Why men shouldn't marry nowadays...

[blahblah99]

Why men should not marry.
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All the older guys I know, guys that are 55 and older are telling me the same story; don't do it. It just turns to crap no matter what you do. They'd rather be independent. At best it's a tedious bore. At worst a living hell with financial ruin thrown in for good measure. The problem is that when you're young, you just naturally fall into this mind set where your whole self image is based on how women regard you, and so you spend all your money and energy trying to make yourself acceptable to them. Then later in life the shine wears off and you finally realize that you've wasted yourself on a bunch of crap.
Children - "the ultimate human experience"
I couldn't even begin to list all of the older folks i know from work or through my family with kids they either don't get along with, are disappointed in, or are so distant as to not even be a factor in each other's lives.

I'm really skeptical about the idea of children as "the ultimate blessing." How many friends do you have with little or no meaningful contact or relationships with their parents?

I would wager the statistic for happy child/parent relations would be as bad, if not worse, than the marriage numbers. Who wants to deal with TWO bitter, unfulfilling relationships?!


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Marriage is a sham for men. There is no benefit. If you are about to get married, think it over. Don't let your dick do your thinking for you. Don't let your punch-drunk I'm in love euphoria put you on auto-pilot. You will wake up in a hell of a hangover staring at this woman who will control your life.


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A few years ago I went through a major depression over this until I started talking to all the older guys I knew...and they all said the same thing; "don't do it, it's shit. Even when it's not bad, it's shit". You end up being closely tied to an old woman. Think about that. I can go to Europe or the south seas tomorrow. If I was married I wouldn't have the money and I'd have to ask HER permission. Don't get married unless you are absolutely religiously in love with her. Like carry her sick aged body to the toilet and wipe her ass and be happy to do it kind of love.

What I'm saying is that human beings are nasty weak treacherous creatures that are for the most part totally untrustworthy. Experience is my basis for this statement, both mine and others who I know or who have written reliable histories. If you can find a woman to be your companion who is not treacherous, a deceitful little actress, a sly whore or a manipulative nag or a shrieking hag, then you are among the lucky few. Congratulations. I hope your luck continues to hold out.


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Ok, assume that you will end up divorced and won't see your kids and lose half of your assets, how different is that from being married?

Most married guys I know are working their asses off to pay bills, rarely to get to spend time with their families, mediocre or no sex life, and have wives that spend as much of their money as absolutely possible.

My problem with marriage isn't a fear of divorce; it is that the whole thing sucks divorce or not.


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What security is there for men in marriage?
If I cheat on my wife, she gets half my shit.
If she cheats on me, she still gets half my shit.
Why the fvck should i get married?


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Fvck it man, it's easy to get depressed about not being married when we live in a society that constantly feeds us the image of the happy couple. It's one big lie. The happiest person alive is someone who isn't a prisoner dependent on another human being... We only have 80 or so years on this rock to achieve true freedom


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Very few marriages last nowadays, and even guys older than me are telling me not to even think about it... It's a grossly overrated source of happiness. And for the 80% that do go through divorce, it will financially ruin you for life. Period. You can take your best 10 earning years from say, 35 to 45 and take all the wealth you would have accumulated and flush it down the toilet. Because it will go to her and her lawyer. If it happens naturally and it's good then great, good luck. But the worst thing is to force it, to make gross exertions and ignore all sorts of red lights going off just to be hooked up and "normal". Get some hobbies. Relax. Hang out. Enjoy. Take life as it comes.


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As men, we all know that a woman's primary objective is to marry. After years of experience I've discovered their most commonly used strategy. here it is:

1. Girl pressures guy for marriage.

2. Guy delays.

3. Girl gradually starts destroying guy's self-esteem and eliminating his friends.

4. Guy becomes too weak and too much of a loser to find something better than what he has.

5. Girl starts to limit sex. In effect controlling the only good thing in the guy's life.

6. Guy is in despair. Capitulates to marriage.


Then 5-10 years later the guy is an empty shell of his former self. Girl is a ruthless manipulating machine. Girl divorces loser husband. Girl takes 80% of guy's stuff because the guy is too brain dead to find a good lawyer. Girl lives happily ever after. Guy becomes bald alcoholic who dies of heart attack at 45 years old.

