knows.

 

[kami]

Join the club Mucman However, maybe it was for the best. The girl was on the rebound. One of my first relationships was a rebounder and it was a mistake.
Where do you hang out to meet girls? Do you have any of those book stores around you with a coffee shop inside them? Hell if girls are asking YOU (never happens to me), then you are guaranteed something if you ask them. get out there and get a woman

 

[Mucman]

kami - Where do I hang out to meet girls? LOL good one . I never approach girls, and the ones that approach me I think are weird (why the heck would someone approach me? The must be messed up or something ). I say this because all through high-school and even University I've never seemed to attract a girls attention... except that group of girls that smacked me on the ass at the bus stop a couple years back (I posted about it... I wonder if it's in the archives ).

get out there and get a woman

Easier said than done my friend

 

[JellyBaby]

What a bunch of pathetic losers we are.

I guess the bottom line is if you're content in your Geekness, just go with it. If the natural urges to procreate aren't strong, don't. That's what pr0n is for.

If you don't succomb to societal pressure to get married, that's great! Free-willed, intellectual beings don't *have* to follow tradition.

As the kid's tune goes, "If you're happy and you know it, crap your pants".

 

[Mucman]

JellyBaby - Hehe, you said it! I do want to get married though. I can't wait to have kids! I just don't want to deal with the dating crap... it's a game that I never want to play.

hmm, anyone got a number for good mail order brides?

 

[Siddhartha]

How old are you?

Talk to her the next time you see her. If she acts friendly, there may be an opportunity for you.
If you do get a chance to talk to her again, ask questions about her life and what she does. Also say things
like: uh huh, really, and then what happened, etc.

 

[Orsorum]

Originally posted by: Dr Smooth
How old are you?

Talk to her the next time you see her. If she acts friendly, there may be an opportunity for you.
If you do get a chance to talk to her again, ask questions about her life and what she does. Also say things
like: uh huh, really, and then what happened, etc.

Essentially, be a good listener (from a woman's point-of-view).