Why I desperately need a "promotion" from "customer service".

[jonnyGURU]

We sell a socket A CPU.

The customer gets the CPU and fries it because they peeled the rubber thingies off the corners, puts on a crappy fan, if any at all, and fires it up and lets it lock up for about 30 minuts while they scratch their nuts wondering why the PC doesn't boot into Windows.

Customer calls up salesperson.

"Ooooh! We're so sorry helpless little computer user newbie. Yes. It much more complicated than assembling short wave equipment, yes. No no no.... Don't cry. We'll swap out your CPU, but you have to promise that you buy a biggie wiggie fan for the widdle CPU."

I get the package with the burnt CPU in it. There's a chip in the die. Scorch marks in the glaze. NO SIGN of thermal compound. The rubber pads are missing. The UPS tracking shows that the customer didn't even send the package back to us until 5 days after the RMA is issued and by the time I get it, it's 15 days late on a 15 day warranty!

I read the notes from the sales person about REPLACING the CPU and SELLING a fan with the replacement and giving the guy a full one year warranty this next time around.

What do I do?

Erase all of that sales hole crap. Put a note saying that I have confirmed the CPU is dead and that I refuse to replace it because the CPU has every sign that the user is completely incompetent and shouldn't be attempting assembling a PC in the first place.

Sigh.....


It's like this guy I just got off the phone with. He wants to build his first PC. HIS FIRST, and he decides to buy all of his parts from online vendors... DIFFERENT ONLINE VENDORS.

After he wets his pants because it doesn't fire up, he calls me.

"Why doesn't it POST?"

"Dunno. Jumpers set wrong?", I say. "Do you have ANY redundant parts in the house? Extra RAM, extra CPU?"

"No. My current PC is a 486. About those jumpers, I'm not really sure I know if they are correct. What should the jumpers be set at?"

"I don't know." I respond, "We don't sell that board and I've never set one of those up. Didn't you call the people you got the board from?"

"They don't have tech support. Can I send the CPU to you?"

"The place you bought the board from doesn't even have tech support for JUMPER SETTINGS HELP?!?! Well, you can send me the CPU, but if it's good, I'll send it back and think of a way to charge you for wasting my time (I'm kidding, of course)."

"What should I do?"

"Umm.... I don't know. Take it to a computer store so they can trouble shoot it." Just then, I hear a cow moo and a rooster crow in the back ground, "On second thought, send the CPU back to me. If it's good, I'll just send it back, but then you'll have to contact whoever you bought the board from."

Sigh...... AGAIN!

They need to stick me in a hole and have me just build PCs all day.

Anyone see yesterday's Dilbert? The Creep? I want that job.

 

[Howard]

The only solution is...

Move to Canada, eh!

 

[geno]

<< but you have to promise that you buy a biggie wiggie fan for the widdle CPU >>


LOL, Johnny, you have such a way with words...such a way that exposes these peoples' idiocy

 

[Hamburgerpimp]

My next door neighbor was pounding on my door last night at 11:00 because his printer would not print. I had to go over there and reinstall everything. That really took a chunk out of my posting time here in OT. The only reason I help him is because he gives me free beer. Just my little rant!

 

[jonnyGURU]

Dude! If you get paid WITH BEER QUIT YOUR WHINING!!!!

 

[Hamburgerpimp]

Well, it is his homemade beer and it tastes a little wierd. :Q

 

[Midnight Rambler]

jonnyGURU:

While I can appreciate that it can be frustrating dealing with incompetents, the underlying question at the end of the day is what difference does it really make? Is it any skin off your back if your company replaces that idiot's CPU for free? (Note: If you are a part owner, or have profit sharing, I see your point). But otherwise, all it does is stress you and make you dislike your job, ie. the only person being affected negatively is you. Myself, I try to take these kinds of things lightly, even make humor of them. For example, we have a Manufacturing Manager who is a complete idiot. She's very intelligent, has a degree in Nuclear Engineering, but when it comes to common sense and everyday mechanical stuff, she hasn't a clue. I can get literally a couple dozen calls a day from her to send my engineers or skilled tradesmen out to fix something in manufacturing, only to find that there was no problem or that their line repair should have easily fixed it. Not to mention all the times when their operators are not following the posted operating instructions. So not only does she annoy me, but also my skilled people. And it's always a &quot;hot job&quot;, like we're about to shut an assembly plant down because we're not getting the parts out to them. Welp, about a year or so ago, I went out and bought 4 of those firemen's helmets with the rotating flashing red light built in to the top. Now when I send someone out on a call that I suspect is bogus, the guys wear these hats. It's hilariously fun (did it myself a few times) and a good way to cope/let off steam. Plus, I think she's starting to get the message. I'd suggest a similar coping mechanism if you like your job and want to continue it without letting the hassles get to you.

 

[Dameon]

Hamburger - don't come crying if you wake up tied up with an apple in your mouth and a painful soreness in some personal areas. Gotta watch drinkin' that &quot;funny beer&quot;.

 

[8ball]

<< Is it any skin off your back if your company replaces that idiot's CPU for free? >>


It would be to me. An employee should care about how much money the company is wasting and try to reduce it. It shows that the employee cares and could result in a raise, bonus, promotion, etc...

 

[RossMAN]

Well, it is his homemade beer and it tastes a little wierd.

Hmmn makes you wonder just what kinda ingredients went into making that beer

 

[Missus]

I am in customer service... But a different kind... credit stuff...

But I know what you are talking about... I run into that kind of stuff with people trying to figure out thier bills...

I have been practically living here lately for the ot....

I am glad that I can pull this up... They have restricted our internet use.

But unfortunately it is part of the job... I am not on the phone yet and there are already a couple calls waiting... It is 7.30am ... why would a cc bill be so important at 7.30am??? I would rather be in bed...

 

[jonnyGURU]

Because I want to cut them off at the pass: They blow up the CPU, you sell them a fan and say don't do it again. They do it again and then come to the conclusion that you sell defective components.

That call usually gets forwarded to me because no one else in the company has enough balls to flat out say &quot;Sir, you're doing something wrong.&quot;

 

[SuperSix]

Jonny... Do NOT think abput the helmet idea, the flashing light would be too distracting.

Email your management... I'm sure they will correct the problem..


BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA


Luv ya Jonny.

 

[jonnyGURU]

SuperSix: Just wait until you see the response I got about the Topower power supply issue. &quot;They still work don't they?&quot; Buwahahahahahahaha!!!

It's only the cape I want. Not the helmet. Gotta have a cape.

 

[FettsBabe]

You need the promotion, so you can fix the cars your wife wipes out!!

 

[Adul]

Staret you own tech support line that is fee based