 

[Lyfer]

Umm, k.

 

[Dacalo]

Little biased wouldn't you say? :roll:

 

[TheLonelyPhoenix]

Originally posted by: blahblah99
Don't get married unless you are absolutely religiously in love with her. Like carry her sick aged body to the toilet and wipe her ass and be happy to do it kind of love.

The only part of that whole post I agreed with.

 

[OulOat]

Deja vu? I've got a feeling I've seen this before.

 

[chrisms]

Let me just say it's easy to think this way while you are actually still married. My father recently divorced my mother after over 30 years, for no reason really. They never fought much, just kind of got along. But now he is taking even more anti-depressents and has tried twice to get her back. Now it's quite obvious he is a lonely old man with no hope in sight.

Marriage saves you from the situation my father is in. I'm not old enough to be an authority on these things and I've never been married, just making an assumption off of what I've seen.

 

[The Stigenator]

i agree.. i aint getting married anytime soon. even so i am going to be even more careful of the woman i picked. My ex would have been marriage material until she started turning into all kinds of things i dont want to write here about.

If I get married, the woman will sign a prenup, and live by MY rules and play fair 50/50.

 

[andyfasthands]

hahahaha

 

[nukexbi]

My guess is that anyone who says those things about marriage and families were either a bad husband or father or both. Their problems lie with their selfishness. You can only get out of a family what you put into it. I actually feel sorry for these bitter men.
I can just look at my kids pictures and feel nothing but pure joy. Being a good father makes me more proud than any work accomplishment. (Please note that I'm not always a good father, but I try).

The funny thing about this blahblah99 is that the human race would end if we all quit having kids because they cost too much or whatever.

-Scott

 

[winr]

Be very selective in whom you trust be they Female or Male.

Most People I know who have gotten married, Female and Male later say " I dont know what happened to them, they changed"
I found out in my case, they didn't change, they were always that way, they just hid it from me.

 

[BespinReactorShaft]

Related reading:

http://www.intellectualwhores.com/masterladder.html

 

[datalink7]

WTF is this? A random selection of posts from the "ihatewomen" forum?

Not your words.
+Random selection of stuff.
--------------
This Rant Sucks


You get no bonus points.

 

[Siddhartha]

The only good reason I can think of to get married is to have kids.

 

[SynthDude2001]

Originally posted by: winr
Be very selective in whom you trust be they Female or Male.

Quoted for truth (applies to friends too)

 

[loic2003]

Here's the source of the above quotes:

LIIIIIINK!!!

Check out the conversation under "What your future wife will be thinking a few years after you have children". If it's true... christ those are some nasty women.

 

[JoeBird]

I hava to agree with the OP to a certain extent. I am in my late 30's, and last night I ran into a friend from 20 years ago. Lost track of her along the way, turns out she has got married when she was 21, and is still married.

That bumps the number of couples my age, from all my friends who got married back in the day, that are still marrried to original spouse,to two. Yup, thats right, two couples out dozens that got married are still married. Granted some of them have been remarried once or twice, most are single, trying to eek out a living, paying child support and/or alimony.

I can tell ya, it is hell trying to find a woman that is not decietful, a gold digger, a tramp, not a drug/drink abuser. Why bother?

Last year I read an article about succesful men not marrying, for the financial reasons that the OP pointed out. In this article, succesful carrer woman were complaining about the lack of "suitable" men willing to marry, they have no one to blame but there peers for the way they have made a sham out of marrage.

Lets cross out fingers and hope the upcoming generations can look at the mess we have and bring about a more positive attitude about marrage and relationships!

 

[TheLonelyPhoenix]

Originally posted by: JoeBird
In this article, succesful carrer woman were complaining about the lack of "suitable" men willing to marry, they have no one to blame but there peers for the way they have made a sham out of marrage.

Cosmopolitian++;

 

[0]

stoopid.

 

[stephenw22]

One solution is to marry a woman that has goals and desires of her own. I've paid for my wife's degree(s) at school, but in a year or two she'll be making more than I am. Even part-time hours, with a family on the side, she can make some decent money.

The other thing is that if you're thinking of getting married, tell your gf to write down a 5-year and 10-year plan of where she thinks you'll achieve and accomplish (as a couple), and do one of your own. Make sure that you both make the lists independently. Then sit down with each other and go over the lists. If her plan lacks detail, she either hasn't thought it over, or she's writing down what she thinks you want to see. That should set off a warning beacon. Also, it will give you a chance to see how your goals actually match up.

 

[J Heartless Slick]

Originally posted by: TheGoodGuy
i agree.. i aint getting married anytime soon. even so i am going to be even more careful of the woman i picked. My ex would have been marriage material until she started turning into all kinds of things i dont want to write here about.

If I get married, the woman will sign a prenup, and live by MY rules and play fair 50/50.

"live by MY rules" and "play fair 50\50" sound contradictory to me...

 

[StageLeft]

Rubbish. More hateful, disenchanted rhetoric from another loser who's so incompetent with interpersonal relationships as to think it's a fault of the institution of them as opposed to his inabilities. As mentioned, a little bit of selfishness goes a long way into having poor relationships throughout one's life.

I'm not being defensive though. I read things like this, and nomarriage.com and my emotions are half humour and half pity that somebody is so clueless, but it's their own fault, and as misery loves company they tend to encourage more into the fold.

I can tell ya, it is hell trying to find a woman that is not decietful, a gold digger, a tramp, not a drug/drink abuser. Why bother?

I've found one, as have most of the friends I have.

 

[Lola]

Originally posted by: Skoorb
Rubbish. More hateful, disenchanted rhetoric from another loser who's so incompetent with interpersonal relationships as to think it's a fault of the institution of them as opposed to his inabilities. As mentioned, a little bit of selfishness goes a long way into having poor relationships throughout one's life.

I'm not being defensive though. I read things like this, and nomarriage.com and my emotions are half humour and half pity that somebody is so clueless, but it's their own fault, and as misery loves company they tend to encourage more into the fold.

I can tell ya, it is hell trying to find a woman that is not decietful, a gold digger, a tramp, not a drug/drink abuser. Why bother?

I've found one, as have most of the friends I have.

you speak the truth. :beer:

 

[PingSpike]

There's good women out there. You just have to learn to never settle for anything less, even if that means you're alone.

 

[Isla]

Huh.

The other day, my very handsome, very intelligent husband THANKED me for being his wife and putting up with him all these years. Told me that he is a BETTER person for it. He's changed A LOT over the years.

Even though we are not 'old' yet (still in our 30's) some signs of aging are creeping in. He has a bad back and has to work constantly at keeping the pain under control through stretching and exercise. I expect that one day, we will need to buy him one of those chairs that eject him out when he wants to get up. Yes, I will be married to 'an old man'. But that's OK... I'm a woman and I embrace the cycles of life to the fullest. I was the 'maiden' at one point (that was annoying... I was so stupid!) I'm fully in the 'mother' stage right now, and one day, I will be the 'crone'. Same for my husband, just the masculine stages apply. It is part of the fullness of life.

*shrug*

 

[ggnl]

Originally posted by: nukexbi
My guess is that anyone who says those things about marriage and families were either a bad husband or father or both. Their problems lie with their selfishness. You can only get out of a family what you put into it. I actually feel sorry for these bitter men.
I can just look at my kids pictures and feel nothing but pure joy. Being a good father makes me more proud than any work accomplishment. (Please note that I'm not always a good father, but I try).

The funny thing about this blahblah99 is that the human race would end if we all quit having kids because they cost too much or whatever.

-Scott

QFT

I'm sure most fathers you ask will tell you that having children/raising a family is the single biggest accomplishment in their life. The men that talk about women in the manner of the OP are usually the one's who aren't willing to give what it takes to successfully raise a family. It's not easy to do, and when the marriage fails because you couldn't hack it, it a lot easier to blame that bitch of a wife than to accept responsibility for your actions.

In short, many men are pathetic and blame the women in their lives for their own shortcomings.