Why get Married?

[Shadowknight]

Originally posted by: SilentZero
Maybe you caught teh gay at one of those RP groups???

If not, I call shens.

... I suppose you know from personal experience.

How is making a thead that asks a question "shens".

 

[dud]

Assuming you really are who you say (a 27 year old who has never been on a date and I assume never been intimate) you are asking this question rather late in life (again assuming you have never asked it before).

If you are who you say you are I have just as many questions as you do about you relationship preferences. You mentioned being ostracised and treated badly, do you think this MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING TO DO with your aversion to a relationship? If we were to interview 1000 people (over the age of 27) and ask them if they had had a date by the age of 27 then I bet you that at least 990 would say yes. You mention medication, perhaps your questions should be asked of yourself. Why do you think that this is a "bad" thing with "outdated" ceremonies and all?

 

[Schadenfreude]

At the risk of sounding a girly, it's more or less a symbolic bond between two people.

After all, you can only marry one person (at a time, at least).

 

[Shadowknight]

I'm wondering why regardless of religion, or lack of it, why marriages involve a Christian style wedding. Why not just get the mariage license at City Hall and let it be at that? Why not something more unique, say a Japanese style wedding? I day in the park with a relaxed dress code instead of a dreary church? Why spend thousands on one day, with the only lasting outcome is being married, a couple of gold rings, and a bunch of pictures?

Being treated badly kept me from having friends, but I've never felt like dating, period, in the first place at any age.

If two people are truly committed to each other, does it really matter if they go through a legal or religious ceremony to "officially" bind them together? Is it necessary as long as they are open about their attachment to each other, living together, and having children?

After getting over my emotional issues, I find I really am not interested in dating or being with another person. I don't need anyone to make me happy. I don't understand how two people can be so emotionally attached to each other to consider it "true love". I've seen thread after thread on forums, as well as knowing people in real life, that seem to go through tons of drama involving their relationships. The only opinion I have is that to me a live in relationship/marriage isn't that different from having a man stay with you; you're just sharing the same bed vs. separate rooms. What's the difference in being in a relationship, all other things being the same as having a roommate? What makes it worth putting up with each other's personality quirks for years, if not the rest of your life?

 

[SilentZero]

Originally posted by: Shadowknight

Originally posted by: SilentZero
Maybe you caught teh gay at one of those RP groups???

If not, I call shens.

... I suppose you know from personal experience.

How is making a thead that asks a question "shens".

Ummm no, sorry to disappoint you. I'm straight and happily so, and have been married for just about 8 years.

And I call shens because your situation just doesn't seem plauseable in my opinion. No offense, but I can't say that I know that many people that are male and 27, never dated, and aren't interested in sex or anything related to it. The whole RP groups and cat thing are just added factors. The majority of people I know are all married (most with kids), or either in a relationship or seeking one. Hey if your content being alone then good for you, whatever floats your boat, its just that threads like this in ATOT normally turn out to be shens 95% of the time.

 

[Night Blade]

Originally posted by: Gillbot

Originally posted by: bjc112

I've never even gone out on a date

/end thread

:laugh:

 

[Night Blade]

Originally posted by: Shadowknight
I'm wondering why regardless of religion, or lack of it, why marriages involve a Christian style wedding. Why not just get the mariage license at City Hall and let it be at that? Why not something more unique, say a Japanese style wedding? I day in the park with a relaxed dress code instead of a dreary church? Why spend thousands on one day, with the only lasting outcome is being married, a couple of gold rings, and a bunch of pictures?

Being treated badly kept me from having friends, but I've never felt like dating, period, in the first place at any age.

If two people are truly committed to each other, does it really matter if they go through a legal or religious ceremony to "officially" bind them together? Is it necessary as long as they are open about their attachment to each other, living together, and having children?

After getting over my emotional issues, I find I really am not interested in dating or being with another person. I don't need anyone to make me happy. I don't understand how two people can be so emotionally attached to each other to consider it "true love". I've seen thread after thread on forums, as well as knowing people in real life, that seem to go through tons of drama involving their relationships. The only opinion I have is that to me a live in relationship/marriage isn't that different from having a man stay with you; you're just sharing the same bed vs. separate rooms. What's the difference in being in a relationship, all other things being the same as having a roommate? What makes it worth putting up with each other's personality quirks for years, if not the rest of your life?

Your only 27 now, give it time & try to consider what life will be by YOURSELF, now imagine yourself at 35, 40, 50, 60, 75. Imagine how you'd feel at that time, think about how bad you'd feel at 75 never having someone to share your life with & it's almost over.

What about kids? What about the challenge? These days marriage is a challenge for a lot of people i'm sure, I have my quirks about my wife, she drives me nuts, but I love her to death. I couldn't image my life without her, just doesn't seem right, she makes life worth living, my daughter makes me happy just thinking about her.

My 2 cents.

 

[abc]

Originally posted by: orion23
I believe that weddings are just for the bride to get a lot of attention.
Women are usually attention "girls" and this is their glory day.
I also feel that most men would like to make their women happy, very happy. So she will get anything she wants on that day, no matter how expensive or out there it may be.

I personally couldn't care less about the "ceremony, ritual, marriage" but if it is very important to her, I'll just do it!

totally agree, i dont care about the whole event... also there is a technical difference, the act of getting married is diff. from the life of 'being married'...

which one is the OP questioning?

 

[IAteYourMother]

Originally posted by: Shadowknight
I'm wondering why regardless of religion, or lack of it, why marriages involve a Christian style wedding. Why not just get the mariage license at City Hall and let it be at that? Why not something more unique, say a Japanese style wedding? I day in the park with a relaxed dress code instead of a dreary church? Why spend thousands on one day, with the only lasting outcome is being married, a couple of gold rings, and a bunch of pictures?

Being treated badly kept me from having friends, but I've never felt like dating, period, in the first place at any age.

If two people are truly committed to each other, does it really matter if they go through a legal or religious ceremony to "officially" bind them together? Is it necessary as long as they are open about their attachment to each other, living together, and having children?

After getting over my emotional issues, I find I really am not interested in dating or being with another person. I don't need anyone to make me happy. I don't understand how two people can be so emotionally attached to each other to consider it "true love". I've seen thread after thread on forums, as well as knowing people in real life, that seem to go through tons of drama involving their relationships. The only opinion I have is that to me a live in relationship/marriage isn't that different from having a man stay with you; you're just sharing the same bed vs. separate rooms. What's the difference in being in a relationship, all other things being the same as having a roommate? What makes it worth putting up with each other's personality quirks for years, if not the rest of your life?

err... it doesn't have to be... my aunt, who's a pastor, did have a christian wedding, but it was a traditional korean style wedding. pretty cool. Anyways... I assume you understand that it's abnormal not to have friends... so your view is probably fairly... unique

 

[Nitemare]

Originally posted by: moshquerade
<--- not a fan of marriage

Way overrated...

 

[edmundoab]

just to make it legal for 2 beings to live together officially and have children?

in western cultures perhaps a little more relax on the issue to get married or not
but for Asian Culture, Living in Sin still not totally accepted by the entire society as yet...

getting there though LOL