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Why get married???

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That's what i was hoping to have but it just didnt culminate into that. We did go way to fast to the marriage stage and i regret that. As for working through the problems--she used alcohol instead of communication. I take blame for all this but at least i learned from all this. But it sure aint fun.

 
People do tend to jump into marriage and having kids too fast. It was over 2 years after meeting that we got married and only after having had lived together for over a year did we go ahead with it. As for kids it'll be at least 3 years before we have them. Children can put incredible stress on a relationship. Having 3 or more years before having kids gives a couple time to get to know each other and form a strong bond. When kids come into the picture that bond gets tested pretty hard. Without a background together that bond can be quite easily snapped by having kids.
I don't know about other men but I will need all the time I can get to be used to the idea of having kids. I have enough problems with cats... Kids? *gulp* *fearful eyes*
Like I said I need all the time I can get...
 
<<People do tend to jump into marriage and having kids too fast. It was over 2 years after meeting that we got married and only after having had lived together for over a year did we go ahead with it. As for kids it'll be at least 3 years before we have them. Children can put incredible stress on a relationship. Having 3 or more years before having kids gives a couple time to get to know each other and form a strong bond. When kids come into the picture that bond gets tested pretty hard. Without a background together that bond can be quite easily snapped by having kids.
I don't know about other men but I will need all the time I can get to be used to the idea of having kids. I have enough problems with cats... Kids? *gulp* *fearful eyes*
Like I said I need all the time I can get...>>

You are very right. There is much stress involved in raising children. It makes it only harder if the couple is not in tune with one another. When you are young you tend not to know yourself, much less your spouse, enough to know what you stand for and what knowledge you want to pass to your kids. My wife and I waited 4 years after we got married to give a solid foundation that the kids could grow from... thus far it was a good decision. As with most situations, patience can be one of the greatest allies.

 
I got married mostly to have someone organize my bills! Damn! I never could remember to pay my bills on time.
 


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<< Why get married at all? What is the benefit? Nag, bitch, moan, stupid holiday gifts and trips to see their damn parents! >>



another virgin speaks his mind 🙂😉 >>

 


<< Thats kinda funny since my divorce finalizes tomorrow. >>



i kinda doubt this. why would you come here and ask this type of question if you already know the damn answer? yours didnt work out, too bad, so sad. not everyone in thi world is like you. a lot of marriages do work out, and are continuing to work out as i type this. maybe you got invovled with the wrong woman/man. people get maried because they want to spend the rest of their lives together. something im assuming you felt since you got married to someone already.
 


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<< I don't have a link, but I've read in multiple studies that in the past 10 years, approximately 50% of marriages have disolved. Scary >>



Yeah, well if people don't get married, that 50% that make it, won't. So you're saying that we should all cohabitate to prevent the disintigration of marriages? >>

True. Of those that break up far too many should not have gotten married in the first place. Going out for 2 months and screwing around while at it is a great ingredient in a failed marriage, for instance. >>



true, very true. or even those two dayers. thats even more absurd. im in a long term relationship, and we plan to get married sometime soon when we have enough money to have a decent sized/nice wedding.
 
